Bittersweet Memories (Off-Limits #4)(21)

“I wish I could tell you to take his advice, but I know it isn’t that easy to simply not worry. Truthfully, there’s nothing you can actually do, Alanna. All you can do is offer your dad the moral support he might need. I can imagine that what he’s worried about more than anything else is letting you down. He won’t want you to see him at his weakest, so for now just have faith in him, okay?”

She nods, but I can tell she isn’t listening. She’s anxious, and nothing I say will change that. I can’t blame her, either. I’d be the same in her situation.

“Your phone,” she says.

I blink in confusion, and Alanna points at my pocket.

“Your phone keeps dinging.”

I take off my gloves and unlock my phone, surprised to find several messages from Regina with her address and information about the party, in case I change my mind. Why couldn’t she just put all of that information in one single text? Why did she need to send me five?

“Who’s Regina?” Alanna asks, her tone different, harsher.

“No one.”

She looks at me then, a flash of hurt in her eyes. Fuck. When she looks at me like that she’s got me ready to sink down to my knees and beg for forgiveness for whatever crime she thinks I committed.

“Regina is just some girl from school. She’s in one of my seminars. I’d never even spoken to her before today.”

“So today was the first time you spoke to her, yet somehow you have her phone number already? That was fast, Si. Good for you.” She forces a smile, but she can’t hide the pain in her eyes. Not from me.

“Ray, she asked for my number so we can exchange notes. That’s all it is.”

Alanna nods and looks back at the soup she’s making. “Is she pretty?”

What? What am I supposed to say to that? “No? I’m not sure.”

“You’re not sure?” she repeats. “You’ve seen her before, right? Do you think she’s pretty?”

Is she… jealous? I can’t help but smile at the thought of it. She and I have been dancing around each other, both of us well aware that we can’t cross the line, but every once in a while she slips up, and I love it when she does. I love it when she shows me how deeply she cares.

“No, Ray. I don’t think she’s pretty.”

Her shoulders slump in relief, and she smiles. “Oh,” she says, trying to act nonchalant when she can’t keep her smile off her face.

I’m done for. I’m falling for her, and no matter how hard I resist, I can’t stop. I can’t stop wanting more of her. More of her smiles, more of her company, more of her touch.

I can’t stay away… but I have to.





Chapter Twelve





Alanna



I sit up when I hear the front door open, my eyes wide. I don’t remember the last time Dad made it home for dinner. It’s been months since we even had a real conversation.

“Alanna, sweetheart.”

Dad looks exhausted, but it’s more than that. His work has always been his passion, and these days his eyes look vacant. The fire I’m so used to seeing in him is gone. He still hasn’t told me what exactly is going on, but from what I understand, the company is struggling worse than it ever has before.

“You’re home early! Come have dinner with me, Dad.” I pat the seat next to mine as I get up to grab him a plate. I feel Dad’s eyes on me and look back, a smile on my face. The way he’s looking at me has me worried. I’ve never seen Dad looking so lost, so discouraged. The last time I saw him wearing that expression was at Mom’s funeral.

“I made some spaghetti.” It’s simple, but it does the job. If I’d known that Dad was going to be home tonight, I definitely would’ve tried to make something nicer.

“Looks great, honey.”

I sit down next to him and watch him for a moment. “It’s so good to have you home for dinner,” I murmur. “I can’t remember the last time we had dinner together.” It’s been months, for sure.

Dad looks down at his plate and nods. “I’ve let you down, Alanna.” His voice is soft, his regret palpable. “Work has overshadowed everything, and even so, it isn’t enough.”

I place my hand over his and shake my head. “No, Dad. You could never let me down,” I tell him. “I know how hard you work, and you were right, you know? Volunteering at the shelter truly did make me appreciate everything we’ve got so much more. I get why you work so hard.”

He smiles at me, and I breathe a sigh of relief. This is the first real smile I’ve seen on his face in months. “Your eighteenth birthday is coming up soon,” he says, tightening his grip on my hand. “The months are flying by, each day filled with nothing but work. I haven’t even had time to make up for missing your seventeenth birthday. How about I take you to that restaurant you wanted to go to back then? Or is there something else you’d rather do?”

I shake my head. “I’m not sure, Dad. It’s so pricey, and it seems unnecessary. How about we just have dinner at home together? I just want to spend my birthday with you. It doesn’t matter where.”

Dad looks at me and shakes his head. “No, I’ll take you there. I insist.”