Saviour (Saviour #1)(32)
There I've said it and I don't care if I've insulted him. I’m far too old to be getting a dose of some nasty disease, or worse!
He laughs.
“Thanks for your high opinion of my morals but I can assure you, I do only ever practice safe sex and always wear a condom, I learnt the hard way, the consequences of taking the odd chance when my daughter was conceived. I also have regular check-ups, the last of which was just three weeks ago and I was given a completely clean bill of health and am not the carrier of herpes, syphilis or any other STD you care to name”
“Good, I'm glad to hear it”
“And I’m glad that you’re glad so are we good to go now that we have established I'm not riddled with dirty disease's?”
“Absolutely”
He kisses me hard on the mouth and I know I've pissed him off. He pushes his tongue in and around and the tension is gradually gone from my body, replaced by an all too familiar ache, way down, in the lowest part of belly.
His hands move to each of my bum cheeks and I arch into him, offering up my breasts, he takes the left in his mouth and grazes his teeth over my nipple then sucks on, it feels good, so good and I let out a little moan or whimper, I’m not really sure if the sound I made even has a name! He rolls my right nipple between his finger and thumb, then moves his mouth over and very, very gently sucks on it, every so often letting me feel his teeth on me. He moves one of his legs between mine so I have one leg up on the seat of the spa; the other is down on the floor. His hand moves under the water and between my legs, he slides his fingers inside me and circles my clit with his thumb, his mouth is on me, kissing at my neck, my shoulders my breasts. I reach below the water and take his cock in my hand and start to stroke him, I feel an enormous shudder run through him as I grip tighter and move my hand up and down. He is rock hard. My God, I want him, I want him to the point where I almost feel sick, it’s the strangest sensation, if I allowed myself, I might possibly pass out, overwhelmed just about covers it, so many emotions are bubbling to the surface, along with a desire like I have never known, never dreamed could even exist, not in real life anyway. He looks up at me and I feel like liquid, like I'm dissolving into the water of the spa.
“I want you Lauren, I want you so f*cking badly, but I'm scared I'm going to hurt you”
I feel so light headed; this whole scene seems surreal, like I'm looking at it from the outside in. I take a breath and stroke the side of his face with my hand
“You won’t hurt me, I know you won't hurt me, please Gabe, I want this, I really want this”
His eyes close and barely open again, the only light is from the sunken lights in the floor of the deck and those from inside of the spa, they only go to enhance the colour of Gabe’s eyes and right now they are the most amazing shade of blue.
“Do you have any idea what it does to me, when I hear you say that? I know what this all means to you Lauren. I just want you to be sure, I don’t want you to have any regrets, because once we do this, there is no going back and I really don’t want to be responsible for your guilt, so tell me now if you’re not sure”
“I feel no guilt, my marriage is over, there is no going back for me, and right now, I am exactly where I want to be and I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else, with anyone else, only you”
“Only me” It’s not a question, it’s just a statement of the facts. He strokes his thumb over my cheek, my jaw and my lips, the way that he looks at me is almost reverential, I don’t think I’ve ever felt so desired, so safe, so wanted.
“I want to show you how it should be Lauren, how it can be, I want us to be equal and I want you to always tell me, tell me when you like something, tell me when you don’t, when you want more or when you need less, always tell me. This is new and different for both of us and I just want to get this right for you baby, so promise, you’ll tell me?”
“I promise”
“Good girl”
Fuck, I am almost in a dream state. I feel more stoned than last night, when there were actual drugs involved; that’s what it is, he drugs me, intoxicates me, it’s like I’m tripping, just on the edge of reality and I could just so easily slip away, out of myself, out of my mind and body and watch from above, but that’s not what I want. I want, no I need to feel every sensation he can offer me, every stroke, every bite, every kiss. I want to over dose on it and even then, it won’t be too much, there could never be too much of what I’m feeling now. God no wonder people become junkies if this is the state they permanently walk around in, who wants reality when this is an option?
He shifts forward on his seat and moves his other leg between mine and tilts his hips up and lifts me, I wrap my legs around him and holding on to my hips, he lowers me down onto him and enters me, very gently, very slowly, looking up into my eyes the whole time.
“Fuck baby, that feels good, but you must tell me if I hurt you Lauren”
I rock my hips forward so that he goes into me deeper.
“Fuck that feels good Lauren” He moans and whispers in my ear, “Cazzo, Bella”
Oh. My. Lordy. Lord. Lord, I have no idea what it means or even if that’s what he said. He could be telling me I smell like sheep… I. DON’T. CARE…It sounds amazing and I am just, gone, lost. His
We move together and find our rhythm. I tighten my legs around him, pulling him in deeper still. It's almost painful but it feels so good at the same time and I know I'm not going to last long.