Confessions of a Curious Bookseller(58)
Fawn, Owner
From: Fawn Windsor
Sent: Fri, Mar 15, 2019 at 7:18 PM
To: Gregory Harris
Subject: Springtime Greetings!
Dear Gregory,
Ah, the beginnings of spring! The snow has melted, and the horses are shaking off their wintry dispositions. The birds in the barns are cooing, coaxing the burgeoning sun to its grandeur.
The weather is fine, but the situation at the estate has become rather questionable. My younger brother, Gordon, has been missing for over a month! Do not take the exclamation point the wrong way—it is not my intention to cheapen the news with hyperbole. I am merely trying to translate my shock. Gordon was never much of an adventurer. He spent most of his time in one place: Russia. He studied Turgenev with a Fulbright scholarship and when that ended, he went back each year, having fallen in love with the drinking of vodka and with the various Russian men and women (but mostly women, if you know what I mean). Am I surprised he is missing? Yes, I am—but I would not be surprised if he showed up at my door saying that he squandered all the money our father had given him to pursue his studies in Moscow. I hope he is all right.
Truth be told, the countryside of England in the springtime can be a bit lonely. I wonder if it is all the melting that gives me this strange sinking feeling that my life is slipping away from me. I am getting older—it is just the reality of it, as I’m sure you understand. But being surrounded by servants and stable workers gives me a strange sense that I am useless—merely a figurehead of sorts with nothing worthwhile to do. I’m considering letting some of my servants go permanently. It isn’t money so much as it’s that I feel like I have grown completely out of touch with my own surroundings. Perhaps fluffing some pillows and dusting the chandeliers would help get me back on track, but I’m not sure.
For the first time in my life, I look around this grand place and wonder if this is the very best thing for me.
Much love,
Fawn Windsor
From: Gregory Harris
Sent: Sat, Mar 16, 2019 at 8:13 AM
To: Fawn Windsor
Re: Springtime Greetings!
Hi there, my dear,
I’m so sorry to hear about your brother. I hope they find him soon. I’ll keep my fingers crossed that he’s simply at the bottom of a bottle somewhere in a swanky out-of-the-way Russian hotel, cozying up with lovely women, good books, and cigarettes.
I know what you mean, as I am also throwing into question everything I’ve built these many years. This happens to me, though, around this time of year. I get itchy for change. I begin to ask myself if flipping buildings is really the right path to have taken in life. But is there a right path? Because if so, such a notion assumes that there is something predestined about life, that there is something pulling the strings for us, and despite the desperate pulling and corralling, we dumb humans go the other way. It could be true, since my whole life I’ve felt as if I always zigged when I should have zagged. Not that I’m unhappy. But I think it’s healthy to question, as much as possible, whether or not you are content.
I believe, wholly, that we are allowed to change our paths if we want to, and we do not have to feel guilty about it. But putting that into practice is hard. All I’m saying, my dear, is that if you are tired of running your father’s estate and the status quo no longer makes you happy, you have every right to walk down a different path. I certainly wouldn’t blame you. So many people don’t have that ability because of money, family obligations, or illness. Some people are entirely trapped where they are in life, but inversely you seem to be free. Unmoor yourself, my dear, if you wish. Do it for those who can’t, and ask yourself: What does make you happy?
Nothing new for me. Spring tends to make me a bit sad until I start to see the first daffodils pushing up in the park.
Much love,
Gregory
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Sat, Mar 16, 2019 at 9:30 PM
To: Kyle Krazinsky
Subject: Job Performance Meeting
Kyle,
Please come in a bit earlier tomorrow (say 7:30?) so that we can sit down together and discuss your future with the company.
Many thanks,
Fawn, Owner
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Sat, Mar 16, 2019 at 9:33 PM
To: Sam Asimov
Subject: Job Performance Meeting
Sam,
Please come in a bit earlier tomorrow (say 7:45?) so that we can sit down together and discuss your future with the company.
Many thanks,
Fawn, Owner
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Mon, Mar 18, 2019 at 8:19 AM
To: Angela Washington
Subject: Coffee
Dear Angela,
Just because they have coffee, that doesn’t justify your patronage. This is what I’m talking about. You do understand that we have coffee here? And I would even let you drink it for free if it meant you wouldn’t go support the enemy. And the only reason Kyle was there was because I asked him to go search for Butterscotch. Stealing cats is a pastime I wouldn’t put past Mark and his band of hooligans.
By supporting them, Angela, you are stealing from your own paycheck. The stronger they get, the weaker we become. Don’t you see that? I would hate to see it get worse around here and be forced to let you go just as I did the others.
Best,
Fawn, Owner
Fawn Birchill/CuriousCatBooks/8h