Don’t Let Me Go(93)

“It doesn’t scan, though,” Billy said.

“What’s scan?”

“Nothing. Sorry. I shouldn’t criticize. It’s a great cheer. Very good attitude.”

“No, really. Tell me what scan is.”

“When it works out right rhythm-wise.”

“Oh. Right. That. Like a real poem. I could fix it with more yeas. Yea, yea, yea, yea, Grace dint get taken away today. I have to sort of say ‘dint’ instead of didn’t. But then it works pretty good. Billy. Teach me another kind of dancing, OK?”

“What kind?”

“I don’t know. Anything. I just want to dance, and I’m getting over-rehearsed on my tap dance for school, you said so yourself. So let’s do something different.”

So Billy, because of his being Billy and all, taught her a waltz.

You did it to the count of three, facing each other and holding hands, which was kind of nice because it was something they could do together. And then, after a few steps, he taught her how to step back and twirl. He held one of her hands above her head and she twirled. And then she made Billy step back and twirl, even though that’s the girl’s part, and even though Grace had to reach up high and he had to duck down low. It made them both laugh.

So that was a good day.





Billy



It was twenty-three days later. Twenty-three once-daily “Grace dint get taken away today” cheers later. Exactly. Billy had been counting.

Someone signal-knocked at his door in the middle of the day. Grace should have been at school, Rayleen should have been at work, and nobody else even knew about the signal-knock. Billy hurried to the door and opened it.

It was Rayleen.

“Hey,” he said. “What are you doing home in the middle of the day?”

“It’s Jesse’s mother,” she said. “She took a bad turn. They took her from the nursing home to the hospital. It looks like it won’t be long now. Can I come in? I need to talk to you. It’s important.”

He stood back from the doorway, and she came in.

“Coffee?”

“No. Thanks. I have to talk fast so my throat won’t close up. I stayed way too long last time. Took me days to get over it. So, really quick. Jesse wants me to be with him. You know. When his mother’s dying. So I’m going.”

“Oh. Good. So you want to know if Grace can be here tonight?”

“Maybe not just tonight. I have no idea how long it’ll be. Could be days.”

It struck Billy hard that Jesse was away. He wouldn’t walk with them to school in the morning. The best part of Billy’s day. How would he feel when Jesse left permanently? He put the thought away again, knowing he couldn’t take it on just then.

“It’s fine. She can be here as long as she needs to be. But. Oh. You’ll be gone, too. For days. So…how’s she going to get to school in the morning?”

“Right. That’s what I need to talk about. I was hoping…you.”

“Me?”

“I was hoping.”

“Just me? Alone?” His voice rose alarmingly.

“Well. You and Grace.”

“Not on the way home it wouldn’t be.”

Billy felt panic rising up through his words, feeding on itself.

“But you’re doing so much better. You’ve been walking with us every morning. It must be starting to feel a little more natural by now.”

“Oh, yes,” Billy said. “Very. It feels very natural. Probably because I never have to do it all alone any more.”

“OK. Look. Bottom line, I think I need to go with Jesse. But I know this is asking a lot of you. I knew it would be. So I already called Felipe. He says he’ll do it if there’s really no other way. But he doesn’t get off work until after one in the morning. So it’s really going to cut into his sleep. But if the two of you could work it out…Maybe he could go with you tomorrow, and the day after you could try it by yourself?”

Billy forced himself to take a deep breath.

“I don’t know,” he said, “but we’ll work it out somehow. You just go. We’ll work it out.”

Rayleen stepped in and threw her arms around him. Billy felt the warmth of her lips on his cheek. It didn’t move off a second later, either. The lips remained pressed to his face for what felt like an extended time. And much later, even after she’d hurried out the door, the warmth was still there to be felt.

? ? ?

“Here, take this up to Felipe,” Billy said to Grace. “He’ll need it.”

Grace took the mug from his hands, holding it carefully in both of hers.

“Poor Felipe. He doesn’t get to bed until after two. No cream? Why didn’t you put cream in it?”

“Because Felipe doesn’t take cream. He takes it black.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

“Wait,” she said, paused in his doorway. “When did you ever have coffee with Felipe?”

“One day while you were at school. Run get him now, OK? We have to go.”

Truthfully, Billy realized, they were right on time and there was no need to hurry. It was only his stress that drove the moment.

A few minutes later she led Felipe down the stairs, both hands on his elbow. Felipe was holding the mug of coffee with one hand and rubbing both eyes with the other, feeling his way down the steps without looking.