Big Chicas Don't Cry(92)

Sure, it was beautiful with lots of restaurants and cool places to visit. But that didn’t matter. Because I didn’t want the job.

Nope, I didn’t want it. Because if I did want it, then I’d be crushed when I didn’t get it.

I had applied on a lark. It was one of those days at the News-Press when I was mad at Adrian for no particular reason.

Well, I guess there was one huge reason. I was mad because he’d made me fall in love with him, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. That translated into a low threshold of annoyance when he was around. And if I was mad at him, then I couldn’t be sad about him.

That day I applied had been one of the worst between us. We were supposed to go out with Deanna and Mark to the movies, but Isela had called and invited him to dinner with her parents and his parents. The thing with his dad had gotten better, and I knew he was trying to make the effort to see them more.

I’d told him I was fine if he wanted to cancel. But he didn’t believe me and pulled me into the conference room.

“I know you’re mad, and you’re going to be mad all day if you don’t get it out.”

It made me even angrier that he was right.

“Yes, I’m pissed. What else is new? But you don’t get to make me the witch that tells you to not go see your parents. And, honestly, the more we keep talking about this, the less I care. You don’t owe me any explanation of what you do or where you go. Happy now?”

I stormed out, grabbed my purse, and headed for the elevator.

I heard him call my name as I got inside. The elevator started to close until Adrian stuck his foot between the doors, and they opened back up. He got inside with me and hit the button for the parking garage.

“What’s wrong with you?” he shouted. “We were in the middle of a conversation. Why did you leave like that?”

“Because I told you I don’t care anymore,” I said. Too bad it couldn’t have been the truth. The P button lit up, and the doors opened.

I started walking to my car, and he followed me. His legs were longer than mine, so he was able to pass me, and then he blocked my path. “Then why are you acting like I killed your dog?”

I couldn’t answer him. Not without revealing the truth. The truth was I was in love with him. Desperately in love. But he was my boss and didn’t feel the same way.

Maybe no pets had been harmed. Still didn’t mean that I didn’t get to be angry about it.

So I mustered every ounce of pride I could and looked him in the eye and lied my ass off. “I’m not. Everything is fine.”

He put his hands in his pocket and said, “If you say so.”

It wasn’t until the elevators closed and I could trust he was well on his way back up to the newsroom that I allowed my knees to give from the weight of everything I’d been trying to keep inside.

The one thing that I refused to do, however, was think about how I was going to walk into that newsroom every day and pretend that my heart hadn’t been broken in ways it had never been before.

And that’s how I’d ended up in the lobby of Above the Fold.

It was a new online startup that had only been in business a few months. According to the company’s website—which I’d read over and over again since scheduling the interview—the plan was to open up at least ten editions in the next year focusing on major regions or metropolitan areas. The editions would cover news, sports, and entertainment just like a print newspaper, except these articles would live only online.

They had already broken some of the biggest stories in the news. They were the next big thing in the publishing world, and it would be exciting to be a part of it.

Fuck. I so wanted this job.

“Erica, Natalie is ready to see you now.”

The receptionist led me to a conference room at the end of a long hallway. The attractive woman seated at the table was the magazine’s managing editor, Natalie Dagmire.

“So, Erica, why are you thinking about leaving the News-Press?” Natalie asked after we’d sat down.

Because I’m in love with my city editor, and now it’s uncomfortable to be around him.

“Well, I’ve always been interested in the human side of the news. Frankly, after two years of covering education, it’s starting to take its toll. I want—no, I need—to tell different kinds of stories.” It was the honest truth. Sure, Adrian was one reason why it was time for me to move on. But it wasn’t the only one.

The interview lasted forty-five minutes. At the end, we were chatting and laughing as if we’d known each other forever.

“Well, I think you have some great experience and would really fit in well with our company,” Natalie said. “Let’s have you come back for a writing test and then another round of interviews with our regional and assignment editors next week.”

“Sounds great,” I said and stood up. “Thank you so much.”

As I walked out of the office and toward my car, I tried not to think about Adrian.

Which is probably why he decided to call me at that very second.

We hadn’t spoken since the day we’d argued. We’d exchanged a few texts about work, but that was about it. I figured he was calling now because we were going to work together tomorrow, and he didn’t want me to be mad.

“Where are you?” he asked after I answered.