The Space Between Us(98)
I sighed heavily. “Yeah, probably. But I’m just not ready yet. Maybe in a couple months. Plus,” I said as I turned to him and ran my hands up his chest. “I was thinking I needed a place to stay if I was going to be coming back to visit Willow Falls.” I felt him wrap his arms around me, his hands coming to rest on my backside, giving a gentle squeeze as a smile spread across his face.
“So you’ll be back then? I don’t have to worry about you running away and leaving me here, angry and confused?”
I reached up on my tip-toes and pressed a kiss against his lips. “I want to be with you, Asher, only you. But I’ve got to figure out my life right now. I’m going to go back to New York, get my art show behind me, and see what feels right after that.”
“This feels right,” he said, pushing his fingers through my hair, cupping his hand behind my head, pressing our foreheads together.
“It always has,” I responded softly.
“So we’re just going to trust each other and trust that everything will be ok in the end?”
“That and work at being better for each other than we have in the past.” I paused, closing my eyes. I opened them again to see his slate gray eyes staring back at me. “We’ve both made mistakes and I still need to work on letting go of some things. I want to be whole for you, if that makes sense.”
“So, this isn’t a goodbye then?”
I shook my head and smiled shyly.
“Good,” he said, returning the smile. “I hate goodbye kisses.” His arms snaked around my waist and picked me up off the ground, bringing my lips up to meet his, and he kissed me as if he missed me for years. And I kissed him right back.
A few hours had passed, the plane ride boring and a little bumpy. After landing, I made my way to a hotel near the gallery where my show would be taking place the next weekend. The city looked different to me. The buildings taller, the crowds on the street louder, the pace of life seemed to be in fast forward. I’d always felt a little out of place in the city, but I chalked it up to just being out of place in life. I hadn’t felt like I fit in anywhere, so it made sense that the city was a stranger to me.
But now, I didn’t feel out of place so much as I felt like a visitor, an imposter. Any minute someone would look at me hauling my suitcase behind me and tell me to go back to where I came from. The feeling was unnerving, but also a relief. It was the first time I had any strong feelings about where I belonged – or didn’t belong. It was a small step in the right direction. For the next week, I had a job to do. I had to make it through the art show and then I’d be free to make the decisions that were best for me.
I tried to unpack my clothes into the dresser of the hotel room I would be staying in for a while when my phone buzzed on the bedside table.
**Just wondering if your flight went well and if you’ve made it to wherever you were going ok.**
I smiled at the text from Asher. He was worried that I didn’t have a concrete plan on where I’d be staying. I’d tried to tell him that the possibilities were endless and that I’d be fine to just find a hotel when I arrived, but that made him nervous.
**The flight was predictable and I am settling in my four-star hotel as we text.**
**Four stars, huh? Don’t let the money change you, Bit.**
I wasn’t about to tell him that I was accustomed to staying in nice hotels with David. I wasn’t a snob and I wasn’t with David for his money, but no one could deny the comforts of a nice hotel if you could afford it.
**I’m sorry, from now on you’ll have to send all communication through my personal assistant. She’ll be handling my personal affairs while I roll around on hundred dollar bills.**
**Will you be clothed while you roll around in your money? And can your personal assistant take pictures?**
I laughed out loud at his text, didn’t take him long to get inappropriate. I shook my head. I laughed more in the last twenty-four hours than I had in years. It made me feel light and nearly carefree.
**Wouldn’t you like to know?**
**Seriously, which hotel are you staying in?**
**It’s just down the street from the gallery, The Franklin.**
I went back to unpacking and my phone buzzed a few minutes later.
**Ok. I checked out your hotel and it looks pretty safe. You don’t take the subway, do you? Take a cab if you go anywhere, or a town car would be even better.**
**You’re forgetting I have lived in this city for years now. I’ll be fine.**
**I just realized that if I had known where you were this whole time we’ve been apart, I probably would have gone crazy worrying about you.**
**No need to worry. I can take care of myself.**
**Don’t deny me the privileges that come along with loving you. Worrying is one of the perks.**
That made me smile. I’d never tire of hearing Asher say he loved me.
The days passed and I worked hard in my studio preparing for the show. I already picked most of the pieces weeks before the show, so most of the work this week was framing pieces, transporting them, and coordinating with the gallery to get them hung and lit accordingly. My mind often wandered to Asher, wondering what he was doing, where he was, if he was thinking of me as much as I was thinking of him. Of course, he never let me forget about him, and every day a different kind of flower was delivered to the hotel for me with a sweet note.