Stop Anxiety from Stopping You: The Breakthrough Program For Conquering Panic and Social Anxiety(7)

Every single person I have had the privilege of working with who suffered from anxiety or panic has told me that deep down they know whether something is anxiety or a true physical emergency or crisis. This is especially true the more panic or anxiety attacks you have had. No one can be 100% sure they are in perfect physical health, and that is how anxiety takes advantage of your vulnerability. It is probably something that you are willing to accept at most other times, since the only other option is to live in an isolation chamber hooked up to machines that will monitor you around the clock!

There is really no need for that. You know exactly what anxiety feels like. You have felt the panic before. You know exactly what the symptoms feel like in your body. And if you are feeling something that is different, that is the only time you need to seek a medical consultation.



Lie Number 2: I will pass out and embarrass or hurt myself.

The Truth: This is another common fear that I hear about in my practice. It is particularly nagging if you also experience social anxiety (the fear that any embarrassing situation will be magnified and that you will suffer a great loss of face, reputation, or even become ousted from your social or professional circle).

It is virtually impossible to pass out during a panic attack. In order to pass out, your blood pressure needs to drop. This is the opposite of what happens during a panic attack; your blood pressure rises. It is the first piece of education that I give my clients, and sadly, many have come to me after repeated consults with physicians and even mental health professionals and have not been informed of this.

The only exception that I am aware of on the entire spectrum of anxiety problems during which people can pass out are persons who have needle phobia, which is a fear of blood draws or getting medical shots or vaccinations.

Of course, anxiety tries to perpetuate this lie by demanding that you feel 100% sure this is not going to happen – which is impossible. We simply cannot rule out the possibility that someone will pass out. However, in this case, it will likely be due to a reason other than having a panic attack. I encourage you to remind yourself that you have an anxiety disorder and not a passing out disorder!



Lie Number 3: This will never end.

In your mind, this lie may sound like this: “My day or week is ruined. There we go again!” or “I will always be controlled by panic,” or “I feel a little anxious now, but it is probably going to get worse.”



The Truth: The truth is that even without any interference or help from us, the maximum panic response duration is about ten minutes. I understand that this in and of itself may feel like a lifetime, but this is not what most people fear. The fear is that once a panic attack starts it will bring on a long and stressful cycle of anxiety that will last a day, several days, or even weeks.

I have time and again received a raised eyebrow or a quizzical look from clients who assure me that they can have a panic attack go on for days. What is happening, once we get to the heart of the matter, is that they are cycling between lower and higher levels of anxiety without truly reaching a panic attack. (I will cover what to do about that later in the book.)

I invite you to think about your panic attack like an eye twitch; it is simply a physiological reaction. If you have ever had an eye twitch that came out of the blue, it probably felt very annoying. Typically, the more attention and energy we give it, the more stressed we become, the less likely the eye twitch is to go away. It is only when we accept it and let our body take care of it on its own that our emotional distress (feeling irritated or annoyed) is reduced and our physiology self-corrects at its own pace.

If ten minutes is still far too long for you, there are techniques you can use that will grind this cycle to a halt much faster. This will only be true once you understand and have mastered the anxiety mind game. If you believe that panic will not harm you, you will be in a position to let your body reset without interference from you. If you are still not convinced, you may have believed the following anxiety lie.



Lie Number 4: Anxiety is dangerous or “bad for me.”

The Truth: Anxiety is not dangerous. Neither is panic. If you are able to get your heart rate up doing routine physical tasks like exercise, then there is absolutely nothing dangerous about your heart rate going up when you have a panic attack.

What is true is that feeling anxious and feeling excited are physiological mirror images – they are identical when it comes to your body’s response. Your heart starts beating faster, and your breathing gets a little shallower, your body temperature goes up and you start feeling warmer, and you may get butterflies in your stomach. Both anxiety and excitement have this in common; it is only the mind game that is different.

Imagine for a moment the last time you felt excited about something. Your thoughts were probably something like, “I hope this goes well; this is going to be so much fun; what a great idea!” These excited thoughts were naturally positive. Now recall the last time that you felt anxious. Your thoughts probably sounded negative and maybe a bit like this: “Oh-oh! I hope nothing bad will happen; what if it does not go well? What if I mess up?” If anxiety and excitement are physiologically the same, and it is only your thoughts that are different, then changing your thoughts or how you look at and interpret your anxiety symptoms is what helps you win the mind game!

So now for the big question: is all this anxiety harmful? At the very core, anxiety tells you “yes” and that you had better follow the rules and lies that it has laid out for you. You may have grown up in a home where strong emotions were seen as dangerous, or even heard a wellmeaning caregiver tell you to “save your nerves.” As you may have guessed, I do not believe anxiety is dangerous. In fact, anxiety, like any other emotion, has a very important function: it is there to get your attention so that you can complete the tasks that you need in a timely manner, and to preserve your life through the “fight or flight response,” which when it misfires is what we call panic.