Undone(13)

I couldn’t see him near the bonfire. I could see a lot of torsos though – Kai was missing out big time. Some of the boys were doing some kind of tribal dance round the fire, beating their chests and whooping. Lucas the Lion was leading them, of course. His chest had red markings on it – it looked liked paint, but was probably lipstick. He must have been sweating, because his chest was sort of glistening in the firelight. His jeans were slung low and you could see the black band of his underwear.

Lots of the girls were blatantly ogling Lucas. Idiots. I turned away and wandered down a little path towards the end of the garden, which was a lot bigger than it looked. I swore as I nearly fell over a couple grappling on the grass behind a bush. They didn’t even notice me – all that grunting and moaning must have masked my voice. I recognized the girl straight away – Amber Sheldon (aka Parrot Girl) – but I couldn’t tell who the boy was. His face was buried in her neck and his bare arse didn’t provide any clues.

I shuddered and hurried on. I couldn’t believe people really did things like that in real life. Shagging in the garden at some random party? Degrading doesn’t even come close to covering it. Didn’t these people have any self-respect? Mind you, if I was Amber Sheldon, I wouldn’t respect myself much either.

At the end of the garden I found a vegetable patch and a greenhouse. I’d never been in a greenhouse before and now seemed like the right time to explore one. I peered through the glass to check there were no more bare arses or bare anythings. It was empty so I went on in. It was weirdly warm inside. I couldn’t work out how that was possible (that’s how drunk I was) and when I remembered the Greenhouse Effect I laughed out loud, then swiftly covered my mouth because laughing when you’re alone is just plain weird.

There was a long wooden bench with lots of little pots on it and lots of green things growing in the little pots. You could hardly hear the music from the house. It was peaceful and warm and made me feel sleepy. And there just happened to be a comfy chair in the back corner which looked like it was begging me to sit in it. I swear it was like a scene from Goldilocks or something.

I collapsed into the chair and closed my eyes, relieved to have escaped the madness of the party. I’d curl up here for an hour or so, then go and find Kai and drag his arse home. I wouldn’t mind going to more parties if they all had a safe haven like this.

Then my safe haven was destroyed.

By a chimpanzee. A horny, sinister chimpanzee.





chapter seven


‘Hello? Drunk girl? Are you in here? Helloooo?’

I didn’t recognize the voice, but I didn’t have to recognize it to know it was someone I did not want to deal with. I stayed quiet, cowering down into the seat, trying to make myself as small as possible. There was a crash and a ‘Shit!’ as he banged into the bench.

‘Ah, there you are! Why are you hiding back there?’ It was Stu Hicks. And he wasn’t wearing a top. Someone had scrawled ‘COCK’ in black marker across his chest. I hoped it was permanent.

‘I’m not . . . hiding.’

He started wagging his finger at me, smiling and nodding. ‘You! I know you. You’re that girl, aren’t you?’

I wanted to get up but now he was standing right over me. He stank of beer and sweat and something else that I put down to miscellaneous monkey scent. I sighed and gulped down the last of my drink, trying my best to look nonchalant. ‘What girl? Yes, I am a girl. Gold star for noticing. Now could you please f*ck off and leave me alone?’

‘Heeeeey, no need to be like that! I was just being friendly! Sorry, let’s start again. Hi, I’m Stuart. Nice to meet you.’ Then he bowed so low his face was practically in my lap. I think that was probably the idea.

‘Um. I’m Jem.’

‘Jem! That’s it! I knew I knew you. Never forget a face – one of my many talents.’ He had an OK sort of smile actually – when he wasn’t smirking. He didn’t look so sinister after all. ‘Mind if I take a pew?’ I said nothing, so he perched on the corner of the workbench. His legs dangled so that one of them was touching mine. ‘I’m knackered – I had to do laps round the garden. Which wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t have Bugs on my back riding me like a f*cking supersize jockey.’

I stifled a laugh and Stu grinned. ‘So you can smile after all! I was beginning to wonder.’

‘Aren’t you cold?’

He looked down as if he’d forgotten he wasn’t wearing a top. ‘Nah, I’m hard as nails, me. Anyway, it’s pretty toasty in here, isn’t it? Kind of cosy.’

I shrugged. I’d run out of things to say. He was watching me carefully, head tilted to one side, eyes slightly narrowed. Analysing me. ‘Can I kiss you?’

I definitely wasn’t expecting that. ‘Why would you want to do that?’

He shrugged. ‘I dunno. Bored I guess.’ He saw the look on my face and held up his hands. ‘Kidding!’ He shrugged again. ‘I like kissing . . . and you seem nice. Those seem like two pretty good reasons to me.’

My head was spinning. Stu Hicks aka Mr Studly wanted to kiss me. It had to be a joke. It had to be. My mouth was dry and I coughed nervously. ‘This is a joke, right? Your mates are watching outside or something . . .’

Stu hopped from his perch and knelt in front of me. I had an absurd drunken thought that maybe he was going to whip out a diamond ring from the pocket of his jeans and ask me to marry him. He put his hands on my thighs and I didn’t stop him. His voice was low and serious when he said, ‘This is not a joke. Trust me.’