Undone(67)

This is far from ideal.

We go back to Lucas’s house straight after school and do it again. And again. He hasn’t said anything, but I can tell he’s surprised. As if boys are the only ones who are allowed to be horny or something. He doesn’t mind though, obviously.

We lie in his bed and talk for a while. He asks a lot of questions about me and my family. Every question he asks leads to another question, and another. It’s like he’s storing up information about me for future use. I’ve never talked about myself so much in my whole life. He must be bored senseless, but he does a good job of pretending to care.

When I’m getting dressed, and hunting under the bed for a rogue sock, he says, ‘I really like talking to you, Jem.’ He’s still lying on the bed, hands behind his head. The duvet is covering him, but only just. Every (straight) girl’s dream.

‘Er … thanks.’ I find the rogue sock and sit down on the bed to put it on. Lucas scoots over and kisses my back, which is bare apart from my bra. Tiny kisses sneaking down my spine, making me shiver. Making me want to jump his bones again. But I can’t. Mum will kill me if I’m not back in time for tea.

He lies back again while I pull on my top. ‘I’m really glad you’re in my life, you know.’

I lean over and kiss him on the lips. The kiss lasts slightly longer than I’d intended.

I leave him lying there after making arrangements for me to come over again tomorrow. As I plod down the stairs, I can’t help thinking about what he said. It was a nice thing to say. It was a nice thing to hear, even from him. And I think he probably expected me to say something back.

I make it home as Mum’s putting dinner on the table. ‘Just in the nick of time!’ she says, smiling. She’s in a good mood. I wonder what sort of mood she’d be in if she knew I’d been shagging Lucas Mahoney half an hour ago.

She asks where I’ve been and I stab a piece of broccoli and stuff it in my mouth to give myself time to think. I really should have thought about this before, but this sneaking-around-with-boys thing is still new to me. I chew the broccoli for longer than broccoli (or anything for that matter) would ever need to be chewed. By the time my mouth is rid of every last trace of food, I have it. ‘I was at the library with Lucas. Study date.’

‘Study date? Well, that’s nice, isn’t it? As long as you actually managed to get some work done and didn’t spend all your time fluttering your eyelashes at him!’ She laughs and Noah laughs too, the little traitor.

I roll my eyes. ‘Mother. Have you ever known me to flutter my eyelashes … ever?’

Noah attempts to flutter his eyelashes; he looks like he’s having an epileptic fit.

Mum tries not to laugh at Noah’s antics, but she can’t help herself. ‘Sorry, love, but anyone can see you’re smitten! You keep staring off into space, you’ve lost your appetite – although you seem to be quite keen on that broccoli. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about … we’ve all been there.’

‘I haven’t!’ Noah says with as much indignation as someone with ketchup smeared around their mouth can muster.

I can feel myself blushing, which is too stupid for words. There’s no point in arguing with her though – that would only make her more convinced of my smittenness.

Mum takes pity on me when Noah starts pointing and laughing about the fact that I’m blushing. She tells him to shut up and start eating. It seems like a good time to inform Mum that I have another ‘study date’ scheduled for tomorrow. ‘Don’t study too hard,’ she says, which makes me wonder if she knows that I’m lying after all. She has that Mum-knows-all look going on. But if she knew I was lying, surely she’d ground me or something? Unless she’s secretly happy that I’m getting laid at long last.

Later in the evening we’re sitting in front of the telly and she says, ‘You know, you and Lucas are perfectly welcome to study here whenever you like.’ I turn to look at her, but she keeps her eyes on the TV. It’s not that she’s smiling, not exactly. There’s just something about the look in her eyes, something about the corner of her mouth that looks like it could twitch into full-on smile mode any minute now. She knows. Balls.





chapter forty-two


Today’s task is Stu. I could have done it sooner, I suppose. But it’ll be all the sweeter now that I’ve laid the groundwork with Nina.

I get up an hour earlier than usual, which is doubly hard because of the terrible night’s sleep I had. I’m leaning against the kitchen counter eating Weetabix and rubbing the sleep out of my eyes by the time Mum comes in. She raises her eyebrows, but says nothing.

I have to make a detour on the way to school. I’d hoped that I’d have what I needed at home – or maybe Dad would have something in his office that I could use. But my requirements are very specific – it has to be exactly right to make an impact.

There’s a big queue in WHSmith – mostly people buying newspapers. The back of the store is pretty empty though, so I take my time choosing my weapon. I buy some other things too – a protractor and some highlighters. I don’t know why I bother, because it’s not like the sales assistant pays me the least bit of attention (except to ask me if I want a half-price bar of Dairy Milk with my purchase). And it’s not like I’m committing a crime or anything. At least … I don’t think it’s a crime. Not that I care either way.