No Kissing Allowed (No Kissing Allowed #1)(58)

I’d finally found my perfect person, my other half, and now he was leaving. How would we survive that kind of separation? And then even if we were to get married, I’d have to move there, away from my family. I loved Aidan, but maybe love wasn’t enough.





Chapter Thirty


I didn’t want to go to the airport. I didn’t want to say that final good-bye, kiss his lips one final time. I wanted to wallow in my bed for three weeks until he returned to me, but relationships were not solo things. He needed me to be there, to see him walk away from me, and so we walked hand in hand into the airport, my heart breaking little by little with each step.

Aidan didn’t say a word the entire ride over, like there were no words for this, no speech that could make it all right. It wasn’t all right. He was leaving, and I was staying, and nothing could ever make it all right.

JFK was as crowded as ever, the intense winter air outside making the airport seem even more cramped and hot. I yanked off my scarf, frustrated that I’d put it on, then my coat, then started for my sweater when Aidan stopped me. “I’m sorry.”

I looked up at him. We were just outside security, as far as I could walk with him. “It isn’t your fault I put on seven layers of clothing,” I said, attempting to smile, but my mouth wouldn’t quite work right.

He ignored my attempt at humor, his gaze on me, refusing to let go. “I’m sorry I agreed to London. I’m sorry I didn’t try harder. I’m sorry I haven’t told you a thousand times how much you mean to me. Because you do. You mean everything to me. And if you tell me you don’t want me to go, then I’ll stay. For you, I’ll stay.”

My gaze dropped, my throat closing up. I told myself I wouldn’t cry here. That I would say good-bye to him with a smile on my face, a positive attitude…and then I’d bury myself in my bed for the rest of the weekend. But as I took in his misery, I couldn’t keep my feelings hidden any longer.

“I don’t want you to go. But I don’t want you to stay, either. I know what that will mean to your career, and I can’t do that to you. You’re a legend, Aidan Truitt.” I blinked away tears and smiled up at him. “That legend isn’t dying today.”

He pulled me to him, kissing the top of my head, then cupping my face with his hands, he pressed his lips to mine. “Three weeks?”

“It’s nothing.” It was everything.

“And we’ll talk every day.”

“Numerous times a day.” And it still wouldn’t be enough.

He checked his watch, the time looming closer to his departure. “I have to go,” he said.

“I know.”

“I don’t want to go.”

“I know that, too.”

My heart sank as I peered up at him, wishing I could erase the sadness on his face, the worry lines that were etched around his eyes, the deep frown on his perfect mouth. “I’ll miss you,” I said finally, rising up to kiss him again.

“Every day.”

And then our time had expired, and he walked away, disappearing in the crowd.





Chapter Thirty-One


I lay on my bed, Grace on one side of me, Lauren the other, while Richard Gere told Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman that the apartment was the best he could offer, and though I knew it was just a movie and life was so much more complicated, I couldn’t help comparing it to my life. Because it had been two weeks since Aidan left for London, me standing strong at the airport while his plane took off, carrying him away from me. I didn’t cry until I was outside, and then it took me another week to finally stop.

“I’ve seen this movie a thousand times, and every time, I get sad when ‘It Must Have Been Love’ starts to play,” Grace said. “God, what a sad song.”

The song began to play as if on cue, and Lauren reached for my hand, somehow sensing this could be my undoing.

“When do you see him again?” Lauren asked. She didn’t look at me when she asked the question. She knew me so well.

“One more week.”

“That’s not that long.”

It was an eternity. Already, the two weeks apart had been hard. I missed talking to him about my day, discovering his thoughts on new campaigns, watching movies and sleeping cuddled close. It was weird how we settled into our routines, how we grew comfortable with the people in our lives. So when they left, they took a little piece of you with them and you never felt whole again until they returned.

And that’s where I was—a half person. Realizing the people in our lives were what mattered, not our jobs, not our successes. The people.

My phone vibrated against my stomach, and I peered down to see a text from Aidan, asking if I was around to FaceTime. We’d gotten into the habit of FaceTiming daily, and it helped. But it also made it worse.

Grace and Lauren waved that they were going to leave my room. The movie was over anyway. Richard Gere came for Julia Roberts, and they kissed, and all was perfect in the world. If only life could be so simple…

I answered the FaceTime call on the first ring, and there he was, in his bed, his blond locks messy and wet, and my heart clenched even tighter, my eyes burning, but I never allowed myself to cry on these calls. I didn’t want to ruin the few moments we had.

“How was work today?” he asked.