See How She Awakens (The Chronicles of Izzy #4)(57)

“Are you sure? I don’t want to leave you guys. I mean, y’all are my family. I just don’t think I can start moving forward here. There are too many things to hold me in the past.”

“It’s not like you are disappearing for good, Izzy. If we need you, trust me, we are going to come get you. Where will you go?” Molly sat down on the bench, reaching out to hold my hand as she settled in next to me.

“I don’t have the faintest clue.” Honestly, that is what had been keeping me there for as long as I had remained. I didn’t really have anywhere else to go.

I didn’t want to return to the house in Alabama or Chicago. Nor could I go back to the shack in the desert, or the Order headquarters in the swamp. Every last one of those places held too many memories. Memories of loss, of love, of a future I’d never have. I was adrift with nowhere to call home.

“Have you talked to Aberto about this?” Molly was using her empath skills on me; I could feel calm washing over me as the words left her. She and Sena had been working on developing her talents in the past few weeks. Now Molly could not only feel people’s emotions, but she could project emotions onto people.

“I don’t know how to bring it up. I don’t want to live in the dreaming, and I can’t really go back to any of the places I’ve been before. I don’t quite know where that leaves me.”

“Where do you want to go?” Molly stilled, waiting for my answer.

“Somewhere I’ve never been before. Somewhere I can start fresh. I don’t want to turn my back on the past, but I can’t live there either. I need a place that will offer me a new beginning. A chance to start moving forward. Does that make sense?” I turned to look at her, and I knew that in leaving her I would be losing the peace her company brought.

“All right. City or country?” Molly’s face turned determined. I could practically see her mind start working.

“Country. I don’t want to be closed in by people and buildings. I need somewhere I can think.” I’d at least figured that part out. Being surrounded by thousands of people just meant I would be able to see the darkness swimming under the surface. I’d never find any peace.

“Desert or mountains?”

“Are we playing fifty questions now?” I giggled. Once she’d set her mind to something, nothing would stop her. Apparently, I was her new project.

“No. But you didn’t answer. Desert or mountains?” Molly narrowed her eyes at me. I wasn’t going to get out of this without playing along.

“Mountains.” The desert reminded me of my time with Aberto in the shack. I didn’t want to remember how the darkness had taken over me.

“Alright, rocky, or tree lined?”

“Trees. Definitely trees.”

“What about the Appalachian mountains? It is secluded, has trees, and it is somewhere you’ve never lived before.” Molly looked awfully proud of herself.

“That could work, but where?”

“Just find a map of the Appalachian Trail and pick a small town close by. If I remember correctly, hiking brought you peace. Maybe you can find some there.” Molly patted my hand before standing up. I knew she had a lot on her plate. The last thing she needed to be doing was babysitting me. “You need to find yourself again, Izzy. You can’t do that here. If something comes up, we will find you. But for now, you need to go.”

“Are you sure?”

“It isn’t a request. You’re not any help if you stay here, pacing around like a caged animal. So, as the supreme leader of all things amazing, I’m ordering you to vamoose.” Molly took on her bossy tone as she stared me in the eye.

“Yes ma’am!” I said with a mock salute.

“Talk to the old man, and let me know where you decide to go.” Molly said over her shoulder as she made her way back toward the old house.

“Okay,” I muttered.

“I know of a town. One I have been through before.” Aberto said, popping back into existence. He’d been doing that a lot. Never remaining for too long. I knew he was trying to give me time to come to terms with things. To get back to myself, but like Molly said, it was impossible for me to do that here.

“Where? And seriously, bells.” He’d about made me jump out of my skin. Again.

“Bells?” Aberto seemed confused.

“Yes, bells. You need to wear them so I know you are coming. You keep startling me.”

“Perhaps I should yell boo next time.” The corner of Aberto’s mouth turned up in a half-smile.

“Did you just make a joke?” Unbelievable. The longer Aberto and I spent together, the more he loosened the reins on his typically stoic nature.

“I did. It was rather amusing. I don’t understand why you refuse to laugh.” A full-on smile erupted on his face as he sat down next to me.

“Because you aren’t as funny as you seem to think you are. Now, where is this place?”

“Damascus.”

“I thought that was in Syria.” My eyebrows creased in confusion.

“There is also one in Virginia. It is a rather transient place. The majority of the people are hikers passing through. I believe it is the sort of place where you may be able to find the peace you seek.”

“Would you mind?”