Don't Let Me Fall(79)

walking over to the door and throwing my arms around him to kiss him.

“I never want to see you again,” I spat, throwing my other leg outside. I climbed down the house like I always did when I was younger and crept around the house until my heels hit

the sidewalk. I walked in the shadows with my arms crossed over my chest as I tried to keep myself warm.

I made it near Jon’s house when I saw him and Adam walking toward a car. Victor was driving. I jogged up to them and faked a smile.

“Are you going anywhere special?” I asked. “Christmas party? Bar? f-uck some girls?”

“Do you want to come?” Adam asked opening the door.

I smiled and got in. They didn’t complain or ask what is wrong so I didn’t bring it up. I sat in the car and watched Jon watch me every few seconds from the side mirror.

I know it’s not the right thing to do but Logan lied to me. He used me. He took advantage of me. My family made him be with me. I’m done with him and everything that involves him.

I caught Jon’s eye and winked at him.

He smiled and looked away.

Yeah, I’m not thinking of killing myself. I’m thinking about being the old Rebeckah. The one that f*cks everyone. Logan did help me but he broke me just as much. I won’t kill

myself over a guy or what he did to me. I won’t kill myself over Logan.

It’s my birthday in six hours.

I’m going to forget about everything and have fun. I’m going to be the Rebeckah that has been hiding for eight months.

I’m going to be the Rebeckah my family lost and wanted back.



- 17 -



I should have never gotten in the car with Victor because Aimee called him and he caved five seconds later. She asked if I was with him. I pinched him and gave him the death stare

but he gave me puppy-dog eyes and said yes. That wasn’t it. We drove up to a club and the second we passed the long line, Aimee was there. With Logan.

“Rebeckah, just hear me out. It’s not–”

I shoved Logan out of my way and walked into the crowded area, pushing my way through dancing bodies. I should have known Victor would have driven here. Aimee told him to come.

A hand snaked around my wrist and pulled me back.

“Just listen!” Logan yelled over the music. “I wanted to tell you. I wanted to get it out in the open the day Victor came by but you fell asleep and…it was your mom’s funeral.

I didn’t have the heart to do it.”

“Victor knows?” I asked, feeling utterly betrayed. I remember that night. He came in talking about a deal. He knows. And he didn’t tell me!

My eyes found Logan’s and I growled as I pushed him away from me. I can’t believe I growled but it came out. Logan grabbed my hands and pushed me against him.

“I’m sorry but your father was worried about you,” he said, his eyes trying to plead with me. “I wanted to tell you but I couldn’t.”

I grabbed his hands and leaned into him.

“It’s what you didn’t say that ended this,” I said dryly. “Go home.”

I pushed on his chest lightly and walked away.

As much as I hate him right now, I want to cry in the bathroom and let him hold me. I’m a f-ucking pathetic girl. And I have a heart. Ugh!

He can go back to Maryland. I don’t want him here.

I found Victor ordering a drink at the bar. He took one look at me and turned around. My fingers grabbed his shirt and I pulled him into a private corner.

“How did you find out?” I snapped.

He went wide-eyed and stared at his drink for a few seconds before looking up at me and saying, “Adam and I were walking by your house when your brother and Finn walked out. We

followed them and Logan’s name came out. I made them talk.” Can this get any better? “I went by Logan’s place to tell him to stop it because you’re not in the place for

bullshit. He said he was going to tell you but he needed time.”

I rolled my eyes and walked away.

I’m sick of people hiding shit from me. They want me to bear my soul to them but they can hide important details from me. It’s not fair!

I let the music drown out everyone’s voice. Whenever I saw anyone coming near me, I turned and moved to a new spot. Grinding against drunk men is just as fun as it used to be. Al

should be proud. I’m me again. She’s the only person who accepted me the way I was.

As I got my ass rubbed against someone’s hard-on, my eyes found Jon, drinking a beer. I straightened up and let the hands on my hips fall. The guy behind me told me to come back

but my legs kept moving until I was standing in front of him.

“Do something for me,” I said grabbing the hand holding Jon’s beer, not once breaking eye contact.

“Anything,” Jon said eyeing me up and down.

“Be with me for my birthday.”

His eyes held mine as his lips dropped into a line.

“What?” he asked. I gave him a look. He heard me. I don’t have to repeat myself. “Becka, you’re with Logan.”

I shook my head as I stepped closer. “Not anymore,” I said into his ear. I slid my hand up his arm and stopped at his neck. “Are you going to deny the birthday girl her only

present?” It’s pathetic how I’m acting. But this is me. It’s who I always was.