Big Chicas Don't Cry(98)

And just like that, he disappeared out the door.

A chill ran through my body, even though I was still inside the warmth of the restaurant. It was the emptiness of realizing I’d probably never see him again.

But then I did.

Nathan walked back into the restaurant and stopped in front of me. “I don’t play games, Selena. You know that. And I’ve always told you the truth. So here it is. I miss you. And it kinda hurts when you text and call but won’t let me be with you the way I want to be with you. So if you still don’t want me, then please give me a break and leave me alone.”

I was too stunned to say anything at first. He shook his head, and I think he called himself an idiot and turned toward the door.

He was going to disappear again, and I couldn’t take the chance that he’d come back a second time. So I yelled, “No!”

“No?” he said as he walked back to me.

“No. I’m not going to leave you alone. I was an idiot, Nathan. I got scared and I pushed you away. You’ve never played games with me, and I should’ve just told you the truth.”

“And what’s the truth?”

“That I want to be with you. For real. Like dating and stuff.”

He smiled finally and moved closer. “Dating and stuff, huh? That sounds fun.”

“Oh, it is. So is that a yes?”

“It most certainly is,” he said, and he leaned forward to kiss me.





Chapter Sixty-Four


MARI


I hated that I felt like an intruder in my own house.

But that’s exactly what I was now.

I had called Letty to let me know when Esteban had left for the day so I could come by and pick up more of my things now that I’d moved into my own apartment back in Inland Valley. She’d texted that morning and said he would be gone by nine.

Although I wasn’t technically breaking in, since I still had a key, I didn’t like having to go behind Esteban’s back. But I had no choice. Through our lawyers, we’d agreed to put the house on the market in January. I had requested numerous times to talk to him in person because he wouldn’t return my phone calls or texts. I didn’t blame him. He thought I’d betrayed him, and in some ways I had.

If he never talked to me again, I wouldn’t have blamed him.

The house was empty. It made me sad not to see a Christmas tree in the foyer or garland around the staircase. Letty had told me that Esteban had forbidden her from putting up any decorations. And if my heart wasn’t already broken, it surely wouldn’t have survived hearing that.

But I couldn’t dwell. I ran upstairs and started grabbing clothes from the drawers and stuffing them in the bag I’d brought with me. It took me less than ten minutes to get what I needed. The rest could wait for another day.

As I headed down the stairs, I heard motion in the kitchen. Thinking Letty had returned early from her shopping trip, I put down my bags by the front door and walked over to give her a long-overdue hug.

I stopped when I saw Esteban standing over the sink.

“Oh,” I said. “It’s you.”

“What are you doing here?” he replied.

“I needed to get a few things. You wouldn’t answer my texts, so I asked Letty if I could come by while you were out. I’m done now, so I’ll be leaving.”

His face was blank. “She told me I had to come home right away because the sink was flooding the kitchen.”

“That’s strange. I didn’t think she was even here.”

He dragged his hand over his face. That’s when I noticed how tired he looked. “She’s not here. I think she was trying to make us talk.”

My heart pounded in my chest. I thought I was ready to see him and talk to him face to face. But I wasn’t.

“Oh. Well, I’m sorry she did that. I know you’re busy and don’t have time to leave the office for things like this. Like I said, I’ll go so you can get back to work.”

“Are you staying with him?”

I knew who he meant. “No, I’m not. Did he tell you that?”

“No.”

“I found an apartment in Inland Valley,” I explained.

He raised his eyebrows. “Really?”

“Really. It’s a long story.”

We stood there staring at each other. I wasn’t sure anymore if he wanted me to go.

He folded his arms against his chest. “Chris didn’t say you were staying with him. In fact, he denied it too. I just thought he was lying. I always think he’s lying now.”

My heart sank. “He’s not lying. And I’m not lying, Esteban. Chris is not the reason why our marriage wasn’t working. I swear. Nothing happened between us.”

“Then why?”

And that’s when I realized Esteban still didn’t understand.

“Because I’ve been unhappy for a very long time.”

“You never said anything.”

“I did. Well, I tried. You were never around long enough to listen.”

He threw up his hands and walked around the counter. “So this is my fault? I am such a bad husband that I worked long hours to provide you with this beautiful life.”

I walked farther into the kitchen. “That so-called beautiful life was both of ours. And I worked just as hard, if not more, to build it.”