A Beautiful Forever(34)

“Why do you think I would?” I ask, focusing my eyes ahead so she can’t see my face.

“I just have this terrible feeling Paige. You’re not being honest with him, or yourself. He’s baring his soul to you, and you’re still holding back on him. Just be good to him ok? You could ruin him forever if you’re not careful with him. I’ve seen it happen too many times to count Paige.”

“Where? In your books?” I question her, not appreciating her reading me so well, it’s like she’s figured out exactly what I’m thinking.

“Paige, I’m not just a bookworm. I do have a life you know,” she tells me, looking slightly wounded from my words.

“I’m sorry Nomes, I shouldn’t have snapped,” I tell her, feeling immediately guilty.

A single tear slides from my eye and I wipe it away secretly as I pretend to brush back my hair. I think of the beauty that’s inside Elliot’s heart, and I’m riddled with guilt at the thought of being the one to rob him of that. What if I do ruin him forever? What if he never finds love again just because I was the one who was too selfish to say no to him. I never should have let this happen, I should have been strong enough to stay away from the beginning. I'm a horrible person.





Elliot


“Agy!” I call out, embracing her where I find her in the reception area.

“Elliot, I’m so sad today. Why do you have to leave me? Who am I going to ogle now?” she jokes, hugging me back.

“You’ll find someone; I'm sure,” I laugh offering my arm and leading her into the gym.

“What would you like to do for our last session?” I ask.

“Fancy taking an old lady out for a coffee?” she asks hopefully.

“Sure, let me go and grab my wallet, and you’re so far from being old Agy – don’t put yourself down.” I jog into the staff room and grab my wallet from my locker, leading Agy out and letting Celsey now that I’m leaving the gym for an hour in case anyone is looking for me.

“I like that little American girl,” Agy says to me as leave the reception area and head outside. “She’s always so friendly.”

“I like her too, although she’s going home soon as well,” I inform her.

“Oh, all the good ones are going. I'll be left with boring English people again!” she moans, although I know she’s joking.

I take her into the first coffee shop we come to and spend the best part of an hour having my final chat with my favourite client.





Chapter 26


Paige


It’s Thursday night and Elliot's, and my going-away bash is tonight. His flight leaves tomorrow at 2pm and he’s expecting me to be on it too. I’ve gone through all the motions. I ordered my ticket. I've packed my bags, and I’ve quit my job. I figured that we could have a few more days of happiness before I told him I wasn’t going, but know it’s the night before he leaves and times running out – I don’t think I can bring myself to do it.

I know; I'm a horrible person. It's so selfish of me, and I feel awful, but I can’t stand to miss out on one happy moment with him, not when there are so few left.

“You ready, gorgeous?” he asks me from the door of our room.

“Ready,” I reply, collecting my purse and moving close to him so I can kiss him. I’m counting them down. I only have a handful left.

I look at all the faces of our flatmates gathered in the living area waiting for us. I don’t feel like I have really spent that much time with them as I’ve been firmly attached to Elliot’s side from the moment I arrived. Only Naomi and Brian remain from the original group I moved in with, so I kind of feel like we are going through the motions of a going-away party. There is a new guy staying at the flat now called Adam, he replaced Gavin when he left, this is the first time he's coming out with all of us. He and Jolene seem fairly interested in each other, so perhaps they’ll take our room when we leave. Who knows?





Elliot


When we arrive at the restaurant, there are a couple of the other trainers I know from work already waiting as well as Paige’s boss Andrea, we’ve hired a function room for the evening, so we can all sit, eat, chat and linger for as long as we do or don’t want to.

I’m worried about Paige; she's acting a little strange tonight, she’s smiling and saying all the right things but there’s something about her that isn’t quite right, I’m putting it down to nerves about going back to Australia, but I’m not entirely sure it isn’t something else.

“You’re not drinking!” Brian admonishes Paige as he places a new round of drinks on the table. “Come on Paige, it’s a celebration. You're letting down the team!”

Laughing Paige picks up her drink and takes a small sip, for Brian’s benefit, although I notice the level of her drink doesn’t alter much at all.

“Good girl!” Brian calls out, much louder than he needed to. He already seems half cut, and it’s only nine o’clock.

“Do you want me to drink that for you?” I ask Paige quietly as I lean towards her ear.

“You might have to. They keep appearing in front of me,” she smiles, handing me her drink on the sly and replacing her glass with my empty.

I lose count of how many I have. Everyone wants to buy us both a drink to say good bye, so they just keep coming. Drinking for two was a bad idea because now, I’m completely off my face, leaning all over Paige as she laughs at me while we say good-bye to our guests.

“Are you going to be alright? I can drive you if you like,” Celsey offers as the group waves us off.

“No, no, it’s fine – you go and have fun with everyone else. I’ll get this guy home. The fresh air and the walk will do him good,” I hear Paige say, although it’s all starting to sound very far away to me.

“Alright then, well safe trip home you two, and it was nice to meet you Paige,” Celsey says.

“You too,” Paige smiles.

“good-bye my loves! I’ll miss you so much!” a drunken Naomi yells leaning all over both of us and causing us to stumble.

“You’ll probably see us in the morning Naomi. The plane isn’t until the afternoon,” Paige laughs, trying to keep us all upright.

“Everybody! We’re leaving, thank you so much for coming. We’re both really thankful for such a great send off, and we’ll miss you all,” I call out, slurring slightly but still not drunk enough to forget my manners. My mother really did teach me well.

We burst out of the door to the restaurant as a noisy group, still calling out our good-byes as Paige steadies me on the short walk back to the flat.

“You didn’t have to drink all of my drinks you know,” Paige laughs again. She’s really happy now, maybe I was wrong before and there’s nothing going on with her.

“I told you, I’ll do anything for you Paige – even get rolling drunk so people don’t sulk when you won’t drink with them,” I slur as we make it to the front door of our building, and I force my feet to climb the stairs.





Paige


God, he’s so heavy. I feel like I’m getting drunk just from the fumes coming off him. I somehow get him over to the bed and start to drag his shoes off. He sits up as I’m trying to take his belt off, and pulls me towards him, kissing me passionately in a clumsy drunken way, his mouth tastes sweet from all the bourbon he’s been plied with tonight.

Breaking away, I lean up on his chest and look down at him, trying to keep my hair out of his face. He lifts his hands and starts to clumsily twirl my curls around his fingers, pulling at it so it hurts a little.

“You are so drunk,” I point out laughing.

His words come out all slurred as he speaks, “I love you so f*cking much Paige,” he says with as much feeling as he can muster.

My heart jumps a little from his drunken outburst, he hasn’t said it again since he yelled it at me last weekend. “I know you do Elliot.”

He shakes his head vigorously, “Noooo, you don’t know, I haven’t said it properly,” he grabs my face with both his hands and looks me dead in the eye, suddenly sounding very sober. “I love you Paige Larsen. I think I have I loved you since before I even met you.”

I smile down at him, tears emerging from my eyes because I know it’s time to end this.

“Are you crying? No, don’t cry, you’re always so sad. But whenever you smile, I feel like I won something amazing,” he breathes, using his hands to emphasise the last word.

“Elliot, you are so smashed right now. You need to sleep,” I tell him through my tears, smiling at his openness and doubting that he’ll even remember this conversation in the morning.

“Alright,” he says, closing his eyes. “But you have to stay right next to me.”