Dear Heart, You Screwed Me(111)

“Baby, what is it?” my eyes volleyed back and forth to his.

He didn’t say anything.

“You’re scaring me… what’s happened?”

I felt his head drop, it was heavy in my hands but I pulled it back up so he had to look at me in the eyes. “Tell me,” my voice a little sterner now.

“I’m just trying to muster the words babe…” his eyes closed for a split second before they were back on me. “First off, Lordes PR…” he trailed off, “well… it’s yours.” He stopped for a moment, my eyes widening at the words that just left his mouth, “but only if you want it.”

“But… I mean…” I stammered, “what about Adele?”

“Adele is done, finished, no more…” he rubbed his lips together, “that’s what I was sorting out a few weeks back… when I missed our party.”

I couldn’t speak, words failed me.

“I know that still doesn’t make it better, but that’s where I was… I had to finalise the paperwork. It was meant to be done a couple of months back, but she was being hostile and making it an absolute ball ache but it’s done. The company is in your name… if you want it.”

I blinked a couple of times, just trying to register all of this in my head.

“And the reason it was such a ball ache for me to sort out was because…” he stilled, I dropped my hand and placed it on his chest. I could feel how fast his heart was beating, it was jack hammering inside his chest.

This is it.

This is where he was going to tell me that he and Adele used to be a thing and then slept together the day of my party.

I held my breath, puffing out my cheeks ready to receive the blow that was surely going to knock the air out of my lungs.

“Adele is Connie’s mom,” he rushed the words out so quickly it took me a moment to decipher the absolute craziness that just came from his mouth.

“I’m sorry…” I whispered, I’m sure my ears were playing tricks on me. My brows furrowed as I tried to replay his words. I held my index finger up, my eyes closing for a second. “Can you say that again?” my eyes pinged open, my brows sitting high in my forehead as I readied myself for the words again.

He sighed deeply.

“Adele is Connie’s birth mother.”

My mouth dropped open, my eyes bulging from my head as I stared at him completely dumbfounded.

Well shit.



Turns out Killian hasn’t heard from Connie since he told her the news. He asked me to try her but with no avail. She didn’t want to be spoken to and I completely got it. All she knew had been a lie. Her mums had assured Killian she was okay but to give her space.

My heart hurt for Connie, but I wanted to respect her wishes. I had left her some voicemails and some text messages telling her that I would be here for her when she was ready. She was not only pissed at her dad, she was pissed at her mums as well. She always believed that they got Killian’s sample from a sperm bank, but they didn’t. Adele got pregnant by Killian after a drunken night, Adele wanted nothing to do with the baby. Killian’s sperm was in a sperm bank and he had spoken to Lara and Katie but they never got round to using his sample. Adele agreed to give Connie up to Lara and Katie under a closed adoption, meaning her and Killian had no parental rights to Connie once the papers were signed.

Obviously, Killian was a big part of Connie’s life and would still continue to be if she wanted him there.

I wasn’t sure why Killian thought now was a good time to drop the bomb on Connie, but I suppose he had his reasons. Maybe this is why Adele was being such hard work with signing the papers over? Maybe she was holding something over his head to do with Connie and he couldn’t risk anything happening to her.

It was a lot to take in over a relaxing, post sex bubble bath.

But I had to trust what Killian said, and when Connie was ready, she can fill in the blanks.





CHAPTER 49





I lay under Killian’s arm, my head on his chest. His fingertips tracing shapes on my bare back. My hand splayed on his lower stomach, I felt comfort listening to his steady heartbeat.

“Can I tell you about my heart transplant?” his question shocked me but made me feel happy at the same time.

“Only if you want to tell me about it,” I smiled, my head still on his chest.

“I do,” he craned his neck down, placing a soft kiss on my temple.

“Then I am all ears.”

“So you know the issues I had with my heart. Well, I was over in London on business. I was trying to merge one of my businesses over there. I was on medication and was told to try not to elevate my stress levels but that’s easier said than done.” I heard the grunt that left him. “I was walking home, the air was crisp the night drawing in – winter was hiding just around the corner. Once I was in my hotel room, I was relaxing on the sofa flicking through the channels. Suddenly, I couldn’t breathe. I sat up abruptly, trying to catch my breath. But the more I tried, the harder it seemed. That’s when the panic began to set in. I was all alone in a foreign country and I didn’t know what to do.” His fingers stopped their trail for the moment, “Come to think of it, I remember being exhausted but I put it down to jetlag.” I lifted my head up and looked at him. He was looking ahead as if he was remembering the events of that night.