Be a Doll(36)

“That’s not what I mean,’’ she said and set down her mug with a steady hand while her back was so straight I couldn’t miss the tension in her body.

“Enlighten me, then.’’

I turned around to drop my empty mug in the sink, finding solace in this break from watching a woman who was mine in regard of the law, but wasn’t mine yet to do as I pleased. What would drive me crazy soon if nothing happened was the fact that I felt it getting closer. I knew the right nudge would ensure me I’d be able to fuck my wife until she couldn’t take it anymore, but something was keeping me from pushing it.

“You didn’t come back to bed last night.’’

I smirked then and looked at her over my shoulder and found her glaring at me when she registered my dimple in my cheek. “Oh, I see. You thought I was with another woman. Jealous, Mrs. Grimes?’’

The snort that came from her made me turn around. The unladylike sound surprised me. Where I expected her to have lost her polished posture, I saw her still sitting straight with her head held high and her eyes fiery on me.

“Dream on, Mathis.’’

“Why asking if you’re not? Shouldn’t you be relieved if I was with another woman, finding the relief you deny us both?’’ I was pushing, trying my best to make her mad and see that damn fire that kept on drawing me closer, awakening me to the deepest recess of myself where only darkness and an icy cold reigned.

“Are you saying that you were with a woman?’’ she asked, now disbelief and something else rendering her speech slower and slightly higher pitched when nothing on her face showed what she truly felt other than an annoyance I was accustomed to.

I considered my options before opening my mouth. I could try and make her jealous to push her closer to her breaking point, but while toying with her was something, a sort of hobby I enjoyed, that kind of game would push it.

Instead, I stalked to her and leaned down to get my mouth close to her ear uncovered by her high ponytail. Her perfume enveloped me, dizzying me in a way I wondered how come I didn’t have my mouth on hers while my hands hoisted her up on the island. I breathed her in and didn’t try to cover it up and I didn’t stop the dark chuckle from leaving my mouth when I saw her delicate skin pebbling.

“I slept in the guest bedroom closest to the stairs. Alone.’’ I took a step back and waited for her to look my way like anybody would, but she didn’t. Her fingers tightened around her mug and her jaw locked, but she kept her eyes fixed in front of her. “Relieved?’’

“Why do you feel the need to complicate things?’’ she asked quietly and in the way she uttered those words, I knew the question wasn’t asking for my answer. Then, she gave me her attention by turning her head toward me. “Is there anything I should know regarding your weekly routine?’’

Back to business. My disappointment made me frown. “I never come back home for lunch, but Mrs. McCarthy, the housekeeper, always comes mid-morning to take care of the apartment and she cooks too. You should see with her the kind of meals you’d like her to cook from now on. Also, I used to invite a few key employees to the restaurant now and then, but considering I’m a married man now I’ll let you know when those dinners need to be hosted so you can plan everything to your convenience. I suppose Carter Manor prepared you for such a task.’’

“It’s pretty basic,’’ she retorted and went back to her coffee, seemingly dismissing me.

“I’ll have more for you soon. Don’t expect this union to be that simple,’’ I warned and started walking away when her voice, clear and strong hit me in the back.

“Nothing is simple with you, Mathis, and it’s been a while since I’ve last had any expectations regarding my life.’’

For some reason, her statement put a dent in my carefully built assurance as I left behind my wife in an apartment I still had a hard time sharing with someone.

***





LILA


The bell ringing at the door put a stop to Mrs. McCarthy’s repeated congratulations for my marriage to Mathis. I offered the older woman with greying hair a frozen smile and left her to get back to her usual chores as I briskly walked to the door. One quick look through the peephole had my eyebrows arching high over my forehead as I unlocked the door and opened it to meet Megan’s anxious stare.

Lithe and dressed immaculately in a tight pair of jeans and a light pink polo shirt under a jacket, I offered her a smile and welcomed her after a warm greeting she returned with more enthusiasm than necessary.

“Are you all right?’’ I asked her as I led her to the living room where we sat on the couch while we heard Mrs. McCarthy busying herself in the kitchen. “I’m sorry, but I wasn’t expecting any visit so soon.’’

“I know.’’ She nervously brushed away a few strands of her dark hair. “I wanted to see you to apologize for the awful dinner. Mom wanted to see you herself, but I told her I’d come instead.’’

I shook my head and forced the smile to stay in place when the memory of that dinner at Mathis and Megan’s parents hit me again. I wanted to cringe at that disaster.

“You have nothing to apologize for. Your father is the one I blame and I’m sure your brother feels the same.’’ Here I was talking on Mathis’ behalf now. After spending the night twisting and turning alone in his huge bed, wondering if he was already finding solace in some woman’s arms and being bothered beyond what I was comfortable acknowledging, I was in knots whenever my husband’s name came to mind, which was pretty much constantly right now.