With This Heart(57)

“ That’s it, Abby. Let me touch you.” His words were magic. His fingers were magic.

“ You’re like Houdini,” I moaned, and he let out a low husky laugh. Now that the pain was over, I felt silly for making it such a big deal.

“ It hurt so bad.” I could feel tears drying on my cheeks. I hadn’t even realized I’d cried.

His movements paused and he looked up and met my gaze. “Does it still hurt?”

I wrapped my arms around his back and dragged my nails across his skin. Not hard enough to draw blood, but hard enough for him to realize that I was no longer in pain.

With one sweet groan, he pushed all the way inside of me. My head fell back against the pillow as I tried to get accustomed to the feel of him. All of him pressing against every single part of me.

After another moment he started rocking his hips, making sure to keep the pace gentle enough so that he wouldn’t hurt me. His fingers, slick with remnants of us, rubbed my clit with gentle circles, edging to the exact spot that made my insides tumble upside-down. I ground up to meet him, pressing us together harder until his finger swiped once more and I exploded into tiny little pieces. It wasn’t like last time, coming with him inside of me felt carnal. I came harder and longer, as if my body had something to hold onto to make the pleasure last as long as possible.

“ Beck,” I heard myself moaning as he kept thrusting into me harder. It still felt tight, but his movements didn’t hurt. My body accepted him more than willingly and I watched with wonder as his face contorted from absolute control to absolute bliss. He came with a hard thrust into me. His stomach muscles clenched in tandem and his groan was sexy enough to almost bring me to another climax.

“ Holy hell, Abby,” he groaned, stretching each syllable into a love letter. He let some of his weight fall on top of me, and I stared up at the ceiling feeling all things at once, but mostly I felt wholeheartedly in love with this boy.





[page]CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE





So our start time was slightly later than I had planned, but we still made it to our destination before dinner time. Odessa, Texas. Home of football. Football. And more football. Traveling to Odessa was the whole reason the road trip came about in the first place. Everything else had been fluff. Really nice Beck-filled fluff. It felt less momentous traveling without my urn, but I didn’t regret smashing it. It was a symbol of my oppression, and now that it was gone, I felt one step closer to being free.


“ So where do we head from here?” Beck asked, pulling into a convenience store parking lot so that we could plot out our journey. I pulled my wallet out of my purse and retrieved the slip of paper that Alyssa had given me at my doctor’s office. The piece of paper that could get my doctor, Alyssa, and the hospital, all in major trouble. I had to use it wisely.

Once the address was staring up at me with its black ink, I turned to look at Beck. He was wearing the baseball cap he’d worn that first time I’d met him. His face was easy and open; a small smile dotted the side of his mouth. His default setting was happy. That’s what I loved about Beck. He looked at life like it was a journey, like we were meant to enjoy every step of the way. Idling in a convenience store parking lot was a treat. Caroline didn’t get to idle anymore, so I was glad that Beck didn’t take it for granted.

“ This piece of paper has the address of a house that we’re here to visit.” I introduced the subject to him lightly, unsure of how he would take it.

He nodded his head, his hazel eyes falling in and out of the shadow of his hat’s brim. “Ooh..kay,” he answered, obviously hoping for more information.

“ We’re borderline breaking the law, but you know, it shouldn’t be a big deal. So just head to Main Street and then we’ll—”

“ Slow your roll. ‘Breaking the law’? How? Do you have a restraining order with these people or something?” he asked, slightly kidding.

“ What do you take me for?” I gawked at him as he put the Camper in drive.

“ A sexy, slightly-dysfunctional girl,” he answered with a smirk as he turned left out of the parking lot.

I smiled at the first part of his comment and chose to ignore the rest. “We’re going to see the kid’s parents, who y’know, donated my heart,” I answered under my breath, hoping the music would drown out my confession.

“ What?! We’re going to visit the family? Do they know we’re coming?”

I slashed my hand in the air to silence his worries. “Those are all minor details. I’m not going to spill the beans to them. I just want to talk to them. I feel like I have some right to know about the kid whose heart is now pumping oxygenated blood around my body.”

I plugged in the address from the paper into my phone and told Beck to turn left in half a mile.

“ So we’re going to do what exactly?”

“ Maybe scout it out a little bit first,” I answered, absolutely clueless as to how the plan would pull through in the end.

“ Aren’t there ways to go about contacting the family?” Beck asked gently.

“ Yes, Mr. Moral Compass. There are ways, but it takes forever and it’s not a guarantee that the family will establish communication.”

“ You make it sound like adoption,” Beck smiled, slowing to stop at a light.