How to Be a Bawse: A Guide to Conquering Life(25)

Humble chuckled and didn’t say much, but I could read his mind. It would be next to impossible to get permission to shoot on that court, especially with such short notice and without a hefty check. I didn’t want to give up so quickly, and so I made it my personal mission to at least TRY to make it happen. I contacted every person I knew—ticket sellers, social media strategists, even YouTube. (YouTube is like my third parent. If I don’t know how to do something, I bug them and hope they can hold my hand and teach me.)

“DON’T GIVE UP BEFORE YOU EVEN TRY.

It turned out that YouTube has a relationship with the NBA, and my contact was able to connect me with someone from the Raptors team. Do you hear that? It’s the sound of my determined foot slowly prying open a door. I put in my request: We wanted to shoot our music video on the Raptors court. We needed four hours. (I knew two would be more than enough.) We would have fifteen people with us (really, we only needed ten). We were going to use a drone (this part was true). The paperwork was submitted, and then the waiting game began. The response was that we would have to purchase various types of insurance to shoot inside the stadium—everything from insurance for ourselves to insurance for the drone. Well, ACC, I see your hand and I counter with “I think we only need this one insurance.” Back and forth we went. Slowly I was able to get my foot in the door, until finally, two days later, we’d gotten the approval and were standing outside the ACC. We walked into the arena, set up our equipment at lightning speed, and shot the video in two hours, with ten people, using one drone.





A Bawse does not let anything stop them from aiming high. I ask crazy things of my team all the time and I won’t accept anyone telling me something is “unrealistic.” Don’t give up before you even try. I refuse to believe something can’t happen until I’m flat-out told NO. To be honest, sometimes even after hearing NO I still don’t believe it can’t be done. Why? Because I’m relentlessly determined. And you know what? It’s worked out great for me so far. It’s fine to push for what you want, as long as you’re charming and polite about it.

If you aim low, you’ll end up lower than you intended. That’s why you have to aim high. No one else is going to compensate for your lack of ambition. I had the opportunity to shoot a collaboration video with First Lady Michelle Obama about the importance of education around the world. We both lead campaigns promoting education, and so doing a video together made perfect sense. When I confirmed the shoot, I was told I would have fifteen minutes with her. I asked for thirty. I got twenty. I wanted to play a game with her that lasted three rounds, and so I asked for five. I got three. I wanted to become the next president of the United States, and I said so. Everyone laughed. Apparently Canadians can’t do that. Whatever. The point is, don’t be afraid to ask for things. The worst that will happen is that you’ll be told no. Just remember to smile, stand tall, and look as adorable as possible.

Now, I’d like you to give this book ten stars online. Ten complete stars, please.

What’s that? You think it deserves only seven? Fine. What about eight?

You know what? Let’s agree on five. Five stars will do.

Thanks!

smiles charmingly





IF YOU’RE A PARENT, you’re likely going to hate this chapter. The next few pages go against a lot of the lessons I was taught while growing up, especially those that were drilled into me by my mom and dad. A lot of parents, especially South Asian parents (I say this from experience), are firm believers in having several backup plans when it comes to life. With respect to your career, finances, and even relationships (welp!), they stress how important it is to have a Plan A, Plan B, and Plan C. Hell, some parents even make it to a Plan E. Yes, that’s right. A plane (Ba-Doom-Tish! I’m here all night, folks!).

The idea of a backup plan is ingrained in our minds. If I’m traveling for an event, I pack the outfit I’m going to wear complete with jewelry and shoes. Done. But then, what if for some unforeseen reason that outfit doesn’t make sense anymore once I arrive? What if I spontaneously gain fifteen pounds on the plane ride because of turbulence or something? I better pack a backup outfit with another pair of shoes and some different jewelry. But then, neither of my outfits accounts for the weather being terrible. What if this one time Miami experiences a blizzard? I better pack a third outfit option that can withstand cold temperatures. Okay, done …

… although I never took into account the possibility of meeting someone cute and being asked on a date. I better pack one nice outfit (and a razor) just to be safe. By the time I leave, I have my clothes in a U-Haul and I’m headed to the airport.

Backup plans for days! It’s ironic that I’m constantly creating backups but still have yet to set up iCloud (I just don’t get it, okay!). Oh well, that’s not the point. The point is that regardless of how conditioned we are to create backup plans, I’m going to encourage you to focus only on Plan A. In other words, eff a Plan B.

When I made the decision to pursue YouTube full-time, I was in the middle of applying for graduate school. My parents were very keen on me getting my master’s degree because they believed it would be something great to fall back on (you know, like a backup plan). So there I was, writing an essay for my application form, attempting to get into the counseling psychology program. Halfway through the essay I stopped and stared at the screen. I literally felt like I was Harry Potter and Dementors were eating away at my soul. And not even normal Dementors. They were Dementors that were on a no-carb diet or a juice cleanse or something and today was their cheat day. Basically, Dementors from Los Angeles.