Big Chicas Don't Cry(102)

I realized then that Welita’s legacy wasn’t the recipes she had left behind on those yellowed and frayed index cards.

It was all of us. It was family.

I walked inside my abuela’s patio, and even though I could feel everyone’s eyes on me, I ignored them and went straight to Araceli, who was sitting next to her mom. I grabbed her hand and led her back outside to where the other girls were playing.

I instructed them all to sit in a circle on the grass and told them to listen to me because I had something very important to say. When they were finally quiet, I tried to think of the words Welita had once told me.

“All of you are family,” I began. “That is never going to change. Just because someone makes you mad or doesn’t share her toys doesn’t mean that she doesn’t love you. Why? Because you’re family, that’s why. One day, you girls are going to grow up and move away from each other—”

“Not me,” interrupted Jaycee, my tío David’s daughter.

“Me either. I’m always going to live with Jaycee,” her sister Jenny insisted.

Sophia, my tía Gloria’s youngest, raised her hand.

“Yes, Sophia?” I asked softly.

“When I grow up, I want to live here in Abuelo and Abuela’s house.”

“I think that would be amazing,” I said. “But what I want you to remember is that wherever you live, you always need to find a way to stay close with your cousins. Friends will come and go. But your family, tu familia, is forever.”

The girls nodded and then got up to go finish playing, even Araceli. I watched them for a bit, and for the first time since Welita passed away, I felt some peace.

It was time to get back to the tamales. I rubbed my eyes one last time and walked back inside to the biggest surprise of my life.

Adrian was standing in the middle of my abuela’s patio.

When our eyes met, he didn’t smile or nod. He just yelled out, “Why did you quit?”

“You quit?” My mom, who had been sitting at a table next to my tía Espy, shot up from her chair. “Why, Erica? What were you thinking?”

I ignored her and the rest of the questioning looks I could feel being thrown in my direction. But I didn’t look at anyone. Only Adrian.

“What are you doing here?” I asked instead.

“Because I need to know why you quit.”

“Why aren’t you in Big Bear?” The questions in my head wouldn’t stop because there was no way this was really happening right now.

“I drove back this morning. I needed to talk to you.”

“So, wait, do they work together?” I heard my tía Espy whisper behind me.

Selena whispered back, “I think that’s her boss.”

“Why does her boss, or her former boss, need to talk to her on Christmas Eve? I’m so confused right now.”

She wasn’t the only one. “Why couldn’t this wait until after your vacation?”

“I’ll tell you if you tell me why you quit.”

“I . . .” The words wouldn’t come out. Couldn’t.

I finally looked around the patio, and the first eyes I met belonged to Mari. Without saying a word, I pleaded with her to help me. She nodded in understanding.

“These tamales aren’t going to make themselves. Come on, everyone, back to work. Erica, why don’t you take your friend outside to the front?”

I nodded.

Adrian followed behind me as I walked outside to my abuela’s driveway. Cars were packed in like sardines. I stopped walking once I got to my mom’s SUV.

“How did you know I was here?” I asked when he joined me.

“I tried calling your cell a couple of times, but you didn’t answer,” he explained.

“My phone is charging inside the house.”

He looked away. “Anyway, your personnel file has your parents’ phone listed as an emergency contact. Your dad told me where you were.”

“You talked to my dad?” I couldn’t grasp anything he was saying.

His quick nod turned into a furious shaking. “Look, I’m sorry for just barging into your Christmas Eve like this. But I don’t understand what’s going on. And I really need to. Were you already planning to quit before . . .”

“Before I told you that I was in love with you?” The calmness in my voice surprised me. “Yes. I got a job as a features reporter with Above the Fold. I’m going to be working out of their LA office.”

Adrian’s eyes widened. “Holy shit, Erica. That’s amazing. Congratulations.”

The sound of genuine enthusiasm, and even pride, in his words warmed my insides despite the cool weather. “Thank you. Now your turn. Why couldn’t this wait until you came back from Big Bear?”

“Actually, you still didn’t answer my first question. Why did you quit?”

“I told you already. I got another job with Above the Fold.”

“But why did you even apply? Am I that horrible of a boss?”

“Yes, of course,” I deadpanned. “But that’s not why.”

“Then why?”

“Honestly, at first, it was because of you. There was a part of me that thought maybe if I didn’t work at the News-Press anymore, then you’d let yourself see me as more than just your friend and your employee. I thought maybe something more could happen between us.”