Don't Let Me Fall(25)

Keller and I had one more awesome night. I don’t have a lot of free time because of work and school so it was quick but it was just like the other two times. f-ucking amazing. I

don’t know if he thinks it’s weird that I don’t know his name or what but he doesn’t say anything about it. I guess when it’s just sex, no one really cares about that kind of

thing.

In the back of my mind I know I should know his name. People know we had and are having sex. They just look at us and they see the sex radiating off our bodies as we pass each other

in the dining halls or around campus. Aimee thinks I’m idiot for still sleeping with him and not getting with Darren from class because he’s nice but come on? I know Darren’s

name.

I know you won’t get it now but I have a reason for that. Trust me, stick it out and you’ll see.

It’s the beginning of October and it’s Kelsey’s first day back to school. I skipped my first class (I already did the volunteer work so Red is happy with me) and went with Dad to

drop her and Matty off. I can’t believe it’s Matty’s last year of high school. He’s my younger brother but he’s growing up so fast. And then there’s Kelsey. She’s fourteen.

Fourteen! She’s a freshman in high school and I can’t believe it. She’ll be fifteen in April and that means it’ll be a year that she was diagnosed with leukemia.

I’m trying to be hopeful and seeing the future. Kelsey will get better and the cancer won’t come back. She’ll live a long healthy life, get married, have kids and be a

grandmother. She’ll be okay.

It’s all I want to know. That she’ll be okay.

“You okay?” Logan asked sliding into the elevator I just got into before the doors closed. Dammit. I’ve been trying to avoid him for awhile now. It’s like everywhere I go, he’s

there. And he’s always trying to analyze me. It’s annoying as f-uck.

“I’m fine,” I said staring at the floor.

“Are you hungry?”

“I’m meeting Aimee downstairs.”

Aimee and I went up to her room for a bit then she decided to throw out the trash but she never came back. She texted me to meet her downstairs in the dining hall. She even told me

not to get excited because Keller isn’t down there. Like I give a shit. Honestly, I don’t. If I’m horny and he’s around then I’ll care.

I told her about the whole name thing so she calls him Keller. She knows his real name but since she knows I don’t want to know it, she calls him Keller.

“She can wait,” Logan said pressing the tenth floor button. We’re currently passing the eleventh so the elevator came to a stop and the doors opened. “Come on,” Logan said

grabbing my hand and dragging me out.

“I don’t have a lot of time,” I said. “I need to eat and then go to work.” He came to a stop in front of the elevators and pressed the up button. Uh... I don’t know what he’s

thinking but his room is upstairs...and Aimee hasn’t stopped trying to get us together. “Um, Logan, I’m really hungry.” Which isn’t a lie. I barely ate anything today.

“It’s just five minutes,” he said pressing the button even more.

You can get a lot done in five minutes, I wanted to say.

An elevator opened and we walked in. That’s when I noticed he’s still holding my hand. I looked down and stared at his fingers covering mine. My sweater’s arms aren’t that loose

so if his fingers ride up a bit, he’ll feel my scar. Shit.

I slipped my hand out of his and crossed my arms over my chest as I waited to be taken to the twenty-second floor. When the elevator doors opened, Logan walked out and as much as I

wanted to stay behind and be brought back downstairs to the ground floor, I walked out. His room is on the twentieth floor. We’re not doing anything then.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“It’s a surprise,” Logan said walking toward a door.

My eyes widened when I saw it was the door leading to the roof. It’s locked at all times (that’s what I hear) but Logan turned the knob and there it went.

I somehow managed to follow him outside and here I am...standing on the roof, looking out at Boston.

I can f-ucking laugh at the irony of this.

Who brings a suicidal person onto a roof?

“I still don’t know what we’re doing up here,” I said, confused.

“Close your eyes,” Logan said softly.

I just stared at him. I am not falling for that. He can push me over, leave me out here and make me do it myself or worse...he might kiss me again. He hasn’t done it since I kneed

him in the balls but that doesn’t mean he won’t do it again.

“Trust me,” he said stepping behind me. He placed his hands on my shoulders and started walking me toward the edge. “Close your eyes.”

“Don’t push me,” I whispered.

“I won’t. I promise.”

My breath caught in my throat when I looked down and saw how high we are. Shit. This is f-ucking scary. I don’t want to keep looking down. I want to turn around and leave. I want

to go–

Logan squeezed my shoulders a bit and I shivered.