Because (Seven Year Itch #4)(16)

She’s the candy I couldn’t have as a kid. She’s the danger I was told to stay away from. I’m blown away by how I feel when I’m inside of her. As I struggle with my own conscience, she releases one of my hands and shoves hers down my shorts. It’s cold as it grips my cock. A chill strikes me, though her kisses soothe it away. She’s getting in to it. I feel her pushing me so she’s able to climb on top of me. I shove her shirt up until she lifts both hands to free it from her body. She unfastens the back of her bra and I toss it away, silently wondering why she’s kept it on in the first place. I cup both of her supple tits, pinching her nipples until I hear a tiny whimper escape her. She’s rocking her body overtop of me, content on letting this happen between us. These past couple of days are the most we’ve been intimate in months, but it only reminds me why it’s been happening. We only f*ck when we fight. This is how we solve things. Intimately, in bed, naked.

I try to force her to let me on top. I need to flip her over and have my way. She grits her teeth and holds her position. “No. Not this time, Bran.”

“Why?” I ask.

“Because, I want you to look at me. You need to look into my eyes this time.”

I get off so much easier when I’m behind her. It’s better. It’s tight and I like the way it feels when I use her hips to hold on to, but I’m content with this, at least at first.

I haven’t been inside of her in a while. I watch her stand up over me and take off her pants and underwear. There’s nothing sexy about it. In an instant she’s naked and waiting for me to remove my boxers. I shove them down and let her get them off my ankles. Her cold hands run over my knees and up my thighs. I know where she’s headed, and I’m not going to stop her. I love the way my dick looks when it’s surrounded by her plump lips. She licks from the base, her eyes watching me the entire way. My cock jumps and she moans. She takes one tit and rubs the nipple over the head. I don’t know which one of us likes this more. I groan and stare as she raises her breast to suck between her own teeth. I throw my head back, unable to watch without wanting to cum all over her pretty face. She knows this makes me crazy, so she does it again, finally coming up to kiss my lips. This side of her is rarely seen. She thinks I’m not attracted to her, but it’s dark and she’s more open this way. That’s why I always turn off the light. I know she’ll give me her all if I do.

I can feel her * taunting me. She’s wet, because it’s not ripping my skin. Instead, it slides. She’s positioning me without touching it. I use my hands to grab her tits and pull them close. I need to suck on her rock hard nipples until she cries out. I use my teeth and yank back. She licks her lips and leans forward until her tongue is brushing over mine and her nipple. If I was already inside of her she’d come apart, so I don’t waste anymore time. This is enough foreplay. I jerk my groin and wait for her to slowly lower herself onto my cock. We both makes sounds as I fill her walls. She’s tight, yet soaked with anticipation. I keep playing with her tits, pinching her nipples and watching her lick each of them. She’s riding me with precision, but I need more. I lift my ass off the bed and signal I want it rough. I slap on her left ass cheek and feel her pace increasing. She’s riding me like a wild stallion and I love it. Our bodies are slapping together, she’s so wet I can feel it running down my balls. My hands take hold of her hips and I work against her rhythm. The friction sends her over the edge. She falls against my chest and we kiss hard, like she’s hungry for it. Her tongue teases mine. She’s not letting me have it, so I fight harder. When she gives in I feel her walls pushing me out. She’s coming undone and it’s turning me on. I want to fill her with all the animosity I have built up. I hold her as it begins to happen. I need her to stop moving so I can handle it. She moves gently anyway and I explode.

Normally she’ll get up and grab a towel or a shirt to put between her legs to sleep, but she doesn’t move. Instead she cries again, except this time I can’t ask her to stop. I feel like I’ve failed. Being intimate hasn’t helped her cope. It’s only made it worse.

Now I feel like shit again, and I know a round two won’t help, so I hold her tight and let her get it out. I imagine this being the last time we’re together and it bothers me. I shouldn’t have told her to leave. It’s not what I want, not entirely.

Forced to be a family, I’ve done my best without losing every part of me I recognize. That’s my wife’s problem. She’s not the same person, not in any way.

The person sleeping next to me is like a stranger who snuck her way into my bed. It hurts me knowing I don’t like who she’s become, because I know the old Shayla would have been someone I could appreciate being around.

She wants to dominate me, but I won’t allow it. I can’t. I refuse to change from the man she fell in love with.

Before I can fall back asleep I head into the kitchen and pull a piece of paper off the grocery list so I can jot down a note for her to find in the morning. She needs to know when I get home tonight we’re going to sit down and figure this out. I’m done waiting for it to magically happen on its own.

Shayla,

I don’t want to fight anymore. We have to talk about this like adults. No more fighting. No more makeup sex. I’m willing to listen.

When I get home from work we’re going to sit down and talk about this. We owe it to Ab, and to ourselves.