Fire In His Eyes (Secrets & Seduction #1)(24)

By seven I was running, well almost finished running. I ran five miles every day before work, religiously, and rode twenty miles on Saturdays on my bike. I did weight training three times a week after school. I was determined to keep the body I had regained after my long bout of depression. When I ran, I carried my phone with me, in case I got hit by a car, or something. I felt it vibrate at my waist. I was in the cool down part of the run, so I picked it up, and glanced at the caller ID. Victor.

I stopped running, but continued to walk. I answered the phone. My run hadn’t cooled my temper. I didn’t even say hello. “Nice disappearing act. I didn’t know you were a magician as well as such a great lover.” The words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them.

“Sorry, yeah, that is why I called. I know it was rude. I am sorry. I can tell you’re mad, but you’re making some weird sounds, too.”

“I just finished a run.” Was he trying to change the subject, I thought.

“Oh, yeah, me too. That’s why I left. Well, I couldn’t sleep last night after and when you did, I just decided to call it a night and come home and run. It helps me think, clears my head. I’m on my way to work, but didn’t want you to wait until this evening before I explained. I’ll call you tonight, just please don’t be mad. I know you have to get ready for work, so I’ll call you tonight, okay?” he rambled.

I was having a hard time buying this explanation, but I didn’t think it would be appropriate to question him about it now. And, I did need to get ready for work. I didn’t like what he had done, and I would let him know that when he called tonight. “Ok, Victor, I don’t need an explanation, and I don’t want to force one out of you. I know where I stand. You have explained you’re situation. I am fine the way it is, for now,” I added.

“But you deserve more. You were incredible last night. What you allowed me to do . . .” he paused and I heard a catch in his breathing. “I’ll call you later. I promise,” I could almost see him wincing as he said those words. He had told me he could not make me any promises, and I thought he had meant it.



The call from Victor came at six o’clock when I was sitting down to eat alone.

“Hi, Victor,” I answered, pushing my plate away.

“Hello, Monica. How was your day? Another good one, I hope?” he asked tentatively.

“It was good, Victor.” I answered. “Kids behaved. Nothing extraordinary happened at work today.” Then, “I do want to be honest, though, I was upset by the way you left last night. A note would have been nice if you didn’t want to wake me.”

“Monica, it’s that I couldn’t sleep and was restless. I didn’t want to rummage around looking for paper. I am sorry. I won’t do it again.” Hmm, another promise I thought.

I had told him how I felt, and I did not want it to become an issue. Our relationship was tentative at best. “Okay, I forgive you, but I just wanted you to know how I felt.”

“Thanks for being honest. I don’t want you to lie to me,” he stated. There was a pause and it was slightly awkward. “Listen, Monica, what I told you earlier, I meant. I’m not in a place in my life where I can commit to a relationship. Last night, after we had sex a part of me realized just how special you are, and I am not a guy that goes around hurting girls. I couldn’t sleep because I just kept thinking I was going to hurt you somehow, and I don’t want to hurt you. That is why I left so abruptly. I just needed to clear my head and think.”

Hearing that explanation made me feel a whole lot better. If he was worried that he would hurt me then he did care about my feelings, and that could grow. So, he had left out to think about me, us, and then had called. I was foolish to be falling in love with this man, deep down I knew it, but my god I just could not help myself.

“Victor, I can tell you’re not a mean guy. And, I don’t think I am being used by you, if that is what you’re worrying about. You have been honest with me about where you are right now, I respect that a lot, and even if I don’t know the particulars and the ins and outs of your situation, I’m okay with that, for now,” I added.

“It is the for now part, that worries me, Monica,” he stated truthfully.

“We can cross that bridge when we get to it. Can’t we? Can we not worry about that right now, Victor? Please. I am enjoying what we have. I promise I won’t put any demands on you.” It was a promise I would keep, I told myself.

“Are you sure?” he asked sounding a little hopeful, well more so than when the call started.

“Yes, I am sure.” I wasn’t. But, I was beginning to really care about him, but telling him that would not be a good idea; I knew instinctively it would not do me any good.

“Okay, I can come over again next week, or you can come to my place. This weekend is family, next is the reserves, and the week after family again, but the weekend after that maybe we can go away together and do something. Wednesday and Thursday are the best nights for me by the way.”

“I will come to you,” I stated. “Just let me know when the day gets closer which is better for you. I can sleep over and drive home the next morning.” I was thrilled about having him for a whole weekend, but did not mention it. I didn’t want to sound too eager.

“Okay sounds good. It’s a date.” He laughed nervously. “I will call you a couple of times during the week, too, and you can call me whenever you want. I may not be able to answer right away, but I will always return your call as soon as I can.” Something tightened in my chest a little, but it was a good feeling.