Present Perfect(32)

Wiping the tears away with the back of my sleeve, I tried to steady my breathing. I hadn’t noticed how out of breath I was until I was still.

I should have kept moving, because once I stopped my mind went into overdrive.

I was losing Noah. Our friendship wasn’t enough for him anymore. I wasn’t enough for him anymore. I knew this would happen someday. I just didn’t think it would be today, and I sure as hell didn’t think it would be with Beth. I felt betrayed, angry, and tossed aside. I didn’t answer Beth when she asked if I was pissed because they lied or because they were together. Truth is I got over being lied to three seconds after I heard her say she loved him.

I didn’t want them to be together. I wasn’t ready. I knew I couldn’t have him, but I didn’t want anyone else to have him either, not yet. I know that’s irrational, but logical thinking was not part of my life right now. I can’t lose him. He’s the only thing that’s all mine.





Sex is a game changer, even when you’re not the one having it.





I bolted up and looked at the clock. It was only 5 pm. People don’t have sex at 5 o’clock in the evening. That’s dinner time. They wait until it’s good and dark. I knew that was stupid and not true, but it calmed me somewhat knowing I had time to shut down Beth’s sex dinner.

I hurried out of bed and ran to the bathroom. I washed my face free of the tear streaks, put some mascara on, and a little lip gloss. I was out the back door in a flash. I walked to the fence that separated our backyard from the Stewart’s. I could see Noah through the window. He was pacing back and forth talking on his cellphone. There was a strange look on his face that I couldn’t read. He ran his free hand through his hair a couple of times as he looked out the window at nothing in particular. He didn’t notice me staring at him, he was too focused on his phone call.

I jumped the fence and ran up to the Stewart’s back door. It was unlocked as usual, so I let myself in as usual. Noah was standing in the family room, talking. “Alright. I will. I know.” He sounded irritated at whoever was on the other end of the phone. My guess was Beth. He looked at me, flashed a quick smile in my direction. “I need to go.” He ended the call without saying goodbye.

“Hey Tweet.” He tried to sound cheerful.

“Hey, hey, hey.” I tried to match his cheerful sound.

“Everything okay?” he asked.

“Yep.” I popped the p when I said it. I was waiting for him to bring up the subject.

I walked over to behind the sofa and leaned back on it. “What’cha want to do tonight? Since both our parents our gone for the weekend, the world is our oyster. We can hang out the whole time.” I took my cellphone out of my pocket and scrolled through my numbers. “Pepperoni with extra cheese good for you?”

“What?” It looked as if my question startled him.

“On our pizza. Pepperoni and extra cheese?”

“Yeah. That’s fine.”

I pressed the number and brought the phone to my ear.

Noah rubbed the back of his neck a few times before interrupting my call. “Um… Tweet… I kind of have plans tonight.”

“What kind of plans?” I asked innocently, as I put my phone away.

There was a pause that felt like it lasted a year and a half. Noah was standing a few feet away from me, arms crossed over his chest, looking down at a spot on the floor.

“I sort of have a date,” he said in a low voice.

“A date? With who?”

He looked at me through his long dark lashes. A smirk played across his face. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Play dumb. You’re no good at it. Besides, I just got off the phone with Beth.”

“Did ya now? Are you referring to your girlfriend, Beth?” I tried not to sound sarcastic, but I wasn’t very successful.

“I’m sorry. I’ve been meaning to talk to you about it,” he said, sheepishly.

“So talk.”

Noah motioned for me to sit on the sofa. I shook my head. I didn’t want to sit and relax. I wanted to stay standing in case running was in my near future. We both stayed in our spots.

“I don’t know where to start,” he said.

“How about where you lied to me.”

“I’ve never lied to you.”

“Lie of omission! That’s just as bad.”

He shook his head, “Look, I know you’re upset.”

“GENIUS!” I threw my arms up in the air.

“Would you please shut your mouth and listen for five seconds. It’s not a big deal.”

“What’s not a big deal?”

“This thing with Beth. It’s...,” he ran his hand up and down his face in frustration. “No matter what I say, I’m going to sound like the biggest dick in the world. I already know that, so keep your smartass comments to yourself,” he paused. “This thing with Beth is just convenient.”

My eyebrows and the pitch of my voice both shot up when I said, “Convenient?”

“Yeah. We’ve known each other for a long time. I knew she wanted something to happen between us.”

Just hearing those words coming out of his mouth made my stomach churn. “Why was I kept in the dark about this?”