The Dilemma(28)

I remembered looking at Marnie on her seventeenth birthday, the age I’d been when I became pregnant, and thinking How could they? How could my parents have disowned me? I also remember thinking that Marnie could do anything, anything, and I’d forgive her.

Now, I wonder if Fate decided I was tempting it, and chose to put me to the test.





3 P.M. – 4 P.M.





Adam


My stomach clenches as I pace the floor in Marnie’s room. I need – really need – Marnie to phone before Liv gets home. If she doesn’t, and I tell Liv about the crash, she won’t believe that Marnie is safe even if I show her that Marnie couldn’t have made the Cairo flight, not with only ten minutes to spare. Nothing will stop the panic she’ll feel from spiralling out of control.

I need someone to talk to, not to tell them anything, but to fill this building void while I wait. Nelson, I’ll phone Nelson.

I sit down on the bed, about to call him, when I remember he has the kids. I think about going to find Josh, offer to help him in the garden, do something physical. That would take my mind off things. But he’s with Max and they’ll be joking and messing around as they get everything ready for tonight.

The person I really want to talk to, I realise, is Dad. I find his number and press call.

‘Hi Adam, what’s up?’ The familiar sound of his voice makes my throat tighten. ‘Adam? Adam, are you there?’

I get to my feet. ‘Yes, sorry Dad, Josh was asking me something.’

‘Do you want to call back?’

I realise too late I shouldn’t have called him. He’s always had this amazing sixth sense which picks up when I’m worried about something.

‘No, it’s fine,’ I manage.

‘So, how’s Livia feeling?’

I walk to the window and press my forehead against the glass. ‘Happy, excited. She’s out with Kirin and Jess, at a spa.’

‘Not running around like a headless chicken, then?’

‘No, it’s unbelievable how organised she is.’

‘What about you?’

‘Me?’

‘Yes. How are you?’

I straighten myself up. ‘Fine.’

‘Is it Marnie?’

Christ. ‘Sorry?’

‘Marnie. Is that why you’re feeling a bit low? Because she’s not going to be at the party?’

‘I’m not—’ I stop. ‘I wish she was here, that’s all.’

‘We all do. Have you heard from her?’

‘Yes, yesterday. She was busy revising. How are you and Mum?’

‘Looking forward to seeing everyone tonight.’ He pauses. ‘Are you sure everything’s alright?’

‘Yes, positive. I thought I’d give you a call, that’s all.’

‘Do you want to speak to Mum?’

‘No, it’s alright, tell her I’ll see her later. I’ll let you go now.’

‘Whatever it is that’s worrying you, it’ll all work out in the end,’ he says.

It almost bursts out of me, I almost ask him if he’s heard about the plane that crashed. But I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from telling him about Marnie, and I need to tell Livia before I tell anyone else.

‘I should go, Dad,’ I say and before he can reply, I cut the call.

I can’t stand the silence. I leave Marnie’s room and go downstairs. In the utility room, the washing machine has finished its cycle. I take out Marnie’s dressing gown and place it in the tumble dryer so that it’s ready for when she gets back.





Livia


I lie my head against the car seat and close my eyes. We’ve just dropped Jess off, so I’m back in the front.

‘Don’t fight it,’ Kirin says, throwing me an amused grin.

‘Sorry,’ I groan, forcing my mouth closed after giving the biggest yawn of my life. ‘It was the massage. I feel so relaxed and sleepy now.’

‘Nothing to do with that extra glass of champagne then?’ she says, laughing. ‘You may as well rest, it’s going to take us a while to get back.’ She peers through the windscreen. ‘Where has all this traffic come from?’

‘Saturday shoppers,’ I say. ‘As long as you get me back in time for the party, it’s fine.’

‘How do you think Jess looked?’ I hear the worry in her voice and wish I could tell her that I thought Jess looked great.

‘I’ve seen her looking better,’ I say sadly. ‘She was a bit unsteady on her feet, even with her stick.’

‘I’m really worried about her. Nelson is too.’ She pauses. ‘Actually, he’s more concerned about Rob. He told him that we thought the MS was beginning to take its toll on Jess but Rob seems to be in denial. He doesn’t think she’s gone downhill at all; he insists that she’s still very independent. But Jess told me herself that she’s having difficulty getting up the stairs and that sometimes her hands go numb. Nelson’s worried that Rob isn’t going to be able to cope if Jess’s symptoms become worse. She’ll always have me and Nelson to help her, of course, but once the babies arrive, I’m not sure how much time I’ll actually have.’