Undone(41)

‘I’m just sorry it’s not a girls’ night in like we planned.’ This is surprising.

I smile. ‘I don’t mind at all – the more, the merrier, I reckon.’

Sasha hops up onto the worktop next to me and folds a pair of oven gloves on her lap. ‘He likes you.’

My heart performs an anxious somersault. ‘Who?’

‘You know who.’ A sly smile.

I swallow. ‘Stu?’

‘Ha! No! You’re not exactly his type – and trust me, that’s a good thing. Am I going to have to spell this out for you? Name starts with “L”, ends in “ucas”? Ringing any bells?’

I can’t help but laugh. ‘What are you on about?’

‘He likes you. I can tell.’ She looks awfully pleased with herself. The cat that got the cream, with a side order of dead mouse.

‘You’re out of your mind. Why would he . . . ? You’re kidding, right?’

‘Nope. That boy is so easy to read it’s not even funny.’

I don’t know where to look or what to think. She’s watching me, waiting to see how I react. But how the f*ck am I meant to react in this situation? What are you supposed to say when a boy’s ex-girlfriend (very recently ex) tells you he likes you? And how are you supposed to feel?

‘I . . . You’re wrong.’

Sasha shakes her head and smiles. ‘Ah, Jem, you have so much to learn. I’m never wrong about things like this. Never. It’s a gift. So what do you think? Reckon you might go for it?’

‘He . . . I mean, you and him were . . .’

She rolls her eyes. ‘Ancient history! Well, not exactly ancient, but you know what I mean. I’m so over that – and clearly Lucas is too. No need to be awkward and weird about it.’ She places her hand on my head and puts on this deep, solemn sort of voice. ‘By the power vested in me as The Ex-Girlfriend, I hereby give you permission to do whatever the hell you like with Lucas Mahoney. I give you my blessing.’

I giggle and scoot out from under her hand. ‘You’re crazy. People at school have no idea how weird you truly are, do they?’

She pulls a face. ‘Nope, and I’d like to keep it that way, thank you very much! Now, seriously – Lucas . . . yay or nay? On the pro side, I can tell you that the sex is exceptionally good. I’ve trained him well – you can thank me later.’

‘Ewww! I don’t want to hear it!’

‘On the con side, he spends far too much time in front of the mirror. And his obsession with football might get on your nerves a bit. Any questions?’

I’m blushing, I can feel it. The redness must be powerful enough to break through the layers of makeup. ‘Why are you telling me all this? It’s . . . kind of weird, isn’t it?’

‘Here’s the way I see it. I like Lucas and I want him to be happy. I like you and I want you to be happy. Lucas fancies you but it remains to be seen whether you fancy him. So . . . ? Do you?’

‘I–’

An insistent beeping sound comes from the oven timer and Sasha leaps off the counter, brandishing the oven gloves. ‘Saved by the bell!’ She goes to open the oven, then changes her mind and turns to face me. ‘Actually . . . I’m not going to let you squirm out of it that easily. I’m not getting those pizzas out until you tell me. If everyone has to eat burnt pepperoni I’m blaming you, so you’d better spill . . . What do you think of him?’ She flicks the oven gloves over her shoulder, then crosses her arms looking as smug as you like.

Something tells me that Bugs wouldn’t be too happy if I ruined his dinner, and Sasha’s clearly not budging, so I have to say something. My mind flits between all the possible things I could say, before eventually settling on the truth.

‘I have no idea how I feel about him.’

I’d forgotten what it feels like to tell the truth.

Sasha narrows her eyes and she’s about to say something when Bugs comes barrelling into the kitchen shouting, ‘I WANT MY PIZZA, WOMAN!’ He picks Sasha up, hoists her over his shoulder and proceeds to circle the kitchen making an assortment of unappealing grunting noises.

For the rest of the night I do my best to make sure I’m not left alone with Sasha, and I watch Lucas for any signs that she could be right. But it’s so far outside the realms of possibility that my brain has difficulty taking it seriously. Still, Sasha seemed so sure, and why would she say something like that if she didn’t think it was true? And Lucas has been friendly to me – way friendlier than I would have expected after observing him from a distance all these years. But this is ME we’re talking about. I may look different now, but underneath it all I’m still Jem Halliday. And Jem Halliday is definitely not the sort of girl to catch the eye of someone like Lucas Mahoney. Stand me next to Sasha and it’s not even a contest.

But I can’t seem to silence the tiny stupid voice in my head whispering, What if it is true? What would you do then? There’s no doubt that getting in with Lucas would give me more options when it comes to the Plan. Some very interesting options. It’s got to be easier to humiliate someone you’re really close to – especially if they tell you their secrets, their hopes and dreams. Of course, you’d usually care about someone you’re close to, so humiliating them would be the last thing on your mind. But the beauty here is that I don’t care – not even a little bit. I keep coming back to Sasha breaking up with Lucas and him not wanting anyone to know that he was the one who’d been dumped. This useful little nugget of information is firmly lodged in my brain.