What Doesn't Destroy Us (The Devil's Dust #1)(35)

Bobby slid his hands up a girl's torso as she walked by. “Besides, if Dani doesn’t stomp all over you, Bull’s boot will.” I grunted at his assumptions. “I’m only telling you this because I can see you opening yourself up to this broad, and I’m telling you it won’t work out.”

I heard what he was saying and he was right. Dani did have issues with her parents, so she fit the bill and every time I went near her she would become reserved. I hate how I have her in my f*cking mind all the time. If she is the kind of girl Bobby thinks she is, then she's going to chew me up, spit on me, and rub it in with her stiletto. Just the thought makes my chest ache; feel hollow. I feel like such a *.

When we got back to the club, Bobby ended up calling Candy; wouldn’t be the first time we screwed Candy together. Bitch took whatever we would give her; most girls did, in hopes of being patched in as a brother's property. We usually called a couple of girls when we got back from a run to relieve stress. But I didn’t want to see Candy this time and that pissed me off. I knew exactly why I didn’t want to see Candy. I f*ck anyone I want with no remorse, yet just the thought of anyone besides Dani had me second guessing myself. As Candy was sprawled out on that damn couch half naked, my mind kept going back and forth if I should go see what Dani was doing, or if she was awake, and did she want to see me? The smell of her, the feel of her warm body against mine, her long beautiful hair, and those f*cking eyes. Bobby offered me coke, and I wanted to relax my mind. It wasn’t anything more to me than coke on a slutty tit.

Dani’s reaction was a surprise, and that’s putting it f*cking lightly. She didn’t fall to the ground and cry, or let Candy walk all over her. Her reaction proved she is where she was born to be, and if I was just something to prove to mommy and daddy, she wouldn’t have gotten so upset with me fooling around with Candy. Bobby was wrong about her, she was not that high maintenance, stuck up bitch he pegged her to be; that I pegged her to be. Seeing her beat Candy’s ass like the club brat she is was also the most becoming thing I have ever seen, and it left my dick rock hard. I’m tired of playing these games with her. It’s time to find out where the f*ck this is going; whatever the f*ck this is.

I shut and lock the door. Dani turns, impaling me with those emerald green eyes of hers. She is wearing the Devil's Dust shirt again, well, what’s left of it. She’s a f*cking vixen in that shirt. A couple of scratches feather across her left cheek, no doubt from Candy’s fake nails. I can hear music playing from her headphones on the bed. She walks over to it and stops the music. I notice her knuckles are bruised and bloody; I’m not sure if it’s her blood or Candy’s. I would inspect further, but I’m not looking for an ass kicking myself. I’m sure I’m the last person in the world she wants to touch her. Candy made me out to be in it for nothing but sex when it came to women, and it usually is, but with Dani it’s different. I can’t get her off my mind, and I feel for her on a different level than I have for any female.

“Dani, look, the other night… tonight, I just...“ I can’t spit the f*cking words out, I have never had to explain my actions before, especially to a woman. It really isn’t easy with Dani just standing there with a vicious glare.

“You don’t have to explain yourself, Shadow. It was just sex, no labels, right?” She's trying to sound stern and sure of herself, but I can see through her; she wants more from us than sex.

“I think we were both okay that night with just sex,” I run my hands through my hair; this always seems to catch her attention, “but, I can’t get you out of my f*cking head.” I point to my head in explanation. “I don’t know what this is; if this is even anything to put a label on, but I would be willing to put my life on the line to find out where it goes.”

I shock myself in my admission, but it’s the truth. I have never been this twisted over a female before, and I would be a f*cking fool to turn away from it. Most girls that come through here are looking for a free ride; wanting to become an Ol’ Lady; wanting protection or drugs. They’d be in your bed one minute, then with another brother's dick in a second if they thought it would get them up the ladder quicker. Dani was different, she came to me pure and innocent. She makes me work for her intimacy, and will push me away in anger. The only thing I can see she wants from me, is me. My only fear of that, is if she can handle all of me. So In the end, I’m glad I said it.

She turns her back on me and scoffs. I widen my eyes in disbelief. I just opened myself like a damn book and she turns her back on me?

“Right. Do you usually f*ck around on people you want to be with?” She is so sexy when she defies me, but she is also pissing me off. What the hell does she mean “do I usually f*ck around on people I want to be with”? I have never wanted to be with anyone before.

“Dani, I have never had a relationship with anyone; never wanted more than just a one night stand with anyone. You’re the first,” I say, letting out a breath. Maybe I should have never said anything. Maybe this was all just a big mistake.

She turns, her eyes are watery like she’s going to cry, staring at me like I just said words of gold. Shit, I hate it when chicks cry. I need to set her straight on what I am, what we are, before she thinks I’m some Romeo.

“What did you expect, Dani? When Candy told you a fraction of the man I am, you went running for the f*cking hills. I’m the f*cking Sargent-At-Arms of the Devil's Dust Motorcycle Club. I’m a murderer, an outlaw, a f*cking beast. There are no white picket fences and Sunday brunches on this side.” I stare her in the eyes as deeply as I can. I want her to know I’m no f*cking Prince Charming, not even close. This is the man I am; if she wants me, this is who she gets. There is no changing me to some Mr. Perfect.