Rock All Night(79)

“It wasn’t that funny,” he said.

“I know,” I said, slightly alarmed at my reaction.

“Well, thanks,” he joked.

That set me off giggling again.

“No, I mean… oh my God, is it happening?” I asked, suddenly remembering that I had eaten an illegal substance about twenty minutes ago.

“Could be.”

“Could be?”

“I don’t know. I never did mushrooms.”

“What did you do?”

“Cocaine, pot, some uppers and downers… nothing psychedelic.”

For some reason beyond understanding, that was the funniest thing I’d ever heard.

He just stood back and smiled as I doubled over in laughter.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

I was more than okay.

I was absolutely fan-f*cking-tastic.

“I’m just… happy,” I told him. And it was true; the corners of my mouth ached, I was smiling so big.

“Okay, well, that’s a good thing.”

“It is, isn’t it?” I said. I couldn’t have been more overjoyed that we agreed on that fact.

“Do you see anything yet?”

I looked around. “No, I don’t – uh… wait…”

I’d been expecting giant crocodile skeletons in the sky and fire hydrants with feet, so I missed it at first. But as I scanned the horizon, I noticed something odd.

The land kind of moved in… and out… and in… and out. Slowly. Like respiration.

“It’s breathing,” I whispered.

“Breathing?”

“Yeah… it’s like I can see it pulsing… real slow…”

“What is?”

“Everything.”

“O-kaaaay…”

I looked down at my right hand and was suddenly enthralled.

All the tiny, tiny lines – the creases in my palms, the quarter-millimeter grooves in my skin – were suddenly as distinct and obvious as if I were looking at them under a microscope. The blue shadows of my veins were absolutely fascinating as they twisted and branched under the pink of my skin.

Patterns.

Just like Derek had said.

And then my fingers – first the ring finger, then the middle, then the pointer – sloooowly grew longer, maybe a quarter of an inch… and then sloooowly retracted back to their former length.


“Oh my God,” I whispered. “I’m tripping.”

“Are you okay?” Ryan asked in concern.

I looked up at him.

And started grinning again like the Joker.

“I’m AWESOME,” I announced.

He laughed. “Okay, good.”

I looked down the road. Derek was standing out amongst the cacti and rocks, legs spread wide, arms flung out in the air like he’d just won an Olympic gold medal for… something. Probably for being Derek.

Killian was slowing turning around beside him, taking in the whole world in wide-eyed awe.

I gave Ryan a questioning look. “Is it okay if…?”

“Go ahead,” he smiled. “Have fun.”

I whooped, threw my arms around his neck and hugged him, and then ran off to join Derek.

When I ran up to him, he was beaming. “Did it kick in?”

“Yes!” I giggled.

“Isn’t it AWESOME?!”

“YES!”

He took me in his arms and kissed me, and for a moment, it felt like I was on the verge of exploding with happiness. All I was conscious of was that he was kissing me, and I was kissing him, and together we were sharing one perfect moment of absolute bliss.

It was all downhill from there.





65




There are a lot of things about hallucinating that are really only interesting if you happen to be the person on drugs. In general, though, I can tell you this: the colors were amazing. Everything was vibrant and beautiful.

And just like Derek said, there were patterns everywhere. Every line and edge among the rocks and scrub brush was fascinating, seeming to interweave with others until they formed a tapestry put there by the Universe and Nature and God, a wonder of design totally ignored by the average person until mushrooms lifted the veil and allowed them to see.

And everything pulsed. Everything was alive – and by that I mean in an organic way, like the earth and the desert and the rocks were all part of some living, breathing organism. It was astounding.

I was also giddy beyond belief. I could never remember being that happy, that overjoyed at the mystery and beauty of creation.

I would say that the first hour of that trip was one of the best of my life.

Unfortunately, the next three hours were among the absolute worst.

Everything was fine at first. Derek and Killian and I were laughing and pointing out things and oohing and aahing, while Ryan followed at a distance, watching the proceedings with a benevolent smile.

And then the sun started to go down.

The closer it sank to the horizon, the more unsettled I began to get. I didn’t realize it at first, the shift was so gradual – but I went from hilarity, to happiness, to contentment, to vague unease, to mild anxiety, to raging fear… and with no understanding of why.

In retrospect, it was obvious. There are two things I absolutely hate: being cold… and darkness.