Undone(66)

He jogged over and stood in front of me. ‘Hey.’ His smile really was something else.

‘Hey.’ Good to know I hadn’t been rendered speechless, at least.

He bent down and gave me a quick kiss on the lips. It wasn’t enough. Not even close. I grabbed the front of his T-shirt and pulled him down to me again. This kiss was more satisfactory. This kiss was definitely the kind of kiss you wouldn’t want your parents witnessing.

Lucas settled down next to me and took my hand. ‘Now that’s the kind of welcome a man could get used to.’

I was going to make some snide remark about him calling himself a man but I was distracted by his mouth. I’d never really noticed how utterly perfect it was before. How his lips looked like they were made for kissing. I must have been too busy hating him to notice.

‘Jem? Are you OK? You spaced out for a second there.’

The bell rang and I shook my head, tried to remember where I was and who I was and what lesson I had next. French. Fuck.

I’ve never skived off a lesson in my life. Sure, I’ve pretended to be ill and stayed home once or twice, but I’ve never missed a lesson when I’ve actually been on the premises. The others do it all the time, especially now we’re in sixth form. No one really cares any more – including the teachers. But we had a test, and I’d studied really hard for it. Studying is pretty much the only time I can clear my mind; the only time I’m able to stop thinking about Lucas every two minutes.

I looked at my watch even though I knew full well what time it was. ‘What have you got now?’

‘Free period. Stu’s challenged me to a high-stakes game of pool – although he hasn’t revealed exactly what those stakes are yet. Doesn’t matter though – he’s physically incapable of beating me. I don’t know why he keeps trying. It’s like a fly bashing its head against a windowpane. Kind of pitiful, really.’

I wasn’t really listening; I was looking at his mouth again. Was I really going to do this? One more look at Lucas was enough to confirm that, yes, I was definitely going to do this. I leaned in close to him, whispered in his ear: ‘I think you should postpone that game of pool and think of somewhere we can go right now.’ My lips touched his ear as I spoke.

He pulled away from me so he could see my face. ‘What are you … ? Where do you want to go? I suppose we could go get a coffee or something. Stu can come too. Maybe Nina’s free and we can make it a foursome.’

Clueless. Utterly clueless. Clearly I’d have to be more obvious about my intentions. I leaned in again. ‘That’s not exactly what I had in mind. I meant … somewhere private … so we can …’ I couldn’t bring myself to say it. Surely this was enough for him to catch my drift.

His eyes widened. ‘Ohhhh, you mean you want to … ? Now?’

I nodded, suddenly feeling awkward. Suddenly afraid that he’d reject me and I’d have to pretend I wasn’t all that bothered.

Lucas licked his lips really slowly, and if I hadn’t been feeling so bloody horny the gesture might have made me gag a little bit. ‘I like the way you think.’ His smile was devastating. He glanced around. ‘No sign of Stu, anyway. Let’s get out of here.’ He pulled me to my feet and we hurried out of the common room.

The corridors were empty, which was a relief. I was sure anyone who’d seen us would have known what we were up to straight away. He led me down to the basement corridor – the one I usually try to avoid, since the smell from the boys’ toilets is ten times worse than the science-block toilets. The basement is also home to two geography classrooms and I steer clear of geography whenever possible.

Lucas stopped in front of a red door – a door I’d never noticed before. He ushered me inside and switched on the light. The most unflattering, bright white fluorescent light in the known universe. I glanced around to see rows and rows of shelves filled with exercise books and binders and textbooks. Then I hit the light switch, which made Lucas laugh. There was enough light filtering through the tiny window near the ceiling for us to see what we were doing. I wondered how Lucas knew this room existed, unless he’s been hiding the fact that he’s a secret stationery fiend. (Of course I knew exactly how he knew this room existed, but I didn’t want to kill the mood by giving Sasha a moment’s thought.)

‘I know it’s hardly the Ritz, but beggars can’t be–’ I shut him up by kissing him. I backed him against a table, then he turned us around till I was sitting on the table and he was standing in between my legs.

I silenced the voice in my head that was whispering, This isn’t you. You KNOW this isn’t you, because the voice was wrong. This was me. This is who I am now.

We’ve only been kissing for a minute or two before I start working on Lucas’s belt buckle.

A minute or so later I’m struggling out of the jeans I wish I hadn’t worn. They seem annoyingly reluctant to let me go.

Another minute and I am shagging Lucas Mahoney in the stationery cupboard. Thank Christ he had a condom in his wallet, because I’m really not sure what I’d have done if he hadn’t. Let’s just say I’m relieved the issue didn’t come up.

The sex is good. Really good. Better than before, even. Less self-conscious. He knows how to push all the right … um … buttons.

It’s my first orgasm with a boy. That’s some kind of milestone, I guess. All I know is that I want lots more of them (orgasms, not boys). I’m starting to think this sex thing could become slightly addictive.