A Beautiful Forever(38)

He stands there looking between us, two women, who look nothing alike bar our height and bone structure, but both of us his family. “Perhaps we should all go and try to sort this out together,” he says quietly.

I find myself following behind them, taking a seat at the dining room table and waiting while they talk quietly to each other in the kitchen, making a tray with tea and biscuits. I’m not hungry or thirsty, but I accept it anyway.

My mother sits across from me with Daniel by her side and begins, “Paige, I want you to know that I have always loved you.”

I have to force myself not to roll my eyes as I wait for her to continue.

“I had been travelling backwards and forwards between Australia and the UK for about a year for work, and Daniel was a colleague. Every time I visited, he was so kind to me. I tried to resist my attraction because I was already married and had a son but eventually we both fell prey to temptation.” She looks at Daniel, her eyes so filled with adoration that it hurts my heart to watch them. “I was so in love with him, and he was with me too. However, I couldn’t stay with him. I had to go back and look after my family.

“When I found out I was pregnant. I knew you were Daniel's, but I hid all of my dates from your father and pretended that I fell pregnant before I’d left.

“You were premature, so they kept you in an incubator, and your father couldn’t understand what went wrong because by what I told him, you should have been full term. That coupled with your dark shock of hair made him realise that you weren’t actually his.

“We had a lot to lose by separating, so we decided to stay together and tell the world that you were his. Then another baby, your sister got added to the mix a couple of years later and things went from bad to worse.

“Your father hated that I seemed to play favourites with you and would torment me over my affair. Slowly I started to resent you, I thought that if you weren’t around – then my life would be better, so I sent you out, I drove you away.

“When your father learned what I had done he was livid with me - despite his anger over what I had done, he didn’t hate you – he just didn’t know how to love a child that wasn’t his.

“Slowly our relationship crumbled and we separated, I gave him custody of Adam and Sophie and came back here and well…” She looks at Daniel again and smiles with quivering lips. He places his arm around her, resting his hand on hers and squeezing it gently.

Tears are falling down my face as I listen. My life has just been one horrible mistake after another – the first one being hers. “Did you know about me?” I ask Daniel. “I mean, before I contacted you. Did you know about me?”

“I did,” he says. “I had to sign that I was your father for your birth certificate.”

“And you just left me there?” I stare at him, watching him as he thinks through his answer.

“I thought it was what was best. I didn’t know you were being treated poorly.”

“But you married her anyway?”

“I did. She made mistakes Paige. Lord knows I've made mistakes too in my life, but those mistakes don’t change the fact that she’s the woman I love.”

I laugh humourlessly, “You’re very passionate for an Englishman,” I say flatly.

“Well my mother, your grandmother, is Italian. She was very passionate.”

I look at my mother, “What about Adam and Sophie? You just left them too?”

She looks down at her hands and nods, “I left everyone,” she whispers.





Chapter 30


Elliot


I’m doing my best to fill in my time while I wait for a new visa to be approved. I went for my interview and produced all the necessary documents to prove my heritage, so I could apply for a five-year visa. My grandmother is English, so I could apply based on my ancestry. Now I’m in limbo while I wait. It’s already been over a month; I'm hoping it doesn’t take much longer.

Since I’ve been back, I’ve given up my flat, sold most of my furniture and moved in with my mother to help save enough money as a backup for when I go over there. She’s offered to help me out, but I want to do it on my own.

I also went and visited my father for the first time in over two years. He's married now to a girl who isn’t really that much older than me, but he seems happy. I realised when I was in the UK that I had no business being angry with him, after hearing what Paige had gone through in her life, I felt I needed to be happy my dad cared enough to try to steer me in the direction he thought was best for me.

When I told him I was going back, he also offered to help me out money wise, once again I said no. However, it’s nice to know that I can count on my parents in an emergency, nonetheless.

I got a new phone to replace the one I smashed and loaded all of my photos onto it, that way I still get to carry her around with me and see her whenever I want to.

Despite the fact she doesn’t answer, I keep calling her. If I wasn’t so damn sure about our feelings for each other, I’d feel really pathetic, but I don’t. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind – I know we belong together. So I call her and leave messages. I don’t tell her much. I just want her to know that I’m not giving up on her.

I’m back working at the same gym I was at before I left, my boss knows that I’m leaving again soon, but some of my old clients want to train with me while they can, so I’m grateful to be kept on the books.

So right now, I’m in the Botanic Gardens in Sydney, the best outdoor training spot around here, packing up the resistance bands and mats that I was using with my client, while I contemplate calling Paige again, just to hear her voicemail recording.

“Elliot?” a familiar voice says to me. I turn around to face her, amazed that this time, I’m not plagued with all the emotions I'd had last time we spoke. “How are you?” Katrina asks me smiling.

“Well thanks,” I reply, returning her smile. It’s so surreal seeing her and not having a desperate need to touch her. I still can’t stop my hand itching, but it’s because I’m wanting to call Paige.

“I heard you were back. I figured I’d run into you here eventually,” she says.

“Um yeah, I’m not back for long though,” I tell her, as I pull the zip along the bag and sit on the ground.

She sits down next to me, like we’re old friends. “Yeah, I heard. Our mothers have been gas bagging at tennis,” she says.

I shrug my shoulders, not surprised they still talk. “Well, it’s good that their still good friends… So…how’s work? How’s David?”

She leans back on her arms and stretches her long legs out in front of her, crossing them at the ankles.

“Good and good, what about you?”

“Well, works fine, but I haven’t seen David for years,” I joke.

“Har har, very funny,” she says. “I um… heard about the girl in London and was kind of talking about her.”

I think of Paige and give a wry smile, wishing she wasn’t so far away right now, wishing she had just told me about her past early on, so we could have talked properly instead of leaving it the way we did. I open the gallery on my phone, selecting a picture of Paige and me when we went away together the weekend before I left.

I hand her my phone to show her the image. “Her name is Paige. I’m just waiting on my Visa, so I can go back to her.”

Katrina studies the picture. “She’s beautiful Elliot,” she says as she swipes at the screen to move on to the next photo. I don’t want her going through my pictures and reach over, taking it from her hands as she says, “Wow! Is that a tattoo?”

All of a sudden, I bristle as my defences fly up, and I switch of my phone, tucking it away. I know how some people look upon tattoos, especially massive ones like Paige's, and I don’t want anyone judging her when her tattoo represents so much for her.

Noticing a change in my demeanour Katrina shifts positions. “I’m sorry Elliot. I shouldn’t have done that. The tattoo, well what I saw of it, is pretty amazing – it must have hurt.”

“Probably,” I say quickly, looking up in the sky as I hear a bird call.

Appearing a little awkward, Katrina stands up and brushes the grass off her running pants. “I guess, I’d better leave you to it then.”

Nodding, I watch her take a couple of steps away. I feel bad for making her feel like she has to leave, “Katrina – ” I start.

She pauses her retreat, “Yes?”

“I don’t know if I’m coming back, so in case I never see you again – have a great wedding, tell David I said ‘hi’ and have a fantastic life; I mean that.”

“I know you do Elliot, thank you, and I truly hope everything works out with Paige.”

“It will Katrina. It has to.”