Because (Seven Year Itch #4)(20)

I shrug. “Because I don’t want you to leave. Isn’t that enough?” I wait for her response, though I already know it’s not what I want to hear.

“No. Not anymore. I’m sorry,” she says as she stands and puts her purse over her shoulder. She waves for Aberdeen to come back to the table. It’s obvious she’s not happy she has to stop playing in the germ infested tubes.

“How long do you think this will last?”

“Bran, I don’t know, and I’m done talking about it. I need time.”

“How much time?”

Her apprehension scares me. She shrugs but won’t answer.

“So you’re leaving me? That’s how it’s going to be? We’re done? All the years of bickering and you pick today to leave? What triggered it? What did I do that was the last straw? How am I supposed to fix this?”

“You can’t. This should have happened a long time ago, but I kept telling myself it would get better. It’s not getting better. I’m tired of holding out hope that you’ll change. I’m sick of hating the way I feel about myself. You want reasons, there you go. There’s two good reasons why I’m not giving in. We’re done discussing this tonight, Bran. The damage is done. Our daughter is coming back, so put on a happy face like we’re okay.”

I’m clenching my jaw to keep my thoughts at bay. She still hasn’t told me what triggered this. Not even twenty four hours before we were in bed together, and now she’s about to walk out of my life like she doesn’t give a damn about me. If she’s trying to hurt me it’s working.

Shayla fixes Aberdeen’s hair when she gets back to the table. She leans down and kisses our daughter before looking back at me. I hate how she’s acting like everything is okay, as if we’ve agreed to this separation. She wants me to put on a brave face and pretend I’m content. I don’t know if I can look into my daughter’s eyes and lie to her. It’s not right.

Shayla keeps her cool as she speaks again, but I can tell she’s about to fall apart. I’ve seen that look before. She’s fighting tears, and it’s only a matter of time before she loses it. “I’m going to go since you’re here. Do you need me to come by to put her on the bus in the morning or do you think you can manage it on your own?”

My brow furrows. I’m pissed she thinks I can’t take care of our daughter without her help. “You don’t have to come by. I can handle it.” I want to prove to her that I’m capable. She thinks I’m worthless, so it’s important I show her I’m not.

“Good. I’ll pick her up like I did today and we’ll figure out where she wants to stay tomorrow night and so on. I’m sure after a few weeks we’ll be able to come up with a schedule that works for us both without having to get the courts involved.”

Wait a minute. She’s talking like she knows she’s not coming back. Weeks? Is she seriously going along with this idea of hers? Is my wife leaving me for good? I’m not happy about this, and it’s probably flashing across my face like a neon sign. “If that’s what you think is best.”

She nods. “It is.” Shayla manages to give me another fake smile. I can see that she’s about to break down. It’s killing me not to be able to take her in my arms and make the pain go away, even when I know I’m the reason.

“I love you.” It comes out sudden, but exactly at the right time. “You know where to find us.”

She walks out of the restaurant abruptly. I grit my teeth and avoid eye contact with Aberdeen for a few seconds to control my emotions. This is like a kick to the balls. How am I supposed to act like nothing is wrong around my child when I have no idea what the hell is going to happen? If my wife doesn’t change her mind, what am I supposed to do? Does she expect to move on? Is there someone already in her life?

I’m hurt. It’s sudden and unexpected. I’m going to need time to figure out what I want to do to save my family. Right now I’ll give her the space she requires, but I can’t hold out forever. I refuse to. I’m a man with needs, and after seven years of sticking around, I feel like she owes me more than a quick goodbye.





Chapter 10




I don’t even make it to my car before I break down. I stand in the middle of the parking lot with my hands covering my face. I feel like I can’t hold my weight up, so I make a dash for the driver’s side door. I manage to climb in my vehicle, start it up, and pull around to the back of a hardware store so Brandon and Aberdeen don’t see me when they leave the restaurant. Then I sob like I’m watching everything I love slip away from me. In so many ways I’m taking that risk.

I feel like this is a mistake. Brandon showed up to be with us. He could have met me where I asked him and I wouldn’t have been angry. He’s clearly proving he can be the man I need him to be, but I know it’s only a temporary fix. He’s only doing this because he’s scared. It doesn’t mean anything has changed, it only shows me he’s capable. It proves I’m right. When Brandon wants something he’ll do whatever it takes. Clearly, he hasn’t wanted to save our relationship for a very long time. He’s settled. We’ve been living in a monotonous circle.

I’m doing this for us. I’m not being selfish. I can’t take anything for granted. This is my life, and in my heart I’m determined to repair it.