While It Lasts (Sea Breeze #3)(49)

Before I could get the hell away from her she spun around and hurried to shore. The pain in my chest became unbearable. I bent over and put my hands on my knees. FUUUUCK. This hurt.

The Jeep roared to life and I listened as she drove away. She’d run again but this time I’d sent her running.

I stood up, threw my head back and yelled, “MOTHER FUCKER” as the sun beat down on me. Mocking me. Mocking my life.



Eva

Josh was gone. Jeremy was gone. Cage was gone. I had no one. I couldn’t stand this. I needed to make the pain go away. I’d been so hurt that staying away from Cage the rest of the week had been the only way I could deal with it. Even then all I could manage to do was cry. He’d been with other women. I wanted to believe he was lying just to hurt me but I knew he wasn’t. I had seen the sincerity in his eyes.

The idea of someone else touching him and feeling his hands all over her body, made me nauseous. I couldn’t stand it. I needed to forget. I needed to wash that image in my head away. The pain was only getting worse. He thought I’d rejected him and in a way, I had. He was right. I deserved this. But it hurt so incredibly bad.

I pulled my Jeep into Nelly’s. It was the only honky—tonk in town. It was also the only place a twenty year old could get a drink. I needed to feel numb. Alcohol was the only thing I could come up with that would work.

Nelly wasn’t above slipping you a drink if you had the money. Because of this she managed to run a very successful business. Out here in the country no one thought to come check her out. She got away with a lot of things because she was off the radar.

I had pulled out the blue jean mini skirt that Josh had loved so much and put it on as a source of comfort. I completed my honky—tonking outfit with cowboy boots and a shiny black halter—top. I was going to dance with attractive men and drink enough tequila to make the pain go away. Cage may have thrown me aside once he got tired of me but I wasn’t undesirable. Many guys would be thrilled to have my attention.

I jerked the door open. As I stepped into the smoky bar, I searched for Becca Lynn. She’d texted me and told me to come meet her here if I was up for some fun. I noticed her dancing with a guy with a black Stetson and a pair of tight jeans. Becca Lynn was rubbing every part of her body against his as the live band played an old country song that reminded me of Daddy’s Hank Williams Jr. albums.

Nelly was at the bar and I headed over to order my first shot of the night.

“Didn’t ‘spect to see you back here after Jeremy came to peel you off the floor the last time you stopped in.” Nelly’s concerned frown bothered me. Did everyone in town stick their noses in my business?

“I need a drink, Nelly,” I told her as I sat down on the empty stool in front of her.

She sighed, “Alrighty girl, reckon you’re a woman now.” She grabbed a shot glass and poured Jose Cuervo silver into the glass then slid it over to me.

“You wanting lime and salt with that?”

“No. This is fine,” I replied and slung it back. The heat burned all the way down my throat. I put the glass back down and pushed it back to her.

“Easy now, sugar,” she chided and filled the glass again before sliding it back to me.

“I just need two to get me loosened up.”

I took the glass and downed it quickly. The burn was less intense but it was still there.

“This ‘cause Jeremy left for school?” Nelly asked, leaning her elbows on the bar and studying me. Her long black hair was peppered with gray and pulled back into a ponytail. Hard living hadn’t been good to her and although she was probably around her mid-forties she looked older. Her skin was weathered and hard looking.

“No. This time it isn’t because of a Beasley boy,” I informed her, sliding my glass to her. “Just one more,” I told her.

“Who am I gonna call with Jeremy gone if you end up trashed?”

“I won’t get drunk, I promise. I just need a buzz, Nelly.”

Her wrinkled lips puckered into a frown and she poured me one more glass.

I didn’t wait for her to give it to me. I reached over, picked it up and downed it. The numbness started to set in and Cage York seemed less important. Perfect. I smiled at Nelly and would have kissed her sagging cheek if I could reach her. She’d given me my first relief from the pain since Cage had discarded me.

Standing up, I had to stop a second to steady myself when the room shifted a little. Once I had my balance I walked out to the dance floor. I’d dance by myself. I didn’t need a man.

“Eva Brooks, I do believe you have been drinking,” a familiar voice drawled and I lifted my gaze from the floor where I’d been focused on not falling over and met the smiling brown eyes of Mark Ganner. Mark had played wide receiver in high school. Josh had often said that Mark was his ‘go to’ guy. He could catch a ball no matter how bad the throw.

“Mark.” I smiled; glad to see someone from my past.

“You look real good, Eva.”

I reached out and grabbed his arm and leaned on him some. My legs were still a little numb. “Thank you,” I replied.

“You wanna dance?” Mark asked “YES!”

Mark laughed and pulled me into his arms. I was thankful for some support.

“What have you been up to?” he asked as we moved together to the music.