The Do-Over(57)

“Well, Julien’s a piece of shit and he doesn’t deserve to ruin my brother’s life and rob him of his happiness and he should not be allowed to do that to you either.”

Shrugging my shoulders, “I really don’t know what I can do. The damage is already done and Lord knows what he’s already said to Wes.”

“Wes loves you, Tara. He doesn’t want to be without you. He just got hit with a double whammy and doesn’t know whether he’s coming or going. He’s bracing for pain and loss and in some deluded way, he thinks what he’s doing will minimize that.”

“I don’t know how to get through to him. And I don’t want Julien to do or say anything else that could hurt Wes.”

“You love him, don’t you?”

I nodded. “How could I not? He’s going to be a very rough one to get over.”

“Well, you need to have some hope, Tara.”

Here was Stacy, in the throes of fighting for her life, trying to convince me to keep the faith. Amazing. “I don’t want to set myself up for something that’s not going to happen. And with Julien by Wes’ side every day, I don’t stand a chance.”

Taking a deep breath and nodding her head, Stacy said, “I’m going to tell you something that very few people know about. I know it, Julien knows it and my two best friends from high school know it. Wes does not know it. Use it if you want. Or don’t use it. I’m telling you this so that you have an ace up your sleeve to protect yourself, okay.”

“Okay.” I was dying to know what she had to tell me.

“When I was sixteen years old and Wes and Julien were nineteen, I slept with him a few times. I actually lost my virginity to him. He was so good looking that I didn’t even care what a total dick he was. I was young and stupid and I got pregnant. I was in 10th grade at the time and I didn’t know what to do. I told Julien about it and of course his first response was how did I know it was his.”

“What a douche. Why is Wes even friends with him? Wes is such a quality human being.”

“Wes’ downfall – he sees the best in people.”

Stacy read the look on my face as I silently asked the question, Why isn’t he seeing the best in me?

“Give him time, Tara. He’s on overload, but he’ll come around. Anyway, I asked Julien for money to help me pay for an abortion and to please come with me. He threw half the money at me like I was some cheap whore, not his best friend’s sister who he had watched grow up. He also promised to come with me and drive me, and on the day of the appointment, he no-showed and wouldn’t answer my phone calls. My friend Ali came with me and we had to take the bus there and back.”

“Just when I thought I couldn’t despise him more. And you never told Wes?”

Stacy shook her head. “I was sixteen and scared.”

“It’s hard to imagine you fearing anything.”

“I was afraid my brother would never look at me the same. And I was ashamed.” Stacy paused. “So, if he f*cks with you, Tara, tell him you know all about April 22, 1994 and that you’ve got proof.”

“Proof?”

Stacy grabbed a pen and paper from the tray next to her bed and began to scribble a note.

Wes,

Tara is telling the truth. On 4/22/94, I had an abortion. The baby was Julien’s. He called me a whore and then stood me up and made me take a bus to get the abortion. Ali came with me. I’m sorry I never told you. I love you.

~ Your Brat

“Trust me, you will never, ever need this. This note will not see the light of day. But if Julien attacks you, you have that. And Wes will know I wrote that.”

I noticed that my hands were shaking as I held the note. I was beyond angry at this man and angry at Wes for not seeing through him. “Wes is a savvy guy, Stace. I don’t understand how Julien has continued to dupe him.”

“The man is a great actor and Wes has always had a soft-spot in his heart for him because Julien lost his parents very young. They were in a car accident when he was eight and Wes kind of adopted him into our family after that. For some reason, Wes has always felt a responsibility to him as if he were the third sibling. And you know when it’s family, sometimes you’re more forgiving.”

An x-ray tech entered wheeling in a mobile x-ray machine. “Stacy Bergman?” he asked.

“That’s me.”

“I’ve come to get a couple of pictures of your lungs.” And then turning to address me, “This will only take a few minutes.”

Grabbing my purse, I stepped out into the hall. Checking my phone, there was a wave of disappointment that there was nothing from Wes. Which after three days shouldn’t have come as a shock. But I was still hoping beyond hope.

The door to Stacy’s room opened and the tech wheeled his machine out. “You can go back in now.”

“Wow. That was quick,” I said to Stacy, sitting down by her bed again.

“So, you were pretty funny with my doctor.” Stacy smiled at me.

“He looks like a movie star.”

“The nurses were telling me his mother is some big socialite here in the city.” As soon as Stacy finished her sentence, he walked into the room, followed by a nurse carrying an IV bag. “Speak of the devil.”

“Hopefully good things,” he smiled.