A Life More Complete(17)
I park the car and turn to Trini sitting across from me. Her face is sullen. She looks nothing like her usual smiley, giggly self. Although no one knows we’re leaving town the paparazzi will be stationed all around the airport just waiting for a story. This is L.A. after all. I hand Trini a pair of black Jackie O style sunglasses knowing that a picture of her right now is worth millions and the number of stories that could be spun from it are infinite.
“We’re going to Columbus, Wisconsin. We’re flying into O’Hare, driving to a clinic in Madison and then to Columbus,” I finally respond.
“Thank you.” Tears fall over her cheeks once again. She puts her head back against the seat and slips on the sunglasses. She mumbles under her breath before opening the car door. I grab our bag from the trunk and head into the mess that waits at the doors.
Camera flashes blind both of us and the sunglasses have never been more useful. We move past the crowd and head through to security. It seems as if everyone in the greater Los Angeles area is standing in the security lines. We hear the whispers and the cell phone cameras come out. It’s what it’s always like to travel anywhere with Trini, yet this time she’s not her courteous self. She doesn’t smile or wave. Right now I don’t care about her public persona and knowing what she’s going through, neither does she.
We sit in silence in the first class lounge waiting for our flight. I don’t speak to her, hell I can’t even look at her. I know one of us will cry if words are exchanged, so we just sit. We board the plane. Trini falls asleep immediately and I find relief in her quiet stillness. Four hours later, we land at O’Hare and leave in our unassuming rental car.
I steal a moment to look at Trini. She’s staring out the window, sunglasses still on and blank expression painted on her face.
“You okay?”
“No,” she mutters.
“You don’t have to do this.” I don’t know what else to say. I wish I could impart some wisdom on her that would end all of this.
“Yes I do. What other choice do I have?” Her voice is quiet. “Have a baby? End my career? Could you imagine the mess that would be? I don’t even have a mother. How could I possibly know how to be someone’s mom?” She is crying again as she pulls her knees up to her chest.
I quickly go through the logistics with her. I have scheduled an appointment with a doctor at a clinic in Madison. It will cost Trini a ton, but at least I know her privacy is guaranteed. After that we are heading to my best friend, Gia’s house so she can recover. Gia owns a farm on about thirty acres in the middle of nowhere. It’s a gravel road to a gravel road to a dirt road, miles from anyone. It’s exactly what she needs and it also allows me to see Gia.
“There was no way we could have pulled this off in L.A. and I figured this might be a nice break from the chaos.”
“Yeah, I guess. Thanks for figuring this out.” She is silent for a minute and then she turns to me pushing the sunglasses onto her head. “Thank you. I mean that. No one would help me the way you do. I know this is your job, but I really appreciate it.”
I shake my head and smile at her. “Trini, this isn’t my job. Being your publicist stopped being my job when we became friends.”
It has become hard to separate the two and this latest problem has made it nearly impossible. She’s never said it, but I know I’m her only friend. She’s surrounded by people day in and day out, yet none of them truly care about her. They’re all part of the show that’s become Trini’s life. Everyone playing a part, wanting to be close to the wealth and fame she carries, but when the shit hits the fan they scatter like rats. It’s sad and I know it, which is why I can’t turn my back on her.
We arrive at the doctor’s office. As I pull around back, I see Trini take a deep breath and release it slowly. I take her hand and she begins to cry again. There are no words that will ease her pain or make her decision any easier.
“You ready?”
“Yeah. Krissy?” I turn to her still holding her hand. “Will you stay with me? Don’t leave, please.”
“Of course. Whatever you need. I’m here.” Chills fill my body as we exit the car and make our way toward the dark office. We enter through the back door using a code the doctor gave me. A nurse greets us warmly, while she leads us into a cold sterile room with a picture of the beach hanging on the wall and an exam table in the center, as if the picture makes the room feel less ominous. Her voice is hushed while she speaks. She hands Trini a paper gown and leaves the room. Trini takes off her clothes. I can’t help but notice her belly, slightly rounder than before; something you would only notice if she weren’t wearing clothes. She wraps the gown around her body and crosses her arms over her stomach. She climbs on the table and covers herself with the blanket the nurse left.