It's All Relative(89)
Her grandmother sighed. “It probably wouldn’t stop him from dropping in all the time anyway. The boy has a heart as big as yours.” Jessie’s eyes refocused on Grams; she could feel the tiny tears stinging them, and hoped her grandmother didn’t notice.
The pressure grew beneath her lids as images of Kai bombarded her. Knowing she wouldn’t be able to contain the moisture much longer, Jessie looked away. After a few tears released, Jessie quickly swiped her cheeks dry. Her grandmother placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, and Jessie knew the pretense of being okay was gone. “Are you all right, Jessica?”
No longer trying to hide the fact that she was brushing tears from her skin, Jessie faced Grams with a sad smile on her lips. Her heart thudded as she thought of something acceptable that she could say to explain her overly emotional state. It had to be believable, but it couldn’t be anything about Kai. “Of course. It’s just…I’m leaving…for a few days…and I’m going to worry so much about you.”
Grams smiled as she wrapped her in a tight hug. Jessie felt a little guilty for saying it, but just a little. There was a lot of truth to the statement. Even though she wasn’t going to be gone long, Jessie would worry about her grandmother. “Oh, you sweet thing, don’t you worry about me. You just go out and have a good time. Enjoy the life you’ve been given.” They pulled apart, and Jessie hastily brushed her cheeks dry again. She needed to get a hold of herself, but that was easier said than done. The pain of Kai’s absence was a physical discomfort, an irreparable hole in her heart.
“Where are you off to?” her grandmother asked with a bright smile.
Thinking about April and how awful this upcoming trip might be did nothing to perk up Jessie’s mood. “My roommates and I are going skiing next weekend. Things have been sort of awkward at the house lately, so we’re all taking a little mini-vacation.”
Her grandmother smiled, like she suddenly understood why Jessie was down. Yes, she supposed her troubles at home could explain her odd tears, but that really wasn’t it. Wanting to change subjects, or maybe not talk at all for a little bit, Jessie started preparing the toppings for the potato bar. Grams watched her with thoughtful eyes, then she lifted a finger in the air, like she’d just had a revelation. “You should take Kai skiing with you.”
Jessie’s heart froze into one solid chunk. She’d love to take Kai with her this weekend. She’d love to teach him to ski during the day, and would love to hang out with him in the lodge at night. She’d love every single second of it, more than she should, and that was the problem. “Um…well…” She didn’t know how to tell her grandmother that it wasn’t possible, that they’d cut all communication, that they couldn’t see each other anymore. Her sadness returned tenfold as she stared at the ground. “It’s a girl thing, Grams.”
Her grandmother let out a soft sigh, and Jessie peeked up at her. “I know it’s a girl’s weekend, Jessica, but Kai has never seen that much snow up close, and he’s always wanted to learn how to ski.” Smiling, she shook her head. “When he was younger, he used to pretend he was slalom racing in the backyard.”
A ghost of a smile drifted across Jessie’s face, then she frowned. How could she turn down her grandmother? How could she say yes though? “I don’t know…April will be there.” She worried her lip, hoping her grandmother accepted that and dropped the matter.
She didn’t. “Kai tells me the relationship ended amicably, and they still speak often. Surely April wouldn’t mind his presence for just a couple of days?” Jessie opened her mouth to say something, anything, but Grams was done with mild requests. “Please, Jessica? For me? He’s been having such a hard time lately. There’s a sadness that just won’t leave him. I’m worried. He could really use the pick-me-up. He needs you…please take him with you.”
Jessie felt her eyes watering again. “He’s been down?”
Jessie knew her tone had come out much too hopeful when she saw her grandmother frown. Jessie didn’t really want Kai to be distraught, she just wanted to know this was tough for him too. With a shake of her head, Grams sighed. “He’s so melancholy lately. This is just what he needs right now.” Her lips firmed, and she nodded, like her mind was made up, and no matter what Jessie said, Kai would be going on the trip.
Jessie’s heart raced as she started pulling potatoes out of the hot oven. Oh God…she was going to see Kai again, or hear from him, at least. What would he say, what would he do? Would he agree to come? Would they get one last weekend together? And…was that a good thing, or a truly horrible idea? Either way, it was pointless for Jessie to keep objecting. “Fine, Grandma, I’ll ask him.” Setting the spuds on a plate in front of her, Jessie carefully pulled back the tin foil encasing them. Studying her work, she nonchalantly said, “He’ll probably say no though. He’s busy with stuff.” That would be for the best. He shouldn’t go. Too much could go wrong, and even a flawless trip would be devastating.
Peeking up, Jessie watched as a sly smile crossed her grandmother’s lips. Jessie knew that look, and her heart sank. Her grandmother wasn’t going to let this go. She’d persist until Kai was at the lodge with them. “Nonsense, I won’t let him say no.” As Jessie felt all the blood rush from her face, leaving her cold and pale, her grandmother’s smile widened. “Life is short, Jessica Marie, and you and Kai…you both need to learn to seize opportunities as they arise.”