Before I Saw You(38)
‘So, now we’re sitting comfortably, are you going to tell me what happened?’
Alice closed her eyes and began reciting all the information about the accident she’d managed to piece together. The only way she was going to get through it was to relay the events as though they belonged to someone else. There was no emotion left in her voice. Sarah listened patiently – she did not flinch or gasp or react, she simply allowed Alice to tell her story in its wholeness. The only sign that she was present was the hand that clasped hers tightly.
‘… and as soon as I was stable they moved me to this ward, I guess to kind of rehabilitate me before they eventually discharge me.’
There was a long pause. Saying it out loud had brought the enormity of what had happened to life, and Alice could see her friend trying to digest it all at once.
‘I can’t believe you went through all of that by yourself!’ She nestled her face into Alice’s neck. ‘If you weren’t in hospital right now, I’d be pretty mad you didn’t demand I come over sooner. In fact, I am livid you didn’t give the hospital my mobile number, but I’m not surprised. It was a very clever move, Alice, but it didn’t work, did it? When will you realize you can’t do everything on your own? Anyway, that’s by the by. I’m here now, aren’t I? Have they said anything about when you might be ready to leave? What’s the treatment plan? Are they helping you enough? Do you want me to speak to one of the doctors? Someone told me you had barely spoken until recently? It’s not good enough if they aren’t supporting you, Al.’
Hurricane Sarah had officially hit and Alice wasn’t quite sure the Moira Gladstone ward was ready for it. Remnants of last night’s conversation floated through her mind. It seemed that Alfie would actually get the privilege of meeting Sarah in the flesh.
‘Just breathe for a second, will you?’ It was what Alice always used to tell Sarah when she got herself worked up. ‘They’ve been amazing. Truly.’
‘OK.’ Sarah deflated before her eyes. ‘I’m just trying to make up for lost time here. So tell me, what have they done so far?’
Alice could feel her friend’s entire being slow down to a normal pace. It was important to get her to switch gears when she was in these moods, otherwise she had the potential to upturn everything in her path. ‘I’ve had one operation, and depending on how the wounds heal and how bad the scarring is, there may be more. At the moment I’m doing physio to get me moving again, and they are treating the wounds every other day. It’s a bit of a waiting game.’
‘Fine. Well, you know I’ll help you with whatever you need.’ Sarah seemed satisfied with her answer, but Alice knew this was only temporary. Sarah liked action; she practically lived on to-do lists and tasks, and she was willing to bet big money that more questions were just around the corner.
‘And how … how are you feeling about it all?’
There it was. The one question she really didn’t want to answer.
‘I was talking to Alfie about this last night. It’s all still quite overwhelming. The thought of leaving here feels way too big right now. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror – how am I going to be able to walk down the street, or leave the flat!’
She felt Sarah squeeze her hand tighter.
‘There are so many things about what you just said that need addressing, but firstly I want to know who this Alfie is?’
Alice gave a deep belly laugh. Of course Sarah would latch on to that.
‘Alfie is the lucky son of a bitch who gets to lie next to your friend every day and night! Hi … I’m guessing you’re the Sarah?’
A familiar hand shot through between the curtains. A smile of sheer delight erupted across Sarah’s face. Alice groaned. She knew that smile meant one thing and one thing only. Trouble.
‘Pleasure to meet you, Alfie,’ Sarah smirked as she shook his hand.
‘Come by any time, Sarah, my cubicle is an open curtain.’
‘I’ll be sure to, don’t you worry.’
Alice practically disappeared under the covers as Sarah flashed her a knowing wink.
30
Alfie
As much as Alice had tried to convince him that Sarah wouldn’t come for her, Alfie had known deep down it was only a matter of time. A part of him thought he might be jealous that Sarah was allowed inside Alice’s cubicle, but all he felt was relief that someone was going to be by her side. He tried so hard not to listen to their conversation. It felt intrusive and inappropriate. At one point, Alfie was tempted to turn the TV up as loud as possible, but then he thought that in itself was intrusive, so he turned to his faithful puzzle books. He managed quite well for a while, engrossing himself in a particularly hard Sudoku, but when he heard his name mentioned he couldn’t help but listen in. How could he not? They were talking about him!
After their brief introduction he forced himself to remain quiet. He knew they needed space, and luckily he had another physio session in the afternoon to take him away from any further temptation to make conversation. Just as he was making his way out of the ward, he heard someone running up behind him.
‘Hey, hold up a second, will you. It’s Alfie, isn’t it?’
‘The very one.’
Sarah looked him up and down, cocked her head to one side and then gave an approving smile. He appreciated how she barely blinked when she saw his missing leg. No lingering stare, no quick aversion of the eyes to pretend she hadn’t seen what he was lacking; just a steady gaze, taking him all in. Apparently he’d passed the test.