Forbidden Falls (Virgin River #9)(49)

And then something occurred to him. “Ellie, can I ask you a very personal question?” he asked.

“Knock yourself out,” she said. “It’s not like I have anything private left. I’ve told you pretty much everything.”

Still, it took him a moment. “Your job. Your dancing job. Did you like it?”

She looked across the front seat at him while he kept his eyes focused on the road. “Yeah,” she said. “It was an okay job.” Then she took a breath and decided to cut him some slack. “Okay, it wasn’t the taking-off-your clothes part I was crazy about. That’s something you do in private for a husband or lover. I was doing it for money, and getting leered at by strange men doesn’t turn me on. In fact, if you don’t fight it real hard, it can be humiliating.

“But there was stuff to like,” she went on. “First of all, there were some real nice girls there. They weren’t all great—some were a pain in the butt. But I got kind of close to a couple of girls, and I liked the bouncer and his wife, and the owner. The owner is a good guy, always watching out for everyone. He kept a clean club, he didn’t want a big hassle from the cops, so it was drug-free. If he caught anyone using or turning tricks on the side, they were gone. And the customers were careful because Clint, the bouncer, was a bulldog. All I had to do was wiggle around a lot and get down to a thong. And for that, I had money, protection and friends. To a girl like me—that’s living large.”

A girl like me? “How long did you work there?”

“Not quite three months. And before you ask, it’s the only job like that I ever had. I did secretary work, waitressed, cleaned houses and offices, worked nights at the convenience store, worked on a shipping dock at a big retailer’s for a while. But that club job paid the best and the hours were good for a mother. And get this—it came with benefits. I hated letting go of the benefits.”

“But didn’t you ever have to do things you didn’t like?”

“I didn’t like taking my clothes off,” she stressed. “But, that was the job and I needed that job.”

“What about things like, you know, lap dances?” he asked.

“Oh, my goodness, Your Reverence! You know about lap dances?”

“Don’t screw with me,” he said. “It wasn’t easy to ask…”

“Isn’t screw a swearword?” she taunted.

“It’s on the cusp. So?”

It was her turn to be quiet for a second. “You really want to know?”

He turned and met her eyes briefly. “If you don’t mind telling me, I’d like to know how it affected you. That’s all.”

“Well, Noah, it was like this,” she said. He’d already learned that when she called him by his name, she was about to be both serious and candid. “That was also part of the job. I didn’t take off the thong and they weren’t allowed to put hands on me, but it was awful. I hated it. That’s another thing you do for a husband or lover, a man you’ve given your heart and commitment to, not for a paying customer. So what I had to do was turn off my brain. Send my mind to another place. I learned to think about jets and ocean liners and hot-air balloons rather than what I was doing. And when it was over, I totally forgot about it. I scrubbed the details from my mind—the face, the smile, the smell of him, everything. And I never remember again. I do not ever once think about a lap dance.”

He didn’t say anything.

“Anything else about my life there that you want to know?”

“Why jets and ocean liners and hot-air balloons?”

“Because I’ve never been anywhere. I’ve never been on a trip. I’ve never been high up, except in a building or on a bridge. I’ve never traveled or had adventures. Whenever I’m in a bad place, I take a little trip in my head. My gramma used to say, ‘You don’t need a lot of money to live a full life—all you need is a fertile mind, some books and a good attitude. Books are free at the library, but a fertile mind takes practice.’”

He chuckled. “Ellie, your grandmother must have been incredible. I wish I could’ve met her.”

She sighed. “She totally rocked. I miss her so much sometimes.” She swallowed. “Seems unfair sometimes. Jason…My gramma…Two people I loved so much are already gone.”

Noah did an uncharacteristic thing. He reached across the front seat and grabbed her hand, giving it a squeeze. Because he understood that.

Noah had several appointments the following week. One was sheer fun—meeting with Shelby MacIntyre and Luke Riordan to discuss their wedding. The second meeting was a bigger challenge for him. Paul and Vanessa needed some counseling while they tried to make a decision about Hannah. And the third meeting was a coffee date with a nurse named Gloria. He’d been putting off that last one as long as he could.

When Noah met with Shelby and Luke, he felt as if the smile was permanently frozen on his face, they were so delightful. One look told him they weren’t a perfect match; Luke was considerably older than Shelby and their personalities were very different. Two minutes with them proved his first impression wrong.

“The most important thing about this wedding is Luke’s family,” Shelby said. “My family is already here. They’re not going anywhere. But Luke’s mother is a widow who’s been waiting forever for her boys to settle down, and two of Luke’s four brothers have been serving in the Middle East. There’s a weekend in early October when we can get everyone together. If the church is going to be ready, we’d like to do it here, where we’re going to make our home. And then we’ll have a fancy catered dinner in a big tent in Uncle Walt’s pasture beside the river, at the foot of the mountains. It sounds casual, but dinner will be served on china, there will be flowers everywhere and a wooden floor for dancing. I was for something small, but Vanni wants the wedding to be spectacular.”