Anything for Her(97)

His mind did an unsettling, sideways shift. It occurred to him he’d never believed Dad really did love him the same way he loved Jed, who was his own. Maybe he’d been wrong, he thought now. Maybe being a blood relation wasn’t actually that important.

I guess I should give him a call. Just to talk. Maybe it’s even time—past time—I forgive him.

The one thing he’d never let himself think about entered his head. What if Dad had left Mom when he found out she’d had an affair, or later when he realized their oldest son wasn’t his?

I wouldn’t have had a father, that’s what.

Would that really have been better? Because the truth was, his dad had been a damn good father. The best.

Once this is settled with Allie...I’ll call him while I still can.

Feeling some sense of peace, Nolan tuned in when the referee blew the whistle and the game started, Sean playing forward.

Nolan might have been prejudiced—okay, was prejudiced—but he thought Sean was, hands down, the best player out there. He rebounded aggressively, shut down every opposing player he defended and, by the final buzzer, had scored an impressive eighteen points. Fouled once, he stepped up to the free-throw line and dropped in two shots, cool as could be.

I’ll be asking him to give up this team, these new friends. Yeah, he’d be able to play basketball wherever they went—but maybe not this season. For a kid this age, starting all over mid-school year sucked. Sean would know, because he’d done it so recently.

Nolan didn’t know what he’d do if Sean threw a fit and said, “No way am I going.”

Crap.

What if the decision came down to an either-or? Nolan asked himself. Allie or Sean? The yawning pit in his belly gave him a good idea what she’d gone through when she was seventeen and faced the same dilemma. Maybe what she faced this time, too, if she really did love him.

Allie or Sean?

Suppressing a groan, Nolan had no trouble making that decision.

He was sticking to both of them. However much Sean bitched, this choice wasn’t his to make.

That realization gave Nolan new sympathy for Allie’s mother. Parents sometimes did have to drag their reluctant kids along, the way she’d done. Hell, it happened all the time, when one parent or the other got transferred on the job, say. Of course, her decision had been different in a big way, he reminded himself; her husband had had to give up his business, Allie the chance at a brilliant future as a ballerina. And, yeah, they’d all given up their names.

He’d be asking that of Sean, too.

It’ll be tough, he told himself, but Sean will adjust. Kids did. The most important thing to a boy with Sean’s background was finding out that his new dad wouldn’t abandon him for any reason at all—and wouldn’t abandon the woman he loved, either.

Settled in his mind, Nolan watched as the jubilant home team shook hands with their opponents and then headed for the locker room. Nolan joined the exodus from the bleachers.

Sean hadn’t had much of an appetite earlier. “I guess I’m nervous,” he’d admitted. Nolan had promised pizza on the way home.

When the boys disappeared into the locker room, Nolan called the pizza parlor and ordered an extra-large, everything-on-it one to go. This was a conversation they couldn’t have in a restaurant.

In the parking lot, Nolan leaned against the fender of his truck and waited with the other parents. Sean emerged finally, showered and triumphant from the win. He and Nolan exchanged high fives.

“Man, I’m starved!” was the first thing out of his mouth.

“One step ahead of you. I called and ordered a pizza to be ready for pickup.” Nolan hesitated. “There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

Predictably, Sean badgered him, but Nolan held his ground until they got home. He waited until he’d set plates, napkins and drinks on the table while Sean opened the box and devoured his first slice of pizza in a couple of gulps.

“This is about Allie,” Nolan said, knowing the gravity of what he felt and was going to ask of the boy had to be obvious in his voice.

Sean didn’t reach for another slice. “What about Allie?”

Nolan hesitated. “You can never repeat anything I tell you. Not to anyone. Not a best friend, not a girlfriend. Not ever. You can’t hint at it on your Facebook page. This is...really important.”

The boy stared at him. “You sound like...I don’t know, like she works for the CIA or something.”