Losing Him (Mitchell Family #8)(11)

I hadn’t been to church with my mother in a long time. Even when I visited, I stayed away. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to attend Sunday service. I just didn’t want to run into Ty and his family. Miranda hated me. I’d had nightmares of her shooting me in the back of the church. I deserved to fear her, for obvious reasons, but I never meant to put her life in danger. I’d never physically harm a child. It made me sick to think about.

Jessie caught my attention, breaking my train of thought and getting me out of my pity party. I’d made my bed and I was going to have to live in it, alone.

Jacob walked up to me and grabbed my hand. “Mommy, can I say goodbye to Nana now?”

I looked up and saw that the casket was being opened. My heart stopped when I saw the top of my mother’s face peeking out. I had to be strong, except I didn’t know how to do it. I didn’t know how to say goodbye.

Chapter 6


Jessie


Heather was in rare form. She couldn’t even take the steps up there to see her mother’s body. People were starting to arrive, Jacob was getting antsy, and she just stood there like a statue. I tried my best to be supportive, but had no idea what I was supposed to say to her.

I’d let my better judgment go out the door and had sex with her, after I’d promised myself that it was never going to happen again. One minute I was sure I was done with her then the next I was right back in it. Obviously, my attraction to her hadn’t gone away. Her beauty was a drug that I couldn’t get off of.

Her being so emotional didn’t help with my wanted to severe ties. It made me feel guilty, like I was abandoning her when she legitimately needed me the most.

As the room started filling with people, I realized that I was going to have to do something, otherwise they’d be approaching Heather, who refused to speak. I leaned in and whispered in her ear. “Babe, they’re starting to come in. I’m not going to leave you, but you’re going to have to talk to people.”

She gave me the look of fear, like I was asking her to cut off her leg. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Since I didn’t know any of these people, I had no clue what to say or do.

Thankfully, a nice looking brunette came walking up to us. She smiled at me and tapped on Heather’s shoulder. She turned around and just looked at her for a second, before starting to cry again. The brunette hugged her and patted her on the back. “I know it’s hard. I’m so sorry for you, Heather.”

Heather finally pulled away and looked at the brunette. “Thank you for coming, Van. I never expected it.”

She grabbed Heather’s hand. “Last year, you gave me advice about cancer. I told you about it before I even told my husband. I didn’t know how I was going to make it through those treatments, but I did it. Your mother was a wonderful woman who fought a long battle. You have to know that she’s no longer in pain.”

Heather nodded. I was still in disbelief that another member of the Mitchell family was being nice to her. “I know. I feel horrible for not being here when it happened. She was all alone. I will never forgive myself for that.”

I stood there watching the two of them talk as if they were longtime friends. Finally I couldn’t stand being left out. I interrupted them mid-sentence. “Excuse me, I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Jessie.”

The girl named Van looked at me and smiled. “Oh Amy told me she met you earlier today.”

Heather’s mouth dropped and I could tell that I was going to have to explain. I almost wished that I hadn’t butted in on their conversation. “Yeah. She’s was nice. So, do you live here in town?” I tried to play it off like I didn’t know she lived in Kentucky.

“No, I flew in with my family this morning. My mother and Heather’s mother have known each other for years. Heather and I have known each other since we were little girls. When something tragic like this happens, it makes all of the adolescent drama not so important. Miss Kat was a member of our community and church. Being a cancer survivor myself, it’s important that I’m here to celebrate her life.”

“I never expected you to come, Van. You didn’t have to.”

“It’s the twins birthday this weekend, so it wasn’t like we weren’t coming anyway. I just changed my flight to a couple days sooner. Besides, my mother was already planning on coming.” Van looked up at the alter. “How did they do with her makeup?”

Heather shrugged. “I haven’t been able to go look. It will make it real and I don’t think I’m ready to face that yet. I don’t want to say goodbye to her. She hasn’t even been gone that long and I feel like I can’t go on without her.” She started bawling, burying her face into my chest. I held her close and looked over at Van.

She looked like she honestly felt bad for Heather. A woman, with some resemblance to her, came up behind her. I could tell it was her mother. She stood there and finally reached out to touch Heather on the arm. “Are you okay?”

“Not really. I always hated these things.” Heather admitted.

“Focus on the people that are here, instead of what’s in the casket. Mingle and chat with your mom’s friends, keeping your mind off of it. When you’re ready, you’ll know it. It will get easier.” Her mother was very assuring.

Heather managed to smile. “Thanks, Mrs. Tate.”