Effortless (Thoughtless, #2)(157)

I looked back at him and he smiled wider. “I have to go soon.” It was only then that I noticed that he was already wearing his jacket, and his hair was slightly damp around the edges from a recent shower. Wow, I guess I’d been exceptionally tired. Breaking up will do that to you.

I sat up, sloshing a bit of coffee over my mug. “Well, I’ll get ready. I’ll come with you.”

Rescuing my cup from my frantic hands, Kellan set it on the nightstand and shook his head at me. “No, I want you to stay here and relax.” I frowned at him and he smiled. “Every separation between us seems to be long and dramatic, like we’re never going to see each other again.” He ran the back of his knuckle over my cheek. “It’s like we’re…savoring every moment because we both think it might be the last.” I bit my lip and nodded; I’d had those same thoughts. Kellan grinned, seeing my agreeance. “So, let’s break out of that cycle.” Inhaling deep, he sat up straighter. “Goodbye, sweetheart. I have to go to work.” Grinning at him, I shrugged. “See ya.”

Laughing at me, he shook his head and leaned in for a kiss. “Keep the bed warm for me,” he murmured against my mouth. I was giggling when he pulled away. “I’ll call you when I land.” 443



I nodded. As if on cue, his phone in his jacket chirped. I glanced at his pocket and raised an eyebrow. Kellan rolled his eyes and sighed. Pulling his phone out, he glanced at the number. “That would be my father with his morning message.” He raised an eyebrow at me. “There will be an afternoon and an evening one, I’m sure.”

He hit the end button without even reading it. I frowned. “Don’t you even read them?”

Sniffling, he put his phone back in his pocket. “No. I never read them and I never respond.” Lowering his head, he glanced up at me. “That’s why I freaked out when you were going to. I don’t want him to be…encouraged.” He looked up at me fully. “I want him to stop.” I bit my lip, hard, wanting to object but knowing that Kellan wasn’t going to budge on the matter, and he’d get mad if I started in on him again. I nodded, then a question slipped out without my permission.

“What does your sister think about you ignoring him?” Kellan sighed and moved to sit on the bed beside me. “She thinks I’m being stubborn. She doesn’t understand why I’m hurting him by refusing to…” He stopped talking and pulled his phone back out. “She asks me to give him a chance, every time I talk to her.”

“Wise girl,” I muttered.

Kellan heard me and lifted an eyebrow. Not wanting to start an argument, I held out my hand for the phone. “Can I read it?” Kellan narrowed his eyes and I quickly added, “I won’t respond,” I shrugged, “but I feel like someone should at least read them.” Kellan pondered it for a moment, then slowly gave me his phone. I wanted to jump for joy at the level of trust he’d just shown me. Maybe there was hope for us yet. Not wanting to betray that trust, I held the phone in one hand, found my way to his inbox and opened the missed message. Then I held the phone in my palm, all of my text-writing digits away from the device.

444



I read the message Kellan refused to, and tears stung my eyes. ‘Please, talk to me today. There’s so much I need to tell you.’

Biting my lip, I flipped to another. ‘I know you’re angry, but please don’t shut me out.’

And another. ‘I can be a part of your life, if you let me. Please call me.’

I flipped to a few more and they were all similar—I need to talk to you, please call me, I want to explain—and even one, near the end of the saved messages on Kellan’s phone, that read, ‘I regret leaving. Let me make it up to you…son.’

I had to wipe away a tear at that one. It was the message dated Christmas morning. If Kellan had just let me read it…all these months of secrets and held-back truths wouldn’t have happened. Things between Kellan and I wouldn’t have been nearly as strained.

Seeing my reaction, Kellan whispered, “What…what did he say?” Sighing, I shook my head and handed him the phone. He didn’t look at it as he put it in his pocket. “He just wants a chance to explain. He wants to get to know you.” I placed my hand on his cheek. “He regrets leaving you, Kellan.”

Kellan’s eyes misted and he nodded. Swallowing a couple of times, he stood up. “I should get going.”

Staring up at him, at the moody, gorgeous, soulful man that he was, I smiled and hoped he’d let his father in…one day. Appearing deep in thought, Kellan was halfway through the door when I called his name.

He looked back at me sprawled on his bed, naked under the light sheet that I had wrapped around my torso, and smiled contently.

“I just wanted to wish you luck on the end of your tour, and tell you…” I bit my lip and he smiled wider. Seeing the happiness, even under his current confusion, I giggled. “I’ll be here when you get back.” I motioned with my eyes to indicate his house.

445



His line of sight followed mine and he beamed at me. Taking a step back into the room, he asked, “You’re moving back in with me?” I nodded, giggling more as I wrapped my arms around my knees. I’d sort of decided that the moment he’d left, but recent events had…solidified the decision. He shook his head at me, then took off his jacket. I stared at him, confused, as he stripped his shirt off and then started unbuttoning his jeans.