Don't Let Me Fall(48)

My breath caught as he said that. It’s like he’s in my head. Like he knows what I’m thinking. Feeling.

“I’m pretty sure I’m worth less than something on the dollar menu.” My eyes widened when the words left my mouth. It slipped out. I didn’t mean to say it.

Logan found my eyes in the dark and I want to hide in my sweater. I want to crawl out of this car and never see him again because I know he’s going to say something that will make

me feel worth something.

“You are the person people wish they can have nearby. Talk to. Be with. You’re special, Rebeckah. I wish you can see that in yourself because once you do, you’ll see just how

truly amazing you are,” he said, making sure I heard every word.

His thumb caressed my cheek, wiping away the escaped tears. One broke through and slid right to my lips. Maybe Logan saw it. Maybe he didn’t. But he kissed me anyways. And it felt

sooo good.

“I’m so glad I met you,” he breathed.

“I’m so glad you won me that bear.”

He broke into a laugh as he went back to his seat. We had a moment and I kind of ruined it with the bear but it doesn’t matter. The bear did this to me. Logan did this to me.

I actually feel something.

And my pounding heart feels the same way.

Logan pulled up to my dad’s house and we ended the night just like most first dates. We stood at the front door talking about how much fun today was.

Logan leaned in to kiss me.

Then the front door opened and Kelsey squealed.

“Ohmygod! You got the bear!” she said, beaming until she saw our faces. “Oh…did I just interrupt something?”

“No!” Matty snapped, walking up to her. “It’s late.” He gave us a look and he actually smirked at Logan. “Bye, Logan.”

“What are you doing?” I asked raising an eyebrow. “I’m not a child. I’m not your child.”

“Get your ass upstairs,” Matty said smiling at me.

When I didn’t move, he grabbed my arm and pulled me inside, the bear almost slipping out of my arms and falling onto the ground. He closed the door after telling Logan to go home

then steered me toward the kitchen.

“Seriously, Matty, that was f-ucking rude,” I said. “You can’t slam a door in his face and act like Dad.” This is ridiculous. And I’m not dealing with this the way I should. I

’m f-ucking pissed. “It’s only nine. And I’m twenty-one!”

“You were gone all day. We were worried,” Matty said.

And then I saw their faces.

I didn’t text them. I didn’t call.

Shit. They thought something happened.

“I’m sorry,” I said, dropping my eyes to the floor and tightening my arms around the bear. “I know I’ve been acting weird for awhile but I’m not…I don’t…” I hate to talk

about these things with my family. Especially with my younger siblings. “I’m not thinking about suicide,” I whispered. I looked up at them and smiled. Shit. I know why I’m not

thinking about it. “Logan helps me.” I hate admitting it but it’s true.

They didn’t say anything but I knew by the look in their eyes, they were happy. I’m not that crazy anymore. That’s a good thing.

“Where’s Dad?” I asked.

“On a date with someone from work,” Kelsey said. “And since he’s not back yet, I think he’s getting laid.”

“Kelsey, no. Don’t say shit like that,” Matty said shaking his head.

We don’t say it but we all feel it. We’re happy that Dad goes out in the dating world. You’d think he’d forget about himself while he takes care of us. He’s a dad. He does a

lot of things.

Matty grabbed his phone and called someone.

“Jacky, you have to come over right now…Becky won the bear...Yes, that bear...I’m not f-ucking with you,” he said then hanging up. “They’re coming over and we want to know how

the f-uck you won the bear.”

I rolled my eyes and set the bear down on a chair. This bear is like royalty. And the fact that I have it right now is a mystery to me. I don’t know how Logan won the bear but he

did. And he won it for me.

The bear reminds me of Ally-bear. I took her into the bathroom that day and she went into the garbage the next because the blood wouldn’t come out. Dad tried everything. I lived.

And I lost my bear. Again.

Five minutes later, Jacky and Remy were over gushing over my bear. Remy actually tried bribing me for it. He left empty handed. He has my sister.

That’s more than enough.



- 11 -



My eyes cracked open and I stared at the warm, soft body lying beside me. I snuggled up to him and breathed him in. I feel like a child. I’m snuggling up to a bear. And he smells

like Logan.

My bedroom door cracked open and Dad stuck his head in.

“Birdie?” he whispered.

“I’m up,” I said uncurling my legs from Hunter. Yes, I named him Hunter. And no one will ever know that. Not even the man he’s named after.

Dad walked in and sat on my bed.

He stared at his hands for a bit then his dark eyes found mine. It’s not good. Whatever he’s going to say is going to crush me. It will tear my heart apart because I know that