Semper Mine (Sons of War #1)(45)

I release her hand.

“You feel this way about Mikael, don’t you?” she asks.

“Yeah, I do.” We’re at eye level with me kneeling in front of her. Meeting her brown-green gaze, I try not to think about how close her body is. The tension is between us again, almost unbearable when we’re alone in the emotionally charged environment that follows us wherever we go. My fingers are twitching with the need to touch her, my body heated from the inside out.

We simply gaze at each other for a long time.

“Do you ever wish we could have a normal conversation?” she asks out of the blue. “Like other people do?”

I snort. “I hadn’t thought about it that way, but yeah.”

“Do you think it’s possible?”

“I don’t know, Katya.”

She nods and wipes her cheeks.

I hate seeing her sad.

The protective instinct I don’t want to feel is only getting stronger, compelling me to act when I’d rather walk away. Rarely do I do anything without a great deal of planning or control, but something about this woman touches the primal side of me that doesn’t feel constrained by deliberate thought.

I cup her cheeks with my hands and kiss her. I’m expecting her to freeze, to react negatively somehow.

Instead, she responds with the same unbridled passion she did last night. I shift to lean against the bed between her thighs, and her arms go around my neck. Her kisses are hot and deep, driven by emotion that makes my blood race and my adrenaline spike. Any thought of restraint melts under her fire, replaced by the need to feel her soft skin against mine and her body beneath me, to wear her scent and taste every inch of her body.

Just when I start to think we’re in some serious trouble, she breaks off the kiss and hugs me hard. Her breathing is rough in my ear, her large breasts pressed to my chest and her natural scent covered by shower smells.

My arms go around her, and I squeeze her into me, my resistance surprisingly low, even considering what I know about the risks of getting involved with her. I’m not usually one for hugs, but from her, I’m starting to enjoy them. Her knees part and I pull her more solidly into my body, recalling too well how we fit together as if made for one another.

A tap at our door prevents anything more from happening. I don’t know whether I’m relieved or frustrated. What’s clear: we’ve started something. I don’t know what the f*ck it is exactly, but it’s much more than I arrived here with.

“I’ll get it,” I say and withdraw reluctantly from her warm body.

Crossing to the door, I open it and see Jenna standing in the hallway.

“I can’t sleep,” she says.

“You can stay with me, hon,” Katya says.

I say nothing. It’s probably a good idea, even if every part of my body wants me to crawl in bed with Katya in the six-year-old’s place.

Disappearing into the bathroom, I take a cold, cold shower. The more I’m around Katya, the more I want to be around her.

It can’t happen. We can’t ever be anything. I chant the words mentally, resolved to the fact that nothing could ever work out between us, not with the circumstances that brought us together to begin with.

***

The kids sleep in the next morning, their reward for the grueling, muddy obstacle course. I get up early and go for a run then a swim to try to get rid of the sexual frustration that’s making me too wired to think straight.

When I return to the room, I see Jenna asleep in Katya’s bed. Katya, however, is nowhere to be found. We have a seven o’clock counselors meeting at the pool. Not daring to assume where she’ll be, I text her the same thing I’ve sent her at least twice a day since arriving.

Where are you?

Not expecting a quick answer, I take a shower and check the message awaiting me.

Pool.

Impressed that she’s ahead of me for once, I dress and head that way. With Petr on alert about Harris, I’m not as worried about her running into the shitbag who hit her. It’d shock me if Petr didn’t have a talk with Harris last night or if Harris didn’t show up black and blue today.

“Morning,” Riley greets me, trotting to join me.

“Morning.”

“First decent night of sleep here. No kids f*cking around in the middle of the night.” He sighs.

“You outta try running them through drills first thing. Seems to work.”

“Brianna doesn’t get up before six.”

“Drag her ass out of bed. If I can get Katya up, you can wake up Brianna,” I say with some amusement.

“Spiders?”

I laugh, recalling the look on Katya’s face. “Not my most creative method of motivation.”

Riley grins.

Before we reach the pool, I hear the raised voices: two females arguing. There’s no mystery as to who it might be. Riley and I exchange a look and trot towards the pool area.

“Never seen anyone who needed more of a kick in the ass than these two,” he mumbles.

“Agreed.”

We reach the pool area in time to see Katya punch Brianna. Teetering dangerously, Brianna nonetheless has the sense to snatch Katya before she topples backwards into the pool. They splash into it. Seconds later, they surface and continue fighting.

I never should’ve taught her to punch. This girl has some serious issues, and I’m not at all certain she’ll listen to anyone about going to counseling.