Four Doors Down(61)
“Becca—”
I cut him off before he can say anything else. “I’ve got to go. Let’s pretend this never happened. Shit, I’m sorry.” I turn and literally run out of there, not being able to get away fast enough.
Great, Becca. Well done. Like my life wasn’t complicated enough.
So far I’ve done pretty well avoiding Ryan. It helps that he’s always surrounded by people. My mom didn’t believe me when I said I was sick for the second day running so I had to come to school. No one seems to know about what happened, which is a relief, but he might just be biding his time and waiting for the perfect moment to humiliate me. Every time he’s called me, I’ve sent his calls to voicemail. I’ve deleted any texts without opening them and I’ve been skipping English so I don’t have to deal with that. He even came over to my house last night, but I was in my room and pretended to be asleep when my mom came upstairs. I am not going to discuss the other day with him; not for his or anyone else’s amusement. As far as I’m concerned, it never happened.
Jay and I are on the sofa in my front room. The TV’s on but I’m trying to concentrate on the Science homework that’s spread across my knees while Jay is using markers to color in a Superman coloring book. I glance over at him and although he’s concentrating intensely, he’s definitely not staying within the lines.
“Mom called me every day this week,” he tells me suddenly, looking up. I smile at him and nod in encouragement. “And I’m going to get to see her again really soon!” he tells me excitedly. I grin at his enthusiasm. I know that my parents spoke to my aunt about her responsibilities and it looks like it may have worked. She definitely seems to be making more of an effort with Jay and apparently rehab is working really well. “And my dad is coming to see me next weekend. Auntie Sarah showed me the email where it said he’s paid for the flights so he’s definitely coming!” He’s grinning at me from ear to ear, clearly delighted.
“That’s great, Jay,” I tell him. I really hope they are getting their act together. I go back to my homework and we’re quiet for a few minutes.
“Can we go see Ryan?” he asks.
My head snaps up to face him, but he’s still staring at his picture. “No,” I say instantly, probably a bit more forcefully than necessary.
“Why?” he asks.
“Because we don’t like him.”
“I do.” He pauses. “And he likes you.”
“Why do you say that?” I ask quickly, again, probably too quickly. My heart starts beating faster.
Jay shrugs nonchalantly, clearly having no idea how I’m now hanging off his every word. “Because when I’m there, he always asks where you are and what you’re doing.”
“He does?”
Jay nods. “Yeah, and who you’re with.” He pauses, looking at me hopefully. “So can we go see him?”
“No,” I reply. My heart’s still beating a mile a minute. He asks Jay about me? What does that mean? Nothing. It means absolutely nothing, I tell myself. He’s just being nice, but for some reason I feel like I want to ask him about it, why he wants to know where I am. But I’m being ridiculous. Knowing Ryan, he’s probably trying to find out information he can use against me at a later date.
Yes, that’s what is it I tell myself.
“Why not, Becca?” Jay’s voice is taking on that whiny tone that I hate.
“I’ll give you five dollars and take you for ice cream if you stop asking to go to Ryan’s,” I tell him.
“Deal!” he shouts back at me excitedly. The kid will do anything for ice cream.
My phone beeps next to me. I glance at it, expecting it to be another text from Ryan, which I can delete immediately, but freeze when I see it’s from Charlie.
Charlie: I’m outside your house.
I stare at the phone for five seconds in surprise. I text him right after I left Ryan’s the other day and told him never to contact me again. He’d tried to call me right away, but when I didn’t answer, he didn’t try again. I have to admit, that hurt. He didn’t even care enough to push me on it. I didn’t tell him I knew about his girlfriend, but I guess he knew the reason. I cried when that reality hit, but I pulled myself together and realized he really wasn’t worth it. The * didn’t deserve anymore of my time or attention, and I refused to let myself wallow in it. To be honest, I’ve been thinking about Ryan a whole lot more that I’ve been thinking about Charlie in the last couple of days.
My phone beeps again.
Charlie: I know you’re at home. I can see your car. Come out.
I stand to look out the window and sure enough, his car is there. He’s looking at the house and has probably seen me. My heart’s suddenly beating fast again. Shit.
“Stay here,” I tell Jay. “I’m just going outside for two minutes and then we’ll go get ice cream.” He nods and I smooth down my hair, hoping I don’t look too much of a wreck. Then I stop myself. I do not need to impress Charlie anymore. I don’t owe him anything.
I leave my house and walk down the drive toward his car. I stop several feet away and he gets out of the car to face me. I cross my arms and look away; I have no idea what to say.