Belong (Seven Year Itch #3)(73)

“Because, Chad, I need to know you and Harper are going to be okay. I want to go in peace, and right now I’m too concerned about the both of you. I need help.”

“I’ll do whatever you need,” Rachel offered.

Veronica turned her attention away from me.

“I need to know they’re going to be okay. I must be dying to say this to you.” She paused. “I need you to be here with them. Help them through this when I’m gone.” Veronica started to cry. I grabbed tissues and handed them to her as I made my was around the desk to comfort her.

“You don’t have to do this.”

Veronica argued. “Yes I do. I need to know my little girl will have someone to talk to. I need to know when the time comes she has a woman in her life to explain things. I need to know her father isn’t going to wither away in regret, because he feels guilty for something he had no control over. Rachel, I know we aren’t friends. I don’t blame you for hating me. I got to have the life you wanted with Chad. When I got sick, he returned to me. He’s been my rock, and I can never thank him enough for what he’s sacrificed.”

“It was never a choice. I knew where I needed to be.”

She snickered at my response. “You’re always doing the right thing, Chad. What about you? When are you going to realize you need to live too?”

“I’ll deal with my life when the time comes. For now I know where my responsibilities lie.”

“Bullshit. It’s time you let someone do something selfless for you.”

She gave her attention back to Rachel. “Do you love my husband?”

Rachel stumbled on her answer, probably because she was afraid of what would happen if she told the truth. “Yes.”

“Would you do anything to see him happy again?”

Rachel shrugged. “Within reason. Why are you asking? What am I here for, Veronica? I mean no disrespect, but it’s not my place to interfere. If Chad needs me for anything, he just had to ask, otherwise I’d like to give you space.”

“I don’t want you to give him space. I want you here, with them when it happens. I need to know they’ll be okay.”

Rachel looked to me before replying. “Okay.”

“I don’t think you understand what I’m asking. I need you here, all the time. I need you to move your stuff in. this house is half yours anyway. Charles obviously thought you’d end up together. I want to know my daughter can trust you,” she began to weep. “To love you.”

Enough was enough. While I could feel the burning in my own eyes, I looked toward Rachel and saw her reaching across the desk to touch Veronica’s hand. “I’ll do it. I’ll take care of them. You have my word.”

Veronica smiled for a split second and then turned her head to look at me. “Can you take me back upstairs now?”

I helped her up, lifting her into my arms so she didn’t have to struggle. She said nothing as we climbed the steps, not until we were in the privacy of her bedroom.

“I’m not letting her move in here. You’re giving up.”

“Chad, let’s be realistic. I don’t have much time left. You love her and she loves you. I need to know you’re taken care of, because if you’re happy, Harper will be okay.”

“This is a crazy idea.”

“Why? What mother gets to choose who raises her daughter if something were to happen? I’m grateful.”

“You hate her.”

“No. I hated how much you loved her. I was jealous. All my life I’ve wanted a love like that. I can’t keep fighting the inevitable. I’m dying, Chad. I need to know my family will be okay in my absence. You’re a great father, but Harper is going to need a mother, someone who will love her and treat her like she’s their blood. Rachel has done that already. You told me she raised her step-daughter. She loves you, which means she’d do anything for you. As much as it hurts me that I can’t be here to watch my little girl grow up, I need to make sure she had the best life possible. Why can’t you understand that?”

Even though I understood what she was implying, I still couldn’t wrap my head around it. It seemed wrong and inappropriate. “I feel like you’re testing me. I don’t know what to say.”

“Before I got sick, when we were talking about divorce, what did you want more than anything?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Chad, tell me. What did you want?”

I peered over at Harper, still sound asleep, unknowing of her mother’s twisted idea of securing a replacement mother. “What good will this do? I’ve done everything that’s expected of me. I’ll take care of Harper.”

“What do you want?” She repeated.

Feeling annoyed, and quite frankly shocked by her ability to raise her voice, I realized she ultimately wanted the truth, no matter how painful it would be for her. “I want to be happy again,” I confessed in a whisper.

“I’m making sure it happens, Chad. Consider it my going away gift. You may not understand. Maybe it doesn’t make sense at all, but I need to know she’s capable of winning over Harper. I need to see them together. I want her here, but it’s more for you. You can’t do this alone, not anymore.”

“I’m not going to flaunt her around in front of you.”