Don't Let Me Fall(51)

and surprised Toby. He said he was planning something with his secret boyfriend but since we never met the guy, we told him to ditch him. It was f*cked up because it was Christmas

so Toby’s revenge was making me get a four-leaf clover. We all got it. Toby got his on his right wrist (mainly for hand jobs), Alice got it on her ankle (it was her first so she

was scared) and I got mine on my left side where it would blend in with my other tattoos.

“The meaning behind it is, ‘f-uck me, I’m Irish,’” I said.

“Whoa!” Aimee said stopping at the table. “You better not f-uck anyone at this table. Scoot over,” she said to Juan. I scooted down and Juan did the same for Aimee to fit. “You

’re Irish?” she asked me.

“No, Becka just has a four-leaf clover on her side for no reason,” Shaun smirked. “Except to mind-f-uck men.”

“Did I hear ‘f-uck men’?” Darren asked sliding into the tiny spot beside Shaun. This booth will break if anyone else sits here.

“I knew you were gay,” Caleb said walking up to the table with Logan. “This is f*cked up. I’m a guest and I don’t even have a seat.”

“Aimee can sit on your lap,” Logan said, pouting. “I’m more concerned about me.”

“Are you oblivious to the fact of a beautiful tattooed girl being squeezed to death next to Juan?” Darren asked, glancing at me and winking. “You can sit on my lap if you want.”

I couldn’t help but laugh when I saw the look Logan gave him. I shook my head and glanced outside, and my heart stopped.

“f-uck me,” I breathed.

“Are you sure?” Darren asked. “I told you, man. She wants me.”

“What? No. I wasn’t talking to you,” I said.

I glanced outside again and he was gone. Was I hallucinating? I must have been. He wouldn’t be here. What the f-uck would he be here for in the first place?

I pressed my head against the window and tried to look past walking students. He’s not here. Of course.

What would Toby Williams be doing here?

Get a grip, Becka. You’re going crazy.

“It’s so weird to see you with clothes on.”

I. Just. Died.

My head slowly turned to see the person standing beside Logan. He’s not real. He’s not standing right there.

God, why are you doing this to me?!

He looks like Alice. The brownish-green eyes are the same. The dark hair. The cheekbones. Toby’s gay and proud, only he doesn’t look it. He looks like the kind of guy that goes to

the gym to hit on women and f-uck them in the showers.

“I’m sorry?” Logan asked turning to him.

f-uck, he’s real.

My heart is beating way too fast and I feel like I’m going to faint. Pass out. Die. Something.

“Can we talk?” Toby asked me.

Aimee took one look at me and saw something in my face. In the look of my eyes. I don’t know, she saw something. “Look, I don’t know who you are but Becka doesn’t want to talk

to you,” she said, giving Toby a look to even dare question her. “And if you were a one time thing then I’m sorry to break it to you but it was only that. A one time thing.” Oh,

thanks.

Toby laughed softly and pulled up the sleeves of his sweater, revealing far more tattoos then he had since I last saw him. Holy shit, when did he get those? “I can stay here all

day, Becka,” he said placing his hands on his hips. “Your dad even told me where you work.”

“No, he didn’t,” I panicked. He wouldn’t do that. He knows I’m having a hard time hearing Toby’s name so I imagine what he thinks will happen by seeing Toby.

“Okay, he didn’t but I have my ways. It’ll be five minutes. That’s all I need.” That’s far too long.

I tore my eyes off of him and stared at the table. I felt the tears coming and I tried to hold them back but it was pointless. He’s bringing back too many feelings. Happy ones. Sad

ones. Perfect ones.

“I think you should go,” Logan said.

Yes, thank you. That’s what he needs to do.

“Are you Becka’s latest f-uck buddy?” Toby barked. My head snapped up and my eyes widened. He better not say anything. I don’t care if I’m a whore but still, he doesn’t have

to say shit. “Don’t get your feelings involved, man. She’ll just leave when the next thing comes around.”

“Shut up, Toby!” I snapped.

“Oh, now you acknowledge me,” he said.

“What the f-uck are you even doing here?” I asked.

“I live around here.” Oh f-ucking awesome. I came back home with hopes of never having to be put through the shit I was back in Washington. Now I know he lives around here. “You

’d know if you called or texted or did something other than lose contact. And I can’t believe I have to talk to you through your dad. That’s just f*cked up.”

“Things are different now,” I said through my teeth.

“People go through shit all the time, Becka. They don’t give up on people who are like family.” There are hundreds of things I can say about that, number one being his parents