Only Child(69)

“He was with us, your uncle and me. We took care of him for a few days so your mom and dad could be just with you,” Aunt Mary said.

“Were they happy they got me?”

“Are you kidding? They were over the moon. You were their special surprise,” Aunt Mary said.

“Because they thought they were only going to have Andy,” I said. Mommy told me that story a lot of times, that they had Andy as their first baby, and then the doctor told them that probably he was going to be their only baby because something happened in Mommy’s body. But then they had me and it was a big surprise.

“You made the family complete,” Aunt Mary said, and she gave me a kiss on top of my head.

We watched Night at the Museum 3, and that’s one of my favorite movies. Aunt Mary didn’t see it yet, and she was laughing really loud. It was funny to watch her, and it helped with the lump in my throat. Aunt Mary took a bunch of pretzels and put them in her mouth, and when something was funny, like when the bad guy’s nose starts melting and it dangles off his face and he doesn’t even notice, she started laughing and pretzel bits came flying out of her mouth and her long earrings jumped up and down.

After the movie, Aunt Mary started to take the pillows off the couch to make a bed for me.

“Aunt Mary?” I said.

“Yes, bud?”

“I think I’m going to be scared here on the couch by myself.”

Aunt Mary stopped taking the pillows off and looked at me. “Oh. Right.”

“I think I want to go home now,” I said.

Aunt Mary came over and got down on her knees in front of me and gave me a hug. She smelled good, like cookies or something. “I know, monkey. But…not tonight, OK? Tonight it would be better if you stayed with me, all right? How can we make you not scared?”

“Maybe I could sleep in your bed?”

“Well, why not! I’ve been sleeping alone for way too long now as it is,” Aunt Mary said, and she got me my own pillow and blanket and put them on her bed next to hers. Her bed wasn’t big like Mommy and Daddy’s, it was small, but it looked comfy.

“Aunt Mary?”

“Yes?”

“I…I sometimes…in the middle of the night I get bad dreams. About the gunman and stuff. And…sometimes I have accidents.” I could feel my whole face starting to get hot when I told her.

“Oh,” Aunt Mary said. “Well, that happens to the best of us, doesn’t it? Here, I have an idea. Don’t you worry now.” She got a big towel out of her closet and put it under the sheet on her bed. “There. No big deal.”

I changed into my PJs, and when I took my pants off, Miss Russell’s angel wing charm fell out of my pocket. When I was getting ready for my sleepover, earlier, after the policeman left and Mommy didn’t stop laughing for a long time, I went in my hideout fast and got out Clancy and the charm because I wanted to bring them with me to Aunt Mary’s house. Now I picked up the charm from the floor and I put it on the little table next to Aunt Mary’s bed.

“What you got there?” Aunt Mary asked.

“It’s a charm that Miss Russell gave me, my teacher,” I told her.

“Can I see it?” Aunt Mary asked, so I gave it to her to look at.

“It’s beautiful,” Aunt Mary said.

“It means love and protection,” I explained. “She got it from her grandma, and it helped her when she got sad, because she remembered that her grandma was still looking out for her even though she’s dead now.”

“And she gave it to you after Andy died?” Aunt Mary asked, and I shook my head yes. “Well, that was very thoughtful of her. I really love it,” Aunt Mary said, and she handed the charm back to me.

Aunt Mary went to bed at the same time as me and at first it was weird that I was lying down so close to her in the small bed, but then I liked it. Lights from the street were coming in so it wasn’t too dark, and Aunt Mary told me some funny stories about Uncle Chip, and we both had to laugh a lot.

“Your uncle was a nut,” Aunt Mary said.

“Do you miss him a lot?” I asked.

“Oh, Zach, I can’t even tell you how much I miss that crazy man. Every day. But I know he’s up there cracking his jokes and mixing things up.” Her voice sounded sad, but like she was smiling, too.

“And taking care of Andy,” I said.

“And taking care of Andy.”

“Do you know our good-night song?” I asked.

“The one Mimi made up?” Aunt Mary asked.

“Yes,” I answered.

“Of course, I love that song! How does your mom sing it again?”

I told her, and then we sang it together a few times, with my name and hers in it.





[ 40 ]


    Moving Away


AFTER TWO SLEEPS at Aunt Mary’s house, Daddy came over. He sat down on Aunt Mary’s couch, and he was like a different person. His whole self looked very tired. His clothes looked messy, and his hair, and he didn’t shave again.

He looked so different, it made me feel shy around him. I stood by the coffee table and looked at my feet, because I didn’t want to look at Daddy’s new self.

“Come sit by me,” Daddy said, and his voice sounded scratchy. He patted his hand on the couch next to him. I went over and I sat down and I noticed that Daddy smelled a little bad. I left a space in between us. Daddy looked at the space and then he looked at my face.