Smolder (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #29)(64)

I wondered if Jean-Claude’s skin had tanned when he was alive, or if all this white skin had burned like mine?

There was a knock on the office door, and we all tensed. Ethan said, “I’m sorry to interrupt, really sorry, but the audience is still waiting for you. Nathaniel is onstage trying to keep them occupied so they don’t start to leave, but we need you.”

I lay there in our cuddly nest of spoons and said, “Am I the only one that completely forgot about the audience, or should I feel stupid all on my own?”

Jean-Claude nuzzled my hair and held me tighter, pressing his nakedness against mine. It wasn’t so much sexual now as comforting. “It is not stupid to fully enjoy the pleasures that you love, ma petite.”

“Maybe not stupid, but you didn’t forget them.”

Richard’s arm tightened around us both like he was hugging us. “I came in the back through the alley, so I didn’t even see the audience. I just felt Jean-Claude call to the wolves for help, and I was close enough to answer the call.”

“It is lucky indeed that you were close at hand, mon lupe. I do not think any other wolf could have substituted for you this night.”

“Wait, did you say you were on a date and that’s why you were so close?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“Is she here? Please tell me your date wasn’t standing outside the door while we had sex.” I started to try to sit up enough to look at him, but both men held me in place.

“She isn’t here. I called her an Uber and sent her home.”

I tried not to struggle with their combined strength keeping me pressed in place, but suddenly being the little spoon wasn’t as cozy. Richard had dumped his date to come have sex with us; it just seemed rude.

“I hope she forgives you,” I said.

“It was a first date, and I was bored out of mind. I’m sorry that people are in danger, but I’m not sorry that I’m here with the two of you instead of with a stranger droning on about her divorce and how I was nothing like her ex-husband and wasn’t that good.”

“That sounds awful,” I said.

Jean-Claude stroked his arm and said, “Why would you be on such a date?”

“Fixed up by another teacher, and my therapist has been encouraging me to date more.”

“What’s your therapist going to say about being here with us?”

“Nothing, she told me to either date and find someone to make me stop mooning over you and Jean-Claude or to get back with you.”

I was glad that Jean-Claude was in between us because I went very still. The sex was fabulous, and we needed to repair the triumvirate to secure Jean-Claude’s power base, but we weren’t back together. We were not suddenly a threesome. Richard had alienated so many people in our poly group that they’d never have sex with him, and he couldn’t seduce them into thinking it was a good idea. I didn’t even think it was a good idea and I had the benefit of seeing him naked. Did Richard really believe that one good fuck and all was forgiven, or had I misunderstood? Please let me have misunderstood.

“I know that this doesn’t make everything all right between us. I’m not expecting one good fuck, and everything is forgiven.”

“Thank you for saying that out loud,” I said.

He hugged us both again and then his arm moved, and I looked back over my shoulder. I caught a glimpse of his hair and upper body, so I rolled over still in Jean-Claude’s arms so I could see both of their faces.

He idly stroked Jean-Claude’s arm as he spoke. “I don’t know how comfortable I’ll be with certain things, but I finally changed therapists a few months ago, because the first one was an older man and he was more homophobic than I was, and one of my major issues was that I was totally captivated by this beautiful man that I kept trying to hate, because I didn’t want to be bisexual on top of being a werewolf. It’s one of the reasons I freaked out after we were together with Asher in the bedroom that first time. It felt great and then I went home and tried to be what I thought I was supposed to be instead of what I was.”

We both just stared at him. “Wait, go back, did you just say you were bisexual?”

He nodded.

“Richard,” Jean-Claude said, “I am astonished. I . . . you have rendered me speechless.”

“Am I too late? Is there no room for me in the poly group? I’ve been horrible and I’ve vanished for months on all of you, so if it’s too late then I understand. It’s my own fault.”

“It is never too late while life remains,” Jean-Claude said. “Only true death takes away our second chances.”

“I agree,” I said, “but we have to talk to the rest of our people. Some of the newer ones haven’t even met you or only in passing.”

“I know, and I’m sorry that it took me this long to admit the truth to myself.”

Jean-Claude rolled over on his back to look up at Richard, and for some reason that made me go up on one elbow so that I was mirroring Richard’s pose. He got totally distracted by my breasts for a second and couldn’t make eye contact with either of us.

“If that look on your face is you trying not to stare at my breasts, it’s okay to stare. We just had sex, so you’re allowed,” I said.

Richard smiled and looked embarrassed. “Not all women feel that way, even after sex.”