Indefinite (Salvation #6)(12)

Me: Catherine has a big mouth.





Gretchen: I’m sure she assumed you told me already.





Me: Probably. Guess what?





Gretchen: What?





Me: I have big news! I’m going to get pregnant without a man present for it.





Gretchen is the most pragmatic one of us. If anyone is going to understand, it’s her.



Gretchen: Wow! That’s big news! So glad you told me before I heard about it from someone else. Now that I got that out of the way . . . I’m happy for you. Did you pick the lucky guy yet?





That’s the part I’m dreading. The whole browsing the book thing is unappealing. I almost wish she would pick for me. That’s not a bad idea, actually.

I head out of the apartment and make my way to the elevator while sending her another message.



Me: No, can you come for a visit this week or next?





Gretchen: I’m sure I could come up. My mother is up my ass about not visiting before the wedding, why?





Me: I need you to find my baby daddy. Lots of lists and pro and con columns.





Gretchen: Oh, this is the best gift you’ve ever given me.





Her and her lists. I swear, this girl needs a support group focused on curbing the need to make them and check them two hundred thousand times.



Me: You’re welcome. See you soon!





Gretchen: Yes! And prepare for a list of questions in your email today.





Shocking. Another list.

I make it to the first floor and out the door without seeing Quinn. My leaving early was a fabulous idea if I do say so myself. Usually, I don’t roll into work until later in the day because we don’t see patients until the afternoons on Mondays. Not that I ever actually see patients, but I like that I get to take my time most Mondays.

Today, not so much.

I put my earbuds in and start to walk. This is what I love about New York City, the air. Sure, it’s filled with smog and God knows what else, but I can just breathe when I’m here. While I’m on a street with thousands of people, I can feel completely alone. The rap music blares in my ears as I sing along in my head.

Blocks pass by, and I’m jamming out without a care in the world.

I turn to cross to the other side of the street, and a hand wraps around my arm, pulling me back and against someone’s chest.

“Hey!” I protest and turn to give the asshole a piece of my mind, until I see who the hell it is.

Quinn pulls the headphone from my ear as my heart begins to race. “You almost got yourself killed.”

“What?”

“You didn’t even look at that car that was turning and almost ran you over.”

Confused, I look around, see the two people staring at me, and then look over to the car that’s flying down the street.

Shit.

“Well, thank you, but you can release me now.”

Quinn’s hand tightens slightly, pulling me even closer to his body. “I should, but I don’t want to.”

“You’ve done it often enough that you should be a pro by now.”

He sighs. “Maybe I’ve learned my lesson.”

I have to remember all of the shit I’ve been through with him. My resistance to him has never been strong, but I’m going to have to hold on to the little I have. He and I don’t want the same things, and there’s no way to change that.

He wants war and guns and the adrenaline rush from whatever the hell he does. There will never be a merging where we stand.

“Are you still in the navy?” I ask.

“Yes.”

“Did you reenlist?”

His eyes fill with sadness. “I had the papers drawn.”

So, that’s a yes. He’s going to do it, just hasn’t yet.

“Do you ever plan to give it up, get married, have kids, or love anyone?”

His fingers start to loosen. “No, maybe, I hope, and I already do.”

I shake my head and step back. We are not doing this. I am not going to believe that this time is any different. I take the earbud back from him and put it into my ear, letting the angry rap music fuel me. “We’re done. Go back to Virginia.”

As much as I’d like to believe he’s going to do any of that, he won’t. Quinn is determined, and apparently, I’m on the list of things to conquer.

I just have to ignore him and hope he surrenders before I do.





“So he’s there? In New York?” Catherine asks as I sit in the bathroom stall, trying to get my head together.

“Yup.”

She laughs. “Well, I can’t say I’m surprised.”

“He always does this, Cat!” I look at her on the screen as she wipes her eyes. I woke her and don’t even feel bad about it. She’s the only person who will understand. She walked away from Jackson once.

“You and I both know that these guys are determined when they realize they fucked up.”

Jackson’s head lifts, and he stares into the camera. “You do know it’s early here?”