Confessions of a Curious Bookseller(29)
Butterscotch says meow and thank you for the treats.
I am so lucky to have such a caring group of people working for me. Every time I put on these socks, I will think of you.
Happy holidays,
Fawn, Owner
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Mon, Dec 24, 2018 at 4:34 PM
To: Staff
Subject: Inventory
Dear Staff,
I am going to start counting our inventory each month to try to determine if our inventory tracker numbers are correct. I have looked for Finnegans Wake, for example, knowing our inventory tracker says that we have four copies, only to find just one copy on the shelf. Kyle, since you are the head of inventory, I will need you to focus on this task each month. You do not have to count the entire store each month; instead tackle each section, rotating until you get through the whole store, and then start over again. If you have any questions, please come find me. If you require assistance, please recruit Sam or Angela.
Thank you for your understanding in this important matter.
Fawn, Owner
From: Sam Asimov
Sent: Mon, Dec 24, 2018 at 5:13 PM
To: Fawn Birchill, Staff
Re: Inventory
Hi Fawn,
Just being honest here, and I mean this respectfully, but we’ve all witnessed you give books away to customers, friends, and family regularly. Could that possibly be the issue?
Sam
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Mon, Dec 24, 2018 at 5:23 PM
To: Staff
Re: Inventory
Sam,
I appreciate your input, but though in the past I have given books away to foster loyalty and build relationships with my customers, I have always made it my top priority to correctly check the book out of the inventory log. The numbers have been off for years, so either we have little gnomes running around stealing books and using them as kindling, or someone here or possibly our customers are little thieves.
Fawn, Owner
From: Sam Asimov
Sent: Mon, Dec 24, 2018 at 5:50 PM
To: Fawn Birchill, Staff
Re: Inventory
Hi Fawn,
I think if you caught us doing what you do, you’d call it stealing and fire us immediately.
Respectfully,
Sam
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Mon, Dec 24, 2018 at 6:07 PM
To: Staff
Re: Inventory
Sam,
I do not believe that my actions constitute stealing since it is my own store, and therefore it is acceptable for me to give away a book now and then.
Fawn, Owner
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Tue, Dec 25, 2018 at 9:05 AM
To: Tabitha Birchill
Subject: Christmas
Dear Mother,
As I sit here in my drafty apartment on Christmas Day, I wish I had instead taken the train out to see you. You must be so lonely without Father, though I think Florence is going to visit with her brood?
Thank you so much for the ribbon candy, the nonpareils, the fuzzy socks, and the Shakespeare mug. You have been so generous this year, as always.
There is something romantic and whimsical about being alone on Christmas. At the moment I am listening to Chopin, drinking peppermint tea, and sitting on the floor near my small tree watching Butterscotch bat the wrapping paper around. I am reminded of one childhood Christmas when Father bought me a children’s easel and drew Santa on the first page. He was always such a great artist. I believed with all my heart that it was Santa who drew himself and wished me a merry Christmas. Or there was the time Father collected deer droppings from the woods, sprinkled them on the kitchen floor, and told us that Rudolph had been inside (though the evidence was swiftly eaten by the dog). And while, if you can remember, Florence began to cry at Rudolph’s blatant disregard for decency, I was instead blown away by the idea and managed to believe in Santa for at least another three years. These things you did for us as parents make me want to keep the Christmas spirit alive, even to this day. On days such as Christmas I wish I had children of my own, though it is a passing fancy. I have neither the patience nor the necessary hip width to bear motherhood.
Speaking of, the young Irishman did not work out. I had to break up with him, though we parted on amicable terms. I won’t divulge the reasons, as they are strictly personal. I will simply ask: Why are all the crazy ones so beautiful? That said, he has whetted my desire to find a male companion. Next time, however, I will be far more careful!
Merry Christmas,
Fawn
From: Angela Washington
Sent: Tue, Dec 25, 2018 at 11:09 AM
To: Fawn Birchill
Subject: Thank you!
Hi Fawn,
Thanks for the nice Christmas card and the fifty bucks! Whoa! Definitely wasn’t expecting this—not because it was from you. I mean it was just really special to get.
Thanks!!
—A
From: Sam Asimov
Sent: Tue, Dec 25, 2018 at 5:04 PM
To: Fawn Birchill
Subject: Thanks for the card and the money
Fawn,
Thank you very much for the card and the money. I hope you had a memorable Christmas.
Sam
From: Kyle Krazinsky
Sent: Tue, Dec 25, 2018 at 11:23 PM
To: Fawn Birchill
Subject: [No Subject]
Hey Fawn,
You’re the best. You did not have to do this, but know it was appreciated. I went out for Chinese with the money today and have some left over for booze.