Absolution(72)

He straightened up and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. His entire body felt like an over-coiled spring. He tried to relax his shoulders and turned to resume his pacing across the room.

“Callum – “

“Don’t tell me to calm down, and don’t tell me to sit,” he snapped, with more force than he meant.

Tom wisely backed down and Callum was grateful. He strode past him again and leaned against the wall at the opposite end of the room, staring at the floor.

Whatever it was that he’d missed, it was big. Big enough that Ally didn’t feel like she could talk to him about it. He had failed her. She needed Jack, not him. His heart sank as the truth seeped in. It didn’t matter what he did, he wasn’t Jack – even after the past twelve months, after all they had been through together.

He stood up and crossed the room to stand in front of Tom. “Call him – now. Tell him.”

Tom stood up slowly. “No.”

“Tell him he needs to get his ass back here – pronto.” When Tom opened his mouth to object, he cut him off. “I mean it. This has gone on long enough. He needs to come home – she needs him,” he said, pointing desperately towards the ER treatment room where Ally was currently having her stomach pumped.

“And you think that telling Jack what happened would help?”

“Yes!” he cried, his emotions bubbling to the surface. “I don’t know why the hell she did this, but if Jack were here it wouldn’t have happened – he wouldn’t have let it happen!”

Tom sighed and put a comforting hand on Callum’s shoulder. He shrugged it off irritably and backed up, sinking into a plastic chair opposite him, exhausted suddenly.

“He’d have stopped it, he’d have seen it. I didn’t. I missed it – I missed it and she nearly – “

He shook his head, staring down at the linoleum beneath his feet. Tom sat down beside him. The smell of Lysol leaked into Callum’s despair, making his stomach heave.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Tom said. “I missed it too. And telling Jack now wouldn’t make any difference. It wouldn’t change anything.”

“He needs to be here – she needs him. It’s time he grew up and came home.”

Tom was silent for a moment, then he put his hand on Callum’s shoulder and squeezed. “Don’t you think that if I could bring him home, I would’ve done it by now? I don’t even know where the hell he is.”

A thousand fears swirled around inside Callum’s head, but he couldn’t bring himself to voice a single one of them.



Jack sipped a steaming cup of coffee, staring over the table at the empty space across from him. Ally had yet to come out of her bedroom and he was beginning to wonder if she was waiting for him to leave.

His jaw set. He wasn’t going anywhere. It was about time she realised that. It was no use asking him to stay if she was just going to hide from him. All in, all the time, no matter what.

He finally heard her bedroom door open and a few moments later, she appeared in the kitchen doorway. He tried to smile casually, although he felt anything but relaxed.

“I made coffee – strong coffee. Want some?”

She nodded, rolling into the room while he got up to pour her a cup.

“Here you go,” he said, setting down the cup on the table across from him a few moments later.

“Thanks.”

She placed a bottle of aspirin on the table, tentatively wrapping her hands around the cup.

He eyed the bottle. “How’s your head?”

“Not great, but I’ll live,” she said, rubbing her temples. “I had all these weird dreams last night. Crazy stuff. Must’ve been the beer. Dreamt I was dancing.”

He smiled. “That wasn’t a dream.”

“It wasn’t?”

“Nope.”

He took a gulp of coffee that sounded way too loud.

“I don’t usually drink these days,” she said after a few moments. “It all happened so fast – one minute I just had a little buzz on, the next… ”

He smiled, grateful she was at least talking to him. “But you remember dancing?”

“Yeah. I wish I remembered more of that, to be honest.”

“We’re just gonna have to try that again when we’re sober, then.”

She blushed but didn’t comment. He wondered if she remembered the kiss they shared, but he didn’t want to risk asking.