No Kissing Allowed (No Kissing Allowed #1)(54)

“It is.”

I hesitated, but if I didn’t get it out now, I never would. “I’m sorry, it’s not enough for me. I have to know this is going somewhere. I…” I sucked in a breath, tears pricking my eyes, but I couldn’t deny this any longer. “I don’t want to be with anyone else. I want you. But…I want a husband more. I want kids. I want to grow old with someone and watch our kids grow up. I want a lifetime.”

He took a step back, shutting down. “You know I can’t offer you that.”

“Why? How do you know you can’t?”

“I’ve been honest from the beginning, and if you’re going to keep demanding things from me that I can’t give, then it’s best we end this now. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“But you are hurting me. You’re not even trying.”

“I am trying. It’s just not enough for you.”

“No, you’re letting your fear of failure control your life. You decide what kind of man you’re going to be. One day at a time, you decide your future. Whether or not you turn into your father is up to you.” And then with one long look at him, one last chance for him to ask me to stay, I walked away.





Chapter Twenty-Eight


“Cameron,” Gayle said from the doorway to the break room. “We have a new client arriving in fifteen. Do you think you could sit in on the meeting?”

I nodded. “Sure.”

She smiled. “Fantastic. See you in there.”

It was Monday after Christmas break, and it had taken every ounce of my strength to go into the office. I brought the photo of Dad and me home and set it on my nightstand, needing him with me. His face, the person he’d been and the person he wanted me to be, was the only reason I managed to get out of bed.

It had been three days without a single word from Aidan, and though I’d broken down and sent him a text, he hadn’t replied. At this point, I had no idea what we were anymore, if anything at all.

The door to the break room opened, and I peered over to see Alexa rushing in. “Guess what?” she exclaimed.

I shook my head. “What?”

She pulled back, studying my face. “Why do you look so miserable?”

“What? Oh…I was disappointed to leave my family.”

She shrugged, and I realized she did that a lot. Like whatever I said wasn’t important enough to cause her more thought. It grated on my nerves, but I didn’t say anything. “Gayle just told me that she wasn’t hiring just yet, but as soon as a position opened up, it would be mine! Me. I can almost see the title behind my name now. And the money! Geez, I could really use the money.”

Not to disappoint her, but we lowly account managers didn’t make much money. Surely she didn’t expect some massive increase, right? By the look on her face, I’d say that was exactly what she expected. Sighing, I went to make my coffee when my phone buzzed with a text. I fumbled to check the call, only to find a new text from Mom.

I shoved my phone back into my pocket, wishing Aidan would respond with something, anything, so I wouldn’t feel so lost. “Are they expanding, then?” I asked Alexa, eager to talk about something to get my mind off Aidan. “I think I’m Gayle’s only account manager.”

“You are. Do you have any skeletons in your closet I can exploit?” She started laughing, and I glared at her. “I’m kidding. Well, I’m off to prove I rock. See you around.”

I stared after her, shaking my head. Aidan and I were over now, so I didn’t have any skeletons to worry about. Pushing out of the break room, I started down the hall, hopeful that I could make it to my cube without—

My thoughts cut short as my gaze locked on his. We were six feet from each other, no more, but never had I felt further away from him. His mouth opened, and then his gaze found the floor, and I knew without him having to say anything that we had passed into the awkward after zone. I was an idiot to text him and hope we could resolve things. Clearly, for him, we were already done.

“Cameron…”

“See you in the meeting.” I walked around him and sat down at my desk, my hands trembling. My phone buzzed again, and I prepared to quickly text Mom back that I’d call her later when my gaze locked on the text.

Aidan: I’m sorry.

I wanted to ask him for which part, but I was afraid that if I started the conversation I wouldn’t be able to stop without ending up in tears, and I refused to cry here. For now, I had to push this aside, ignore him, go back to the way things were before. But how could I go back?

I couldn’t.

Thankfully, the meeting with the new client went well, and the rest of the day breezed by, Aidan in and out of meetings all day, so I barely saw him, saving me from any more painful run-ins. It had gotten late fast, and, exhausted, I started for the elevator, finally comfortable enough to ride it again, when Aidan slipped in after me. “Wait.” He leaned into me as the elevator began to drop. “I didn’t want you to ride alone.”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you? Because I’m not. I thought about what you said all weekend. That I decide the man I want to be. And I don’t want to be the kind of man who hurts you, who walks away from you. I don’t want this to end. Anything is possible if we’re willing to fight for it. And I am, Cameron. You asked me to try. Now I’m asking you to do the same. I miss you. I—”